Douche Wants Jim Carrey's Money

The loser Scientologist estranged husband of Jim Carrey's dead girlfriend is suing him for her wrongful death, in hopes that next time a loved one dies he can afford to attend the funeral. read more

Martin Shkreli To Be Punched For Charity

Martin Shkreli is desperately trying to win over his haters. A new haircut would be a good start. He just auctioned off the rights to "repeatedly pummel me in the face" to a woman in Florida for $50,000. If he dies, he dies. read more

Sara Jean Underwood Post-Feminism

After a long hard day there's no better way to relax than with a long slow pull of female objectification. It's like drinking, but you can drive yourself home safely even after an hour of pounding. read more

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Knott's Berry Farm Badgered Into Shutting Down It's Crazy

Knott's Berry Farm used to be a Berry Farm. Don't ask me how I know that. A few light rides were enough to drive ticket sales many decades ago. Now they have fiery fast roller coasters and gang banging to go with the fruit preserves. read more

Gisele Bundchen Vacations In A Thong Bikini And Shit Around The Web

Gisele Bundchen let's us see that thong in Italy. She's never been a crazy attractive woman but she perfected how to be anorexic without looking sickly. That's a breakthrough in the objectification of women sciences. read more

Kerrie McMahon Topless Plan Isn't Working Peachy

Kerrie McMahon is that Irish born model who came to the U.S. and immediately complained about how aggressive the men are. Including guys who are now stalking her. If her plan was to counter horny loons with tons of barely covered titty modeling shots, it's not working. read more

Chelsea Clinton Cosmo Puff Piece Promotes Rape Culture

Every Presidential candidate as their go-to ball licking media outlets. The Clintons have Hearst and their New York women's magazines in the pocket. Daughter Chelsea was scheduled up with a softball spread about her mom in Cosmopolitan but became counter-programmed by... read more

Rob Kardashian Had Romantic Feelings For His Sister

Nobody sinks with class anymore. Playboy magazine, defeated politicians, The Cleveland Browns. Add to that list Still Fat Rob Kardashian who at or around thirty with ten years of protesting his family's lewd on-camera business behind him, has now sunk his teeth fully into... read more

Playboy Magazine Lost in the Wilderness

Playboy magazine was doomed long before they made the commercial decision to nix nudity from their nudie magazine. They're the railroad in an era of air travel. Turn your cabin cars into cargo haulers and pray for healthy government subsidies. read more

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Vicki Gunvalson Starts Incorruptible Charity

If your ex boyfriend lied about having lymphoma and forged documents to prove it, there are a few things you're just not supposed to do. Starting a cancer charity may be first on the list. Also, associating yourself with in any way with cancer or talking ever again to... read more

Miley Cyrus Pay Gapped

Miley Cyrus did a lengthy interview with Elle discussing many topics. Central of which, how she prepares to be on The Voice, which mostly entails getting high and annoying the contestants on single cam. read more

Amber Heard Broke-Ass

When your buddy who sells magazine subscriptions after waking up midday in a stony haze informs you he's broke, you don't need to ask any followups. Amber Heard's earned somewhere around the ten million plus mark in her film and modeling career. When she says she's broke... read more