Channing Tatum Cops to Rape Culture

If you must ask somebody about the societal problem of sexual assaults against women, might as well grab Channing Tatum during a press tour and force him to speak to the issue. Cosmopolitan live-streamed an interview with Tatum from Cannes where they naturally asked him about Stanford swimmer Brock Turner's light sentence for trying to go Cosby on a passed out girl behind a frat house. Tatum quite impossibly further...read more

Ariel Winter Has A Nice Butt Too And Shit Around The Web

Ariel Winter wants to be thought of as more than just a pair of tits. She's also got a really nice ass. It's amazing what a healthy dose of body shaming Twitter rants will do to a girl's selfies once she loses some weight.read more

BET Awards Flummoxed Justin Timberlake

Jesse Williams who stars on Grey's Anatomy meaning that your wife or girlfriend knows who he is but you assumed he was a forward for the Pelicans, made a pointed speech about racism during his BET trophy acceptance for being black. Though not black enough that half the crowd wasn't yellow bones shaming him under their breath.read more

Mariah Carey Feathers Blac Chyna (VIDEO)

If you've ever been to a Vegas show and buy into a spur of the moment decision by the entertainer to bring a seemingly unaware volunteer up on stage, you're being duped. On the same level as the girl you called to come dance in your room who says she needs to bring her friend along because they're sharing an Uber. Every single moment of these big budget shows are staged and timed and rehearsed. Roy knew precisely when...read more

Brexit Vote Has Unhinged the Coeds

You can never go wrong choosing political positions the opposite to heavy set college girls marching in the street. They're obviously not marching enough. Voting gaps aren't as simple as crotchety old men versus vibrant muffin top millennials. It's a gap between those working a paycheck to feed family and nation and those arranging to meet their friends at The Coffee Bean at 10am for a morning klatch. Everybody was...read more

Kanye Movie 'Famous' Features Taylor Swift Naked and Ray-J Fucking His Wife (VIDEO)

Kanye West invited his entire herpes tree to the L.A. Forum to witness the premiere of his long form music video for 'Famous'. The short film was streamed live to all eleven paid subscribers on the Tidal music service that everybody was certain had gone under last year. The eight minute movie deals head on with the insurmountable odds of surviving fame and fortune. It turns out they are only slightly higher than those...read more

Michael Jackson Obvious Pedophile

If you're still defending Michael Jackson go fuck yourself. It's okay to admit you're wrong. It's an admirable quality. Sit out Billy Jean at the wedding, this dude raped children. The police routinely frame people for various crimes and plant evidence. Yet, they don't have a ton of child porn floating around in their trunks. Do the fucking math.read more

Terry Richardson Fosters Nurture Argument

Terry Richardson is allowed to get away with being an obvious predator because he's a hipster with sideburns. Apparently a lot of chicks want to do porn yet not admit it. Here's your loophole, and we all know the truth. Do not take them to dinner unless you want to get lectured about gender equality by a chick with dried cum in her extensions.read more

BET Awards Importing Fine Slapping Ass and Shit Around the Web

L.A. strip clubs are scouring the land for the finest black booty to work the stages and rooms for the BET Awards weekend. It's like a junior version of an NBA All-Star game which still leads the world in big professional ass imports. Our nation's sports and television figureheads must be ground properly.read more

There's a Rooster Teeth Channel and They Have the Tits (Mr. Skin Minute Video)

TV content used to be the purview of a small handful of powerful media conglomerates. Now anybody with a camera and a laptop can distribute programming. Wonderful news if ignoring the lessons of YouTube giving everybody a channel. Video compression and server farms didn't cause the general population to become Vince Gilligan.read more

Snapchat Remains Vaguely Successful (VIDEO)

The lifecycle of all social media platforms is that nobody over fourteen understands them at launch, the dude who invents them makes a billion dollars and gets to fuck a supermodel, and nobody admits to themselves the entire thing is merely a new medium for commercials.read more

The Nike Wimbledon Dress Gets Re-Stitched

Wimbledon seems important in those moments you forget it's a British tennis tournament. Cute. Nobody from Latvia is buying tickets now that you left them paying for Greece's unfunded DMV worker pensions. Nike designed a tennis dress for their sponsored athletes based largely on 1980's Hamptons hooker wear.read more

Charlotte McKee in A Bikini

It's a big day when a New York based fashion model heads down to Miami for representation. Blank-faced Polaroids in nude underwear become salacious glossies in bikinis. New York wants tiny tits and boyish bodies. Miami wants giant screaming honkers and streams of last night's rapper cream pie running down your leg.read more

Heidi Klum Hosts A Party For Herself

You're never too old to lick a dripping ice cream cone in the manner of a fellatio big finish. The theme of Heidi Klum's Macy's launch party was lingerie and frozen deserts. One of these things was made within ten thousand miles of the store. Only fat sweaty people eat ice cream in their underwear.read more

Chris Brown Hits For The Cycle (VIDEO)

If Chris Brown understood the concept of irony he'd really enjoy reading his paperback biography while he's permanently locked up six years from now. We'll leave a few pages at the end so you can write in your conversion to Islam, OJ Light.read more