Ellen DeGeneres Tied in PC Knots

In a world of universal oppression, even the righteous among us will be wiped with the broad brush of patriarchy, bigotry, and hate speech. Ellen DeGeneres hasn't uttered an offensive word in fifteen years of banal afternoon television. She donates to the right charities,... read more

Kris Jenner Struggles

There can't be anything more tortured than Kris Jenner talking to Ellen about Bruce Jenner turning into Caitlyn Jenner and dating men. Bruce Jenner has gone to more extreme lengths to cover up the fact that he loved the man cock than any other male born on this planet.... read more

Ellen Brings Down the Hammer

Dolce & Gabbana took another hit from the gay community when Ellen lambasted the unambiguously gay duo for making comments in an Italian magazine about in-vitro fertilization being as awful as pairing beige slacks with a taupe sweater. In a quirk of expectations, the... read more

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Kelly Brook Needs a Better Show

Ellen's produced sitcom about a super hot blond lesbian chick making a baby with her supportive straight guy friend isn't doing well with critics outside of those in Hollywood who fear for their working lives. You talk shit about Ellen in the Thirty Mile Zone, you might... read more

Ellen's Comedy Gold Fucks with the NYPD (VIDEO)

Here's a pop quiz.Is now a good time to be fucking with the the NYPD? Your answer really depends on how much you look forward topeeringdown on theprotest march in your honor from heaven. Alexander Bok is a dude whose shtick is creeping up behind people and dancing then... read more

Portia de Rossi Loves to Skywrite

Portia de Rossi's go to gifts for Ellen are either skywriting messages or that special thing she does with her tongue and ring finger that drives her old lady wild. She can do both while pretty deeply intoxicated. Amid rumors of a marriage reminiscent of Ike and Tina... read more

Portia De Rossi Faded On Ellen Vag

Ellen's vagina is the psychoactive toad of lesbian Hollywood. It made Anne Heche crazy, well, more crazy. Portia de Rossi is now experiencing the long term effects of having her face directed between her older wife's pant-suited thighs and told to help mama relax. Portia... read more

Mila Kunis Won't Reveal Anything About The Douchebaby (VIDEO)

Mila Kunis knows the gender of the baby that she's currently expecting with Ashton Kutcher, and she also has a name picked out, but she won't reveal any of those details because it's none of our business or something. After all, her whole relationship with Ashton had... read more

Ellen Page and Ellen DeGeneres Out Out Each Other (VIDEO)

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player Ellen DeGeneres invited Ellen Page on her show to tell how how brave she was for her coming out publicly as a lesbian to the big annual coming out publicly as a lesbian gathering in Los Angeles earlier this year.... read more

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Ellen DeGeneres Hates the T's in LGBT

Oscar host Ellen DeGeneres is catching a shitload of flack from the transgender community for the only funny joke she made all night at The Oscars, pointing out that Liza Minnelli looks like a dude playing Liza Minnelli: "Hello to the best Liza Minnelli impersonator I've... read more

Ellen Degeneres To Host the 2014 Oscars

The Oscars pick their host these days like my friend Jeff finds women. He gets super loaded and makes a lot of bad decisions. I'm not sure how many beers it takes before you fall in love with Ellen, I think for Portia de Rossi it took about fifty million dollars worth.... read more

At Ellen's New Mansion, The Carpets Do Match The Drapes (And You're Eating Both If You Want to Move In)

There was this guy in my circle of friends, he used to hang out at the bars, get lucky with the ladies every now and then, until one day up and told everybody he was moving in with some older man. He declared himself gay, packed his few material goods, and moved into... read more