The 10 Hottest Female Olympians of All Time [Sponsored]

By admin April 19, 2013 @ 1:29 PM

Whether they flame out in the time trails or bring glory to their tiny island nation, these attractive female athletes represent their nation’s flags with pride. Or they don’t, but they’re still very good looking, which is truly what’s important.

Are you a deep thinker looking for something to do this Sunday night? Check out the series premiere of What Would Ryan Lochte Do? this Sunday at 10/9c only on E!

Bruno and Eminem at MTV Movie

By admin June 01, 2009 @ 1:11 AM

If Eminem wasn’t in on this joke, the next time we see Sacha Cohen he’ll probably have lost a lot of weight. Running for your life is pretty good exercise, I bet.

Kate rocks her bikini bod

By admin June 01, 2009 @ 1:10 AM

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Stuff like that headline, or, oh, better yet, “This woman has 8 kids?!?!” is the kind of thing that would be here if this was Entertainment Tonight or People, or if it was the beginning of our journey to the land of make believe.

I’m sure tons of women would love to convince us Kate looks good because it lowers the bar for all of them, but she doesn’t. She looks like shit. That she had 8 kids is irrelevant. My penis is like a great white shark: it can’t be bargained with, it can’t be reasoned with, it doesn’t care about explanations or excuses. Look at Denise Milani. She’s a girl, and she’s at the beach just like Kate. So why doesn’t Kate look like Denise? Is it laziness? Selfishness? It might be all that and more, but there are just as many Denise pictures as ones of Kate below, so hopefully this will help balance Kate’s monster-like appearance.

(image source = splash.  full size jump = here)

Bruno at MTV – update

By admin June 01, 2009 @ 1:09 AM

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Bruno is already funnier than Andy Samberg and he’s not even really doing anything. It’s about 30 minutes in right now, and all of Sambergs jokes have sucked, but to be fair, he only had like 6 months to come up with anything. He’s not a miracle worker.

Note – they just gave Breakthrough Male to the Twilight guy, and Andy should be very grateful that Jonah Hill was there to out unfunny him. Things That Are Funnier So Far Tonight Than Andy Samberg: 1- Bruno in these pictures. 2- JJ Abrahms playing the keyboard. 3- Just knowing that Zach Galifianakis is in “the Hangover”. 4- The stairs. 5- Anything on earth, living or dead.

2nd Note – Bruno.  Eminem.  No fucking way.

SEXY UPDATE – now even hotter thx to more pics.  I bet one of the photographers dropped their phone on purpose so Bruno would have to bend over and pick it up.  Another good trick is to drop some money.  You just drop it by their feet.  And then you’re all like, Oh no, baby, it would seem I’ve dropped that money.  Why don’t you be a little angel and pick it up for me?

Vanessa Hudgens at MTV Movie

By admin May 31, 2009 @ 6:31 PM

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I guess I owe Andy Sambeg an apology. Bruno dropped his nuts in Eminens face and then Andy came on. Andys approach to improv appears to be this: Don’t. Don’t say anything. Just act like the moment that will be the stuff of award show legend for the next 20 years didn’t happen. Just pretend like you we’re looking at something else, over there, where nothing funny was happening.

Instead of getting Samberg to host this show, MTV should have gotten a homeless guy to blow his nose in his hand and then wipe it on my shirt. After that just scroll the winners names across the screen. There’s no way that could be any worse and it probably would have saved everyone a lot of money.

Megan Fox at MTV Movie

By admin May 31, 2009 @ 5:16 PM

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The 2009 MTV Movie Awards started 5 minutes ago, and not even Megan Fox can make me look forward to this crap.  Andy Samberg is not funny, and if anyone thinks otherwise you’re an idiot and you’re wrong.   I tivo’d a show about German panzers in North Africa in WWII yesterday and I kinda wanted to watch that but I’m obligated to watch this.  Not only would the show about tanks be a better show, it would probably have better jokes too.