Fake news. Fake news fake news fake news. Kim Kardashian can’t read. After an afternoon of grazing in a field of penises and laxatives, the most majestic centaur around saddled up to her supposed “inaugural book club meeting” to spill the deets about her amazingly trim waist. In equine lingo so would be about 16 hands high and weigh about a billion pounds, but somehow this translates to being skinny and desirable in human terms. It all began when Kourtney started awkwardly hitting on her sister:
I can’t take your hips seriously right now. Because your waist is so small and your hips are so big.
24. It’s never been 24 ever in my life.
She then added that her hips are 39-inches around. To be honest I really don’t have a frame of reference for waist sizes, but now I at least know that a 24 to 39-inch waist to hip ratio must be defined in the medical community as “hilarious” because I’m not seeing anything to brag about in this new pic that Kim posted to coincide with her breaking waist news. Kim’s proportions are an affront to common decency and were obviously procured with the help of a Groupon surgeon, so she’s more confessing that she was a victim of a doctor’s complete disregard for any sort of medical oath than she is bragging about fitness and diet. Gentlemen, I present our new beauty standard.
Photo Credit: Instagram