Gisele Bundchen Still Earning

If you ever had a hint of being rich, sell women's clothing. It's the biggest legal market out there not involving digging deep into the earth's mantle. Unless you've got a big fucking shovel, sell pants to chicks. read more

Gisele Bundchen Topless for $700

The line starts behind me for Gisele Bundchen's 20th anniversary photo memoirs. The Brazilian model retired from runway modeling earlier this year though continues to pose for pay for magazines, advertisements, and that earnest sounding guy on Craigslist who can only... read more

Gisele Bundchen Recovers From Tit Job

Gisele Bundchen wore a burqa to disguise herself while getting new tits in Paris, which was a dead giveaway because her exposed ankles said Brazilian whore all the way. She also got her eyes done and most likely mused on having Nazi parents with the surgeon played by... read more

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Gisele Bundchen Finds Solace

Following her husband smashing his cellphone with a sledgehammer and then smirking about it while playing the victim, Gisele pretended to do yoga with her "Soul sister" on Instagram. The problem with fulling lesbianingout is you have to be buzzed and only half the party... read more

Gisele Bundchen And Tom Brady Vacation Like You and Me

Gisele and Tom Brady own a solid chunk of Coastal Central America now. They orange oiled out all the annoying monkeys so their childcare staff would be safe from rabies. They might also be re-animating fossilized dinosaur bones. You can do stupid shit when you're filthy... read more

Gisele Bundchen Grateful

Gisele Bundchen posted a photo of herself looking svelte with the words "Grateful" written in the sand by a professional. This is thought to be in reference to her impending retirement from modeling. Bundchen will celebrate withan extra rice cake and a toast of Fen Phen... read more

Gisele Bundchen Is Discreet

Gisele earned $47 million last year according to Forbes and is annoyed they wrote an article about it. She attempted to vaguely minimize the details of the story: "It's sad, because the people who write these things don't have my bank account details." What's in your... read more

Gisele Bundchen Naked and Powerful

Gisele Bundchen made Forbes list of the world's most powerful women. I'm not sure what the voting criteria is, but it's safe to say this is a list that means you're the premium blend. You're riding in the same VIP car with Hilary Clinton, Ellen DeGeneres, and Oprah. If... read more

Gisele Bundchen Models Bikinis For 2014 H&M

Photo Credit: H&M [gallery id="3969"] read more

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Gisele Bundchen Flashes Underboob In Issue 1 Of Porter Magazine

Photo Credit: Porter [gallery id="4316"] read more

Holly Madison Thinks Gisele is So Brave

You probably forgot that Holly Madison had a baby earlier this year, because it wasn't even in the Top 100 celebrity child births in 2013, but she did and now she knows just what Gisele Bündchen is going through when it comes to finding the time and right place to breast... read more

Gisele Bündchen Feeds a Child From Her Teat Then Models Lingerie

Holy crap, Gisele really does do it all. She maps out post patterns for Danny Amendola so he's not lost like that stupid Wes Welker. She runs a lingerie business selling lingerie that only she can wear. And she takes in random street children to give them breast milk... read more