Christie Brinkley No Longer Cares

Christie Brinkley no longer cares what people think about her looks. As evidenced by her ceaseless amounts of plastic surgery and eleven hours with teams of dry wall spacklers preparing for public events. Or fucking John Mellencamp. read more

Christie Brinkley Isn't Aging, She's Geologically Forming

I don't know how fucking old Christie Brinkley is. But I'd ask her to keep her Methuselah hands hidden while you're banging her in bed. Does your pelvic bone normally crack like that? I'm stopping. My safe word is ew. Brinkley has been out promoting her book which shares... read more

Christie Brinkley Is 60

Is it normal for a sixty year old woman to make your genitals tingle? I thought sixty year old ladies knitted quilts and bakedtuna casserole. Christie Brinkley is filling out a bikini with her amplebreasts and partying in the tropics on a yacht with her nipples showing.... read more

A Lot Of Really Attractive People Are Still Celebrating The Swimsuit Issue

Sports Illustrated has been pulling out all of the stops to both promote and celebrate this year's swimsuit issue, because they consider this 50th anniversary issue to be a huge milestone. Is it a milestone because this magazine has thrived for so long despite the... read more

Christie Brinkley Is a Miracle

How is it that Christie Brinkley's plastic surgeons aren't winning some kinds of scientific awards in small European cities. There's always old dudes in black tie and hair coming out of their ears applauding some Czech doctor who cured lyme disease or some such trivial... read more

Christie Brinkley Spreads Her Legs for Money

Christie Brinkley still looks hot. I think she's 100 or something, but some combination of genetics and surgeries and dumping her last husband who was addicted to Internet porn has kept her looking like she's the mom every boy on the block wants to bang. Probably none of... read more

Christie Brinkley could use a little color

Christie Brinkley stopped to sign some autographs last night after seeing ‘Chicago' on Broadway, and it turns out she was recently in a science accident that turned her invisible and now she has to paint on a face of pure makeup so people can see her. Tyler Exclusive! ... read more


Christie Brinkley knows that old people are still human, right? They may eat food in disgusting combinations like catfish do, but they're sill from earth. So when she left her parents in a hot car in Beverly Hills yesterday, she probably didn't need to run around town... read more