Kourtney Kardashian Reveals Her Weight, People Care

February 20, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Congratulations are in order for Kourtney Kardashian. The Jenndashian brothel mate is apparently one of the stars of Keeping Up With the Prostitutes, but at only five feet tall, she often doesn’t clear the hight needed to be picked up by the cameras. At least this is the best explanation I can think of as to […]

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Jennifer Lawrence Wanted To Eat Nude All The Time On Set

February 20, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

You know that point in an actress’ career when she starts to hype her own nude scenes, even though previously she deflected conversations about sexuality because she was young and fresh and didn’t need the extra attention? You know, when she used to be able to just trip on stage to be endeared to the […]

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See Gabriella Papadakis’ Wardrobe Malfunction Nipple

February 19, 2018 | nipslip | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Even if your chosen profession is as innocent as figure skating, you’re still just one broken sequined strap away from being a hooker, and after suffering a wardrobe malfunction that exposed her tit last night at the 2018 PyeongChange Winter Olympics, French skater Gabriella Papadakis is now a nude athletic sensation. The best thing since […]

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Adam Rippon Takes Tiny Dump On NBC

February 19, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Olympic skater Adam Rippon can only spin around three times in the air instead of four, so he is of course garbage in the eyes of the 2018 PyeongChange Olympic judges and most of the world. Even though a lack of ariel dexterity kept Rippon out of contention for a men’s singles medal, he struck a chord […]

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Kendall Jenner Feeling :(

February 19, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Whenever a Jenndashian comes down from the unique buzz created by the mixing of seeping ass implant juices and lint covered horse Xanax from the bottom of Kris Jenner’s purse (allegedly, don’t sue) she must turn to the “How do you feel today?” chart on the fridge and attempt to contort her numbed face muscles into […]

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Kate Middleton Shamed For Wearing Green, Hating Women

February 19, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

At this weekend’s BAFTA Awards, celebrities took the Golden Globes approach to fashion by looking super bangable in the most universally flattering color in order to end sex once and for all. Cleavage as far as the eye could see sent a clear message to the world – “We are not your sex objects.” A […]

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Alicia Vikander Admits Breasts Not Triangular Like Lara Croft’s

February 18, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The 2018-approved Lara Croft that we don’t have to pretend to not be attracted to is well into her ho stroll for Tomb Raider – set to premiere March 16th – and while talking to Graham Norton, Croft portrayer Alicia Vikander described the differences between her body and that of the original four pixel PC […]

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Open Post: Beast Details Getting Mounted While Pregnant

February 17, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Beast Kardashian just went into detail about having sex while pregnant and it’s just as disturbing and ungodly and frankly amoral as you would think. I’m finally coming forward with my story. I have been sexually molested by Khloé’s description of preggers sex. Check it out and let us know where she touched you in the […]

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Christina Aguilera, Courtney Stodden, Or Random Hooker?

February 16, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

I wanted to set you guys up with something really special and hot before the weekend but then I saw this and thought you might actually want to see a 90’s cum storage facility in a bathtub. Did I guess correctly? Actually, Christina Aguilera always struck me as someone who had about as much pizzazz […]

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Blind Item: Movie Actress Did Coke And Now Permanently Messed Up

February 16, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Jennifer Lawrence stars in Red Sparrow, which is coming out at the beginning of March. So… Amy Schumer provided Jennifer Lawrence with cocaine at her wedding? I thought coke was an appetite suppressant. Check out this week’s blind item below and give us your best guess in the comments.   “This A+ list mostly movie […]

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