Who’d You Rather: Jennifer Lopez Or Elizabeth Hurley

September 17, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Jennifer Lopez and Elizabeth Hurley are each a thousand-years-old, and a thousand-year-old things are gross. Yet here we are. Looking at two thousand-year-old's very ungross bodies. Hurley transitioned into horned up desperate MILFhood quite seamlessly, and has all but cornered the market... READ MORE

The Britney Spears Fitness Regimen Works

September 12, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

...The way to cheat the system is to have a psychotic break in adulthood that turns your brain into applesauce, and then to have your freewill handed over to people who benefit monetarily from your ability to be fuckable. Is... READ MORE

Naomi Campbell And David Blaine Make A Gross Couple On A Yacht

August 22, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The legacy of attractive women getting with fat greasy fucks continues as Naomi Campbell and David Blaine appear to be an item, at least if you go by these pics of the duo cuddling on a yacht in St. Tropez... READ MORE

Alec Baldwin Not A Fan Of His Daughter’s Ass

August 20, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The worst kind of rejection a daughter can receive is her father not being into her slutty knockoff Kardashian Insta ass. This is exactly the type of public humiliation fake model Ireland Baldwin recently faced when her father Alec... READ MORE

Kim Kardashian Bounces On A Trampoline And Nothing Moves. At. All.

August 9, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

We have new insight as to what exactly might be injected into Kim Kardashian's disgusting body thanks to a video of the majestic centaur bouncing up and down on a trampoline. Her tits don't move. At all. And the... READ MORE

Would You Hit It: Duh Edition – Salma Hayek

August 9, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

#nofilter #noretouching A post shared by Salma Hayek Pinault (@salmahayek) on Aug 8, 2018 at 10:34am PDT   At fifty-one-years-old, Salma Hayek’s gigantic boobs have been turning boys into masturbating men for decades, and even if they weren’t a... READ MORE

Would You Hit It: Sloppy Tit Ball Ariel Winter’s Oddly Smooth Ass Cheeks

July 26, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Recently Winter has focused on pointing the camera towards her huge sloppy twenty-year-old tits and even sloppier lip job in order to rake in sponsored sloppy eyebrow bucks. Maybe it's Kylie Jenner's full-stop shunning of any and all lip... READ MORE

Would You Hit It: Sarah Hyland’s Either Hot Or Weird Bikini Bod

July 6, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Sarah Hyland's face has been through so many iterations at the age of twenty-seven that it's almost like she's an Animorph and her secret identity is a turd, but that doesn't mean that she's altogether the worst thing to... READ MORE

Bella Hadid Almost There For Vogue Mexico

June 27, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Japanese sex robot to the stars Bella Hadid has been programmed by a team of specialists to make you horny, and yet even with all the tuneups (and nips and tucks) she still comes across as, oh IDK, a random... READ MORE

All My Children Actress Says Times Up For Gender Bias

June 20, 2018 | bikini | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I automatically assume if you’re a man that secretly watches soap operas you have other skeletons in your closet the same size of the dinosaurs on display at The Museum of Natural History. For everyone else not familiar with... READ MORE