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Taylor Swift Reputation And Katy Perry Swish Swish And Who Cares

 

Taylor Swift and Katy Perry have been pummeling media headlines with the lead ups to their respective projects in respectively blasé, one-liner ways. While Perry claims that the two former fake rivals no longer want to pummel each other, Perry's new video for supposed non-diss diss track Swish Swish dropped at the same time Taylor Swift pulled her fame ho shit for her upcoming album, titled Reputation. Swift's recent sparse presence has felt nothing if not calculated, so you have to imagine the timing is no coincidence. 

Perry brought the woke circus to town while pimping out her album Witness, with the ringleader being a past-her-prime Grauman's Theater Miley Cyrus impersonator with dwindling career options. The video for her single Swish Swish, the dance track that's as exciting to listen to as a ninety-year-old's heart murmur, is being lauded as "Unwatchable!" and "I took my own life!" Perry is on a quirky underdog basketball team and literally slams the h8ers with some slam dunks towards the end of the video. Oh, did I mention she's thirty-two-years-old? And not handicapped? As far as we know.

On the other side we have Swift, who envisions herself the stealth, savvy type able to garner attention through a less-is-more approach. If she wasn't so far up her own chalupa that she could give herself a Pap smear by sticking out her tongue, it'd be a welcome alternative to glitter lez Perry. Swift deleted her entire Insta library before replacing it with three cryptic snake videos, and then, finally, the album artwork for Reputation. Swift's face, serene yet stoic, appears to endure a barrage of media headlines. Brave. Is a word that has lost all meaning thanks to these fame whores. 

The commonality between the two singers is a) they're a decade older than new starlets who haven't become bitches yet and b) they somehow still view themselves as victims. If there is a feud, Swift is currently winning. People are deep throating her album teases, and tonight's release of the first single will have overweight Tumblr girls all in a tizzy. But both women suck so hard and extort trash people for millions by appealing to them as relatable. They're corporations. And we all lose. Especially whoever watches the video above.

 

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

 

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

Photo Credit: Instagram, YouTube

Tagged in: taylor swift, katy perry

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