Anais Zanotti in a Bikini

Real life movements simply aren't possible when you know dudes with cameras are snapping you. You can't pick your nose or scratch your ass or adjust your junk. It's all about tossing the hair and moving like you want the king to pick you out among all the servant girls for his harem where the fruit is at least fresh after the forcible sodomy. Is it truly possible for a good looking woman in a thong bikini to ever have...

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Anais Zanotti And Tahiti Cora In Bikinis At The Beach In Miami

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News [gallery ids="1756017,1756018,1756019,1756020,1756021,1756022,1756023,1756024,1756025"]

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Anais Zanotti In A Pink Bikini

I'm going to go ahead and say pink is this French girl's color. I once had my color profile done at a mall. The girl shuddered as she told me I was black as death. Then she hurried away in tears screaming about Carcosa. That was awkward. If I could only find a partner like this chick who is both pink and has enormous tits, we could blend into something like a muddy brown and more subtly drive the people around us into...

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Anais Zanotti And Ana Braga Touch Each Other Like Broken Birds

These poor girls can't seem to find their tops. It's some kind of sickness that seems to befall international girls on the beach particularly dependent on the kindness of strangers to pay their rent. You might think it makes no sense to buy big ole titties only to keep them covered with the fingers your daddy used to kiss at bedtime when he promised you you'd be a ballerina in a beautiful hall he would build you from...

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Anais Zanotti In Not Even a Bikini

I'm starting to believe these Miami Beach pictures of models from various ports of worldwide naval call might be staged. These girls can't be standing staring out into the ocean with just a piece of floss wrapped around their ass for hours on end each day. Not when there's chicken wings to be served at their day jobs. This chick is French, so I'll concede she might be staring out into the great abyss during most of...

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Anais Zanotti In A Thong

I'm not sure what this girl's professional occupation is, but every time she pulls her thong out of her ass, I want to write her a check for $250 with a vaguely worded explanation in the memo line. Now that I think of it, I should probably use cash. Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News [gallery ids="1731190,1731188,1731189,1731191,1731192,1731193,1731194,1731195"]

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Give Me Back My Damn Bikini Top, You Venezuelean Whore

I might be reading into this. And I might be confusing Venezuela with Brazil. I think all of South America was like one piece in Risk. But there's still nothing finer than seeing two girls with with big fake yabbos and a poor command of the English language grabbing each others bikinis at the beach. Screw a basket full of kittens or babies in fireman's hats, this is where adorable begins and ends. Photo Credit:...

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Anais Zanotti in A Thong on Miami Beach

You can't do much better than a suntanning chick in a thong eating a banana at the beach. It really hits a number of marks. Competition along that particular shoreline is tough. You've got your models, your flight attendants, and your better looking community college girls all taking in the sun and you've got to stand out somehow. You're not going to get it done just by undoing your top. Enter the banana. Solid. Photo...

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Anais Zanotti And Ana Braga in Bikinis

Here's why this world is so fucking wonderful. Even good looking women need to figure out ways to get noticed if they want to be famous. Having a slamming bikini body and bit tits and long hair and designer sunglasses just isn't enough. It's enough to be my girlfriend who I let convince me that she's only friends with her fitness instructor. But it's not enough to book serious modeling gigs or be on TV. So these girls...

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Anais Zanotti Rollerblades In Booty Shorts

Hot shorts, rollerblades, and the giant baby sucker might be going one level too deep into cliches for self-described European model Anais Zanotti. Maybe she's been researching hot to make it in America. She's missing the red, white, and blue bikini top and the Grave Digger baseball hat. Then I'd give her citizenship. And all my money. Photo Credit: Splash [gallery...

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Anais Zanotti In A Bikini

Anais Zanotti is a self-described 'international model'. It's like being a 'contest winning writer'. I did exult her before for being allowed to take her clothes off for Playboy Romania. I guess that's not a huge compliment, though it's bigger than any I expect to receive in my lifetime. Plus she's wearing a bikini that my grandmother would've called 'slutty' if she were around to see it. Don't worry, grandma's not...

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Anais Zanotti And Tahiti Cora In Bikinis

I don't really know who these Miami models are. But their fake names sound really fucking exotic and Anais was once in Playboy Romania. Cracking the titty mags in the former Eastern Bloc -- that's when your absentee father steps out of the woodworks to claim you as his special little girl. Photo Credit: Splash [gallery ids="1391182,1391192,1391202,1391212,1391222,1391232,1391242,1391252,1391262,1391272,1391282"]

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Anais Zanotti In A Bikini

Photo Credit: Splash [gallery ids="1378412,1378422,1378432,1378442,1378452,1378462,1378472,1378482,1378492,1378502,1378512"]

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