Beyoncé Wants You To Buy $300 Picture Book

WikiHow exists. It’s free. It’s the online version to get a general idea of how to do everything from hide a body to be an adult. Beyoncé exists. She does not believe in WikiHow or the general public’s competence. That’s why she’s banking on stans to purchase her version of How To Make Lemonade. It doesn’t even have spread eagle lesbian bondage pics like Madonna’s SEX book. Good times. If you plan on over paying for a collector’s edition of an already released album, you’re the problem. Please find the nearest browser. Launch WikiHow and search how to not make mistakes. Overpaying for any of Beyoncé’s bullshit is the first step in the results. 

Beyoncé has announced a new $300 box set for her most recent album Lemonade. The made-to-order collector’s edition item, dubbed the How To Make Lemonade Box Set, features the album on vinyl, as well as a 600-page coffee table book with “hundreds of never-before-seen photos” from the making of the album. The book features a foreword from Dr. Michael Eric Dyson, as well as poetry by Warsan Shire. The box set marks the first vinyl pressing of the album, and the records will come in a lemon color. 

What a steal. For only $300 I can receive a coffee table book and vinyl album. I was just about to make a charitable donation, but I believe my money would be better spent on Beyoncé photos. Nope, not in this lifetime. Is she even aware how far you can stretch a good time for $300 rather than buying hymns about her rapper husband’s infidelity? He’s a rapper. Bitches and money have been in the blueprint since day one. A ring wasn’t going to stop the quest for new vagina. And charging fans $300 won’t recoup the faux heartache when you already have plenty of 100 bills to wipe away your tears. Instead of labeling parental advisory on the cover, please put a financial trap advisory. The only person proud to purchase this would be underaged and spending their entire week’s cashier career check on this. 

_{Photo Credit: Getty Images}