LeAnn Rimes Plain Old-Fashioned Crazy

March 18, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Leann Rimes is slightly different than some of her ‘done gone crazy’ musical peers in so much as she can actually sing. Unfortunately for Leann, that only kind of makes her seem crazier. When shitty singers with over the... READ MORE

Tamara Ecclestone Switches to Pink

March 16, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Upon further review, basically, staring more and more at Tamara Ecclestone’s inflated tubes, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d still let her be my super rich bitchy wife. Why not? If you’re going to choose to spend the... READ MORE

Britney Spears’ Boyfriend Stuck in Her Rear

March 16, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

This shit is getting pretty stupid now. Britney Spears boyfriend has a name, David Lucardo, but he’s still not allowed to walk next to her. Not sure who came up with this half-baked strategy, but it’s obviously intentional. Perhaps... READ MORE

Olivia Wilde Is Good Looking, Cankles and All

March 15, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Far be it for a guy with every single body part in the ‘imperfect to downright mediocre’ category to find any fault with Olivia Wilde, an actress best known for just being super good looking. But she’s got cankles... READ MORE

Leon’s Getting Larger

March 15, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s just about time to blow the flute and order the Oompas to roll Kim Kardashian off to the juicing room as the world’s biggest merch whore swells with the gestation of her billion dollar bastard baby. If you... READ MORE

Kick-Ass 2 Red Band Trailer (VIDEO)

March 14, 2013 | video | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I dug Kick-Ass. Unexpectedly good since (a) almost all comic book based movies disappoint, (b) it looked pretty shitty in early trailers, and (c) most childhood actors have shrill annoying voices, much like most children themselves. But I liked... READ MORE

Claudia Romani Flashing Her Butt Cheeks in Miami

March 13, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Female butt cheeks don’t get the attention they deserve. By any man’s calculations, they fall into the Top 5 of important parts, but only the discerning gentleman knows that ass belongs at the top of the list. Mother Nature... READ MORE

Counterpoint: Halle Berry Still a Hot Dream

March 13, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

People who say Halle Berry is just OK are both blind, and probably racist too. Not that there’s anything wrong with being blind. Halle Berry is 46-damn years old and I’d dare you to name another woman her age... READ MORE

Shit Happened Fast for Kate Upton

March 12, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

You never forget the first time you see an eighteen year old getting paid to be in her underwear. Kate Upton did this lingerie modeling gig as she turned barely legal; not exactly the Hustler version of the concept,... READ MORE

Johanna Larson Pokies in Palm Springs

March 12, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s really no cheaper thrill than staring at a woman’s nipples through her sweaty top. Nor better. I can really only speak to the embarrassing inopportune engorgements of the males of the species. I’d have to imagine the female... READ MORE