Sad Looking Halloween Celebs

Halloween is supposed to be the happiest drunkest place on earth. But sometimes being young and beautiful and affording the expensivetampons just isn't enough. Aw, Petunia, you've got yourself a case of the miserables. It was hard not to notice how many chicks looked absolutely miserable at the Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party. Jessica Alba, buck the fuck up, you're a diaper billionaire with perfect tits. Suki...read more

Kelly Brook Needs a Better Show

Ellen's produced sitcom about a super hot blond lesbian chick making a baby with her supportive straight guy friend isn't doing well with critics outside of those in Hollywood who fear for their working lives. You talk shit about Ellen in the Thirty Mile Zone, you might as well take your own life in the tub like the defeated Roman generals. The show will continue on given nobody has the balls to face Ellen across her...read more

Lesbians Are the New Lesbians

Ellen Degeneres produced a TV show and picked the random category of lesbian as the subject matter. It's Elisha Cuthbert as a hot stacked lesbian the way lesbians dream lesbians look but only really exist to be married to crazy rich lesbians like Ellen. Everybody else gets Janeane Garofalo. I know she's not gay, but you get what I'm saying. A very small number of women are hogging all the good lesbians. The show...read more

Elisha Cuthbert Happy Endings Out in the Desert

If Elisha Cuthbert isn't in your tug vault, then it's time for a banking audit. So fucking hot. As she was back in 24 as the teen with the boobs that were always in trouble, to turning boys into men in The Girl Next Door to being the hottest sloppy seconds Canadian hockey fan ever. And in these new photos of her shooting out in the desert. Yeah, somebody spent a lot of time with makeup and hair to try and make her...read more

afternoon headlines

NO STRINGS ATTACHED - was the only new movie in theaters this week, and it made 20 million to win a very slow weekend box office. So finally we've discovered that people will watch an Ashton Kutcher movie, as long as they have nothing else to choose from. (box office mojo) SKINS - has lost two more sponsors, Subway and Schick, citing concerns that the show may be child pornography. Jersey Shore went through this same...read more

elisha cutbert is disapointing

Elisha Cuthbert is in Hawaii this week, just like the last few times she's been on Tyler. The difference being, this time she's put on like five hundred pounds and looks like hell. Also she seems to be alone this time. That's not coincidence. She's probably only there because she dropped a slice of pizza last time, and it suddenly just occurred to her where she last saw it. (source = splash news online) [gallery...

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ELISHA CUTHBERT IS "SLOPPY SECONDS"

Elisha Cuthbert is now on her third NHL boyfriend. She currently dates Calgary Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf (that’s them in Hawaii last May), but before that she dated Dallas left-winger Sean Avery and then Montreal Canadiens' defenseman Mike Komisarek. It's hard to believe she ever broke up with Avery because he seems just delightful, a real heart of gold. Yahoo says...Reporters were waiting to speak with Avery...

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THE GQ MAN OF THE YEAR AWARDS

Summer Glau would probably be the best-looking woman in the room on most occasions, but she learned a valuable lesson last night (as did Elisha Cuthbert, Sarah Shahi, Olivia Wilde, Linda Cardellini, Amber Valletta and every other woman on earth): Don’t go anywhere where Megan Fox will be, because she’s way way better looking than you and no one will even notice you’re there. Megan Fox is so impossibly hot, I would go...

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THIS IS DISAPPOINTING

Elisha Cuthbert and dopey boyfriend Dion Phaneuf are still in Hawaii but these pictures from day 2 are more than a little disappointing. She’s only 25 but her ass is a mess. This of course means she will never get to know the pleasure of my love. I can't have sex with anything less than a 10+. if I mate with mere mortals, I lose my powers.(picture source = splash news online) [gallery id="471"]

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OKAY SO IT IS DION PHANEUF

So according to 1800 emails from sexy readers, Dion Phaneuf is not playing hockey for Team Canada right now and so it probably is him in Hawaii with Elisha Cuthbert. But the most awesome email came from asourcewho I heart and they said Elisha went backstage at a Fall Out Boy concert one night when she was dating New York Ranger Sean Avery. Elisha was on the prowl, and looking to fuck Pete Wentz. Wentz told her he had a...

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ELISHA CUTHBERT IS A NHL WHORE - UPDATE

Elisha Cuthbert is in Hawaii this week with her new boyfriend, Dion Phaneuf, a defencemen for the Calgary Flames. He is not to be confused with Elisha's last two boyfriends; Sean Avery of the New York Rangers or Mike Komisarek of the Montreal Canadians. The Sun UK says...The athletic pair couldn't keep their hands off each other as they splashed around in the warm waters of Hawaii.An onlooker said: "It's not hard to...

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THESE TWO WERE MAKING OUT

Us magazine says that Paris Hilton and Elisha Cuthbert were making out with each other at a bar in New York City Tuesday night. Us says:Paris Hilton and Elisha Vuthbert were "all over each other and making out" at New York's Tenjune club Tuesday night. Hilton, 26, and Cuthbert, 25 (who costarred in 2005's House of Wax), didn't arrive at Tenjune together. Hilton was there for a birthday party and was seen dancing on...

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ELISHA CUTHBERT IS CONFUSING

These pictures are a real bee in my bonnet, and I'm sorry to use such harsh language, but I'm pretty upset. WTF happened to Elisha Cuthbert? She used to be kinda super hot, now she look's all dumpy and unkempt and has those stupid sunglasses on like shes in the World Series of Poker. I don't even know what she does anymore. I guess she enjoys photography. I enjoy making sandwiches for the homeless, and then eating...

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ELISHA CUTHBERT IS BANNED

The Hollywood Reporter says today that the advertising campaign for the movie "Captivity" will be scrapped today because of a barrage of objections to the images, which appear to show star Elisha Cuthbert being tortured and killed. The campaign, mainly billboards in Los Angeles and taxicab tops in New York, will be taken down today by 2:00pm. The Reporter says:The billboards, first posted March 13, feature four frames...

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HALLOWEEN IS SCARY

It took 70,000 tries, but for the first time ever, in that top picture only, Paris Hilton doesn't look like a complete monster. And that's pretty much the nicest thing I've ever had to say about her. Thanks to Rachel Weis, Paris didn't even have the laziest costume of the night. It should probably give you pause if you pick your Halloween costume out of your closet, from the stuff you normally wear. It barely even...

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