Sarah Hyland Is Multiple People Sewn Together In New Bikini Pics And You Should Be Scared

January 9, 2019 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  Sarah Hyland goes through kidneys like she’s procuring them from a Pez dispenser, and her passion for whatever drug keeps blowing out her organs (ALLEGEDLY, don’t sue) is beginning to show. As in she looks like multiple people... READ MORE

New Mariah Carey Bikini Pics Sponsored By Photoshop And The Year 2000

January 7, 2019 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  View this post on Instagram   A post shared by Mariah Carey (@mariahcarey) on Jan 4, 2019 at 3:47pm PST   People actually think that these new Insta pics of Mariah Carey looking hot in a bikini were... READ MORE

Would You Hit It: Katy Perry Moth From Silence Of The Lambs Bikini Dumper

January 3, 2019 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  This statement might cost me my pussy hat privileges, but I generally don’t think women with short hair are sexy or that they have anything to offer this world in general. Ya know? Obviously this excludes chemo patients. And... READ MORE

Britney Spears Crazy For Fitness In Sexy New Video

December 3, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  We previously detailed the advantages of being in a constant anti-psychotic medication-induced zombified stupor ala Britney Spears. They are many. But the main one is that your handlers – incentivized to keep you looking fuckable – can put... READ MORE

Now You: Beach Or Mountains

November 11, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  Now’s the time of the year when those of us not getting smoked out of our mansions in sunny SoCal start daydreaming about escaping the cold weather. I love going to the beach, and I also love going to... READ MORE

Today We Remember Elizabeth Hurley’s Sanity

November 6, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  View this post on Instagram   Ninja Halloween Maldives style @elizabethhurleybeach @milaidhoo #davinaonepiece A post shared by Elizabeth Hurley (@elizabethhurley1) on Oct 31, 2018 at 11:21pm PDT   Old age and a level of hotness that continues to... READ MORE

Yeezy Model And Hooker Shannade Clermont Facing 20 Years In Prison For Stealing From Overdosed John

November 2, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Remember, no debit cards on hand when banging klepto hookers on Fentanyl. Lesson of the day. READ MORE

Farrah Abraham Picks A Wedgie Out Of Her Big Taint

October 26, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Not to send you into a hypersexual overdrive leading up to the whoriest weekend of the year (you’re going to need to save those juices for Bella Thorne’s Instagram) but we’ve got pics of Farrah Abraham picking a wedging... READ MORE

Who’d You Rather: Selena Gomez Or Ariana Grande

October 24, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  America-hating nymphomaniac Bratz Doll Ariana Grande and Whorea The Explorer Selena Gomez are both united in the facts that they are each huge on social media, chart-topping singers, hot, emotionally screwed, and have been balls-deep dicked by skeezy dong. The... READ MORE

Who’d You Rather: Kylie Jenner Or Kim Kardashian. And Don’t You Look Away

October 17, 2018 | bikini | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Many of you are going to think you’re above choosing either Kylie Jenner or Kim Kardashian for this Who’d You Rather for the botched ages. And guess what. You probably are. But if you read this blog then I... READ MORE