Maroon 5 frontman and all around sexy lesbian Adam Levine had the bowel-movements like Jagger while his wife was in labor with his daughter back in 2016. He shared this baby book-worthy family memory during his appearance last night on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, where Levine further explained that his experience of almost dropping a load in his pants can be attributed to advise he received from Carson Daly, who – fun fact to know and share – is apparently still with us(?). Levine paraphrases Daly’s words of fatherhood wisdom:
Remember to eat. A large percentage of new dads pass out because they forget to take care of themselves and don’t nourish their bodies with food and faint a lot of the time.
Alex, I’ll take “what are things anorexic people say” for $500. Levine took this advice and ran with it, to the point that he almost exploded in his panties while his wife was pushing a human out of her no-no, and undoubtedly sharting out half her body weight in the process. Thunder, you have been stolen:
So [wife Behati Prinsloo] kind of went into labor throughout the day, and it was beautiful. I was eating a lot though. We finally go to the hospital, I’ve put back an unbelievable amount of food. Like basically bursting at the seams, I was gonna s— my pants. Also, my wife is in labor and it’s the lamest thing to be when your wife is going to be having a baby and you’re like ‘I got to take a s—.’ That’s not, in any way, a viable complaint. So you got to keep it inside, literally and figuratively. It was brutal.
What a gross thing to share on national television. I guess today’s takeaway is that if you have completely run out of things to offer the world, pull the ol’ smoke and mirrors by making everyone picture your quivering dilated asshole. I think that’s the takeaway at least.
Photo Credit: YouTube