Ariana Grande Dick Bike

Every song Ariana Grande sings is a metaphor for getting fucked until she can't walk. You'd think with that literary premise her audience might be men who want to fuck her until she can't walk. read more

Somebody Get Nonna A Freaking Cocktail (VIDEO)

Despite the occasional ham handed step into drive-by feminism, Ariana Grande largelysellsherself as awrithingfuck toy. It's not sexist. There are plenty of young guys making bank in rap and shitty pop music with the same middling IQ and cynical brandplan. read more

Ariana Grande Teasers Seem Obvious

Ariana Grande and her promotional team who can count are urging her fans to download and stream her new song Everyday as much as possible through Spotify. If they reach a certain milestone, Grande is promising the front end of the bell-curvers a lyric music video of... read more

Ariana Grande Is Having None of That Sexism

Ariana Grande suffered a sexist humiliation for the ages when a fan of her white rapper boyfriend approached the car with the two of them in it, told "Mac Miller" how amazing he was, and then checking out Ariana, said "Ariana is sexy as hell man, I see you, I see you... read more

Madonna's New Ass Seems a Tad Bulky (VIDEO)

Malawi is a special place for Madonna. It's the impoverished African nation where she's purchased between three and seven of her adopted children. You can never get those shiny beads back. read more

The Real Victim of the DNC Email Leaks

The DNC email leaks confirmed what most already knew -- people who work in national politics are wonky sinister losers who take themselves far too seriously. Also, they watch shitty movies and find Rachel Maddow attractive. Following the standard that the only thing... read more

Ariana Grande Selling Sex (VIDEO)

Ariana Grande's new album is chock full of songs about wanting to be touched and fucked and feel like a woman. I'm not sure she needs a whole album to make that happen. I know a bar. These are the musings of a young woman who grew up on a TV set and didn't get the chance... read more

2016 Grammy Awards the 49th Best Grammy Awards Ever

Grammy's music is akin to grabbing the iPod of a random teen girl chewing bubble gum and pressing shuffle play. You throw in a desperate attempt to feature every single black person in the recording industry into the mix and you have crappy Seacrest radio play music... read more

Ariana Grande Bio Hazard

Wolfee Donuts, the puke floored establishmentwhere Ariana Grande and her gender expansive boyfriend licked some donuts has failed a health inspection. Apparently authorities who peruse TMZ saw her donut licking video and busted the shop because you're not supposed to... read more

Ariana Grande Hates America (VIDEO)

Ariana Grande says she hatesAmerica. It could be easy to take her comments out of context:"I hate America, I hate Americans." Perhaps she's speaking ofher friend down the street, America America. Their family is known for starting armed conflicts, as well as barbecues... read more

Ariana Grande Licks Holes And Shit Around The Web

Minuscule diva Ariana Grande was spotted in a donut shop's security footage licking a bunch of donuts and then not buying them.If it's a fetish, I'm down with it, but I want to do it with you. OtherwiseI'm just getting the herp without any of the fun. Watch her lick the... read more

Ariana Grande Headlines All Star Game

The NBA has a firm grasp on its fan base. They've tapped a dwarfwho wears cat ears and appeals to modestly reformed pederasts on the loophole that she is technically an adult, all be it witha glaring hormone imbalance, to headline the All Star Game's Halftime Show. Her... read more