Paula Jones Again (VIDEO)

Trotting Paula Jones out for another recounting of a Bill Clinton Governor pants dropping is a sure sign this election is just about over. Hillary Clinton may be the most insidious Corleone shrunken apple head sister and her fake husband may be more rapey than all the... read more

Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes Going Strong Despite Obstacles

Here's a thing. Half the guys in your high school or college drama programs were gay. The number of openly gay male movie actors approximates zero. Either the reprogramming ministers are working wonders on the Greyhounds to Los Angeles or certain somebodies are finding... read more

Tara Reid Key Get for Maxim

The second best looking woman at Maxim's Halloween party was Magic Johnson's son. In the right light, or absence thereof, Tara Reid was the best. Mark down the year in which your mediocre Halloween party list surpassed Maxim magazine's. read more

Paris Hilton Corrupting The Youth

Paris Hilton has been shoving herself in front of paparazzi cameras with Sofia Richie, Lionel Richie's 18 year old daughter. If you could tell Richie was a prick based on his wardrobe and music videos, the way his children have turned out should be exhibit A. Not... read more

Justin Bieber's Real Ticket Buyers Speak Out

Justin Bieber threw a temper tantrum in London protesting the fact that his screaming fans weren't taking him seriously as an artist. Sasha Grey was known to do the same during her double penetration scenes. These outbursts can last a few years until society recycles the... read more

Selena Gomez on 5-Star Lockdown

If the empty chairs in pastoral retreat settings tell you anything, it's mental health facility. Hotel and vacation promotional photos always show couples holding hands. Rehab centers empty chairs. Somebody needs to work on the iconography. No reason to rub in the feeling... read more

Caitlin Stasey Gets Topless Again And Shit Around The Web

Caitlin Stasey knows Instagram is for topless pics. She uses it as a tool to teach her specific brand of feminist empowerment. Smile and tug. She'll assume you're listening. read more

Never Go Against the Family

MediaTakeOut made its bones by publishing many of the early hacked celebrity email and text nudes before Scarlett Johansson and Jennifer Lawrence muscled the FBI into the equation and made re-posting that shit plain suicidal. The Feds are one thing. The Kardashian legal... read more

Olivia Wilde Breastfeeding Points

There's a quiet dignity in being part of the hundred million women a year who breastfeed their babies without so much as a selfie or Instagram shoutout to woman power. At some point wealthy celebrity women having kids in their 30's decided that snapping photos of their... read more

Subway Jared's Ex Wants a Taste (VIDEO)

Jared Fogle's second ex-wife is suing Subway because she claims the fast food franchise knew all along her husband was a creepy sex offender but kept it from both Americans who love shitty cheap food and herself. read more

Lady Gaga Riding High

Lady Gaga is riding high on a positively reviewed new album, Joanne. Also, she lost weight so she can do the mostly naked thing in public again. She was formerly relying on the unsupported belief that fishnet deftly disguises chub. read more

Kendall Jenner Stalker Let Loose

Kendall Jenner's crazy ass stalker was acquitted by a jury for jumping out of the bushes everywhere this chick goes because stalking charges are super hard to make stick. At least until there's a bloody corpse on the ground and a guy in handcuffs screaming, "Why wouldn't... read more