Brad Pitt Has Softened

Watching the Brad Pitt of 2017 is like watching a player who stayed too long in the game. This guy was once your hero. Now he's broken and passed around by sailors in the boiler room who haven't seen a dame in three months.  read more

Alicia Vikander Feminist Lara Croft

The first official set pictures of Alicia Vikander as Lara Croft are here. Lara wears sensible cargo pants now, which means she’s a feminist. Or maybe she’s a lesbian. Guys who first jacked off to Lara’s cone tits in the original 1996 Tomb Raider game might prefer... read more

Angelina Jolie Eats A Tarantula

Angelina Jolie appears to be doing some image rehab since it became pretty obvious she was lying about Brad Pitt hitting his kid. She had zero concern involving her adopted brood into her own psychological turmoil in an effort to get back at her father.  read more

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Angelina Jolie's Pre-Cogged Mastectomy Cost Us All

Back in 2013, Angelina Jolie fired off an op-ed to the New York Times about the breast cancer gene in her family and her decision to mastectomy herself in advance of ever possibly coming up positive. Some time later she would speculatively cut out all of her female... read more

Angelina Jolie Master Plans

According to sources that keep ringing TMZ's ear, Angelina Jolie's master plan remains a move to England with her six United Colors of Benetton kids and an ultimate push for the Secretary General of the United Nations gig. She remains the only attractive women ever to be... read more

Angelina Jolie's Nanny Not Buying It

Angelina Jolie had a very traumatic childhood if you couldn't tell by the goth thing and fucking Billy Bob Thornton and hoarding children. Her mom and dad split up after he started banging a younger probably much more friendly woman when Jolie was three. read more

Melissa Etheridge Throws Shade At Angelina

You totally wish Melissa Etheridge was your drunk aunt. You've got to have a pretty good sense of humor to let your lesbian partner be shot up with David Crosby's jizz. Seriously, you could have picked just about anyone, why a walrus with drug genes? read more

Pitt-Jolie Children Traumatized

Nothing sucks worse than being adopted out of a war torn third world country only to end up in the killing fields of a Hollywood power couple divorce. Naturally, excluding bitter bloggers who mock children. Fuck them. read more

What the Fuck Has Happened to Men? A Brad Pitt Emasculation Saga

Brad Pitt is facing his wife's departure and accusations of screaming drunkenly at his teenaged son, what we used to call typical parenting, with all the backbone of a middle child barista. read more

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Angelina Gets Dirty

There aren't any solid arguments to justify marriage. Similar to the existence of god, it should be incumbent on believers to show evidence rather than place the onus on the detractors. Cavemen didn't marry cavewomen. This is a societal custom, and much like genital... read more

Jolie Preparing for War

Angelina Jolie is gearing up the war team. She really wants those multicultural bundle of kids. After hiring hardcore divorce attorney Laura Wasser in Los Angeles, Jolie has retained the not inexpensive services of Judy Smith, the fame D.C. crisis manager who's handled... read more

Brad Pitt Maybe Not Too Faithful

According to a report Angelina Jolie's friends wrote, Brad Pitt definitely had an affair with Marion Cotillard and having your healthy ovaries cut out is a fantastic idea. read more