Harry Potter Franchise Defends Depp

All men are no longer allowed to make mistakes and must be on their P’s and Q’s when it comes to their colleague’s T and A. read more

Feminists Posing as Potterheads Want Depp Banished

Johnny Depp is poised to have a significant role in the upcoming sequel to Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them as feminists posing as Harry Potter fans are insisting he be sacked. read more

Amber Heard No Longer Bisexual

The last thing I want to hear right before I de-pants my date at the end of the day is her disclosing that she’s unsure if she’s really into men or not. Believing that I would up for that kind of buffoonery will get you kicked out of whichever 2-star motel next to a... read more

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Lily James Smells Great and Shit Around the Web

Sexy stars in robes, boob tube nudity, and more! read more

Demi Lovato Accentuates Her Cleavage and Shit Around the Web

Hot girls smoking weed, Adrienne Bailon on vacation, and more! read more

Amber Heard Chaz Bono Back On

The thirty-one-year-old Heard is coming off of a complex relationship with the back of Johnny Depp's hand and might find security and stability in the arms of someone who looks like a potato. His billions can't hurt. The Tesla founder finds that although Heard is... read more

Amber Heard Loses Another Billionaire

When you're a billionaire, there are a billion reasons to break up. There's no limit in relationships when you can buy love and women. read more

Suing Your Reps Is Fraught With Peril

In Hollywood, your professional reps and personal assistants are like your family. So, only loyal to the dollar. Assume while you've been drinking most of your adult life, your esteemed ten-percenters have been sober and learning shit about you you wish were still... read more

Amber Heard Waterlogged Cleavage and Shit Around the Web

Gabrielle Caunesil, Petra Nemcova, and more! read more

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Amber Heard And Elon Musk Putting a Stamp On It

Amber Heard shared a photo of herself and Elon Musk, the alleged genius who's about to marry her and be half as much of a billionaire. It's possible to be super smart and socially retarded. It's also possible your company has a fantastic PR campaign behind you and you're... read more

Amber Heard Humble Hero

Amber Heard recalls a crazy day seven years ago when she took the plunge and told an Ellen show website interviewer that she was bisexual. Obviously the reporter was also gay, as was everybody else within eight nautical miles of Ellen's re-imagined Isle of Lesbos luxury... read more

Amber Heard and Johnny Depp Still Battling

When a lesbian you married on a pinot noir bender demands seven million to leave quietly, you have two choices. Only one is legal. read more