Kristen Bell Is Depressed

Just when you thought the politically perfect Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell life partnership was the stuff of Sears sweater commercial, they pivot right into mental illness confessions. A couple weeks ago Shepard confided in the world that a neighbor kid once stuck his hand down Shepard's pants when he was seven. Shepard thought that made him gay. But it turned out he only looked super gay.

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Dax Shepherd Molested Also

Dax Shepard spoke publicly about being molested by a neighbor teen boy when he was seven. Shepard claims he kept the experience private for the next eleven years wondering if he had emittedsecret gay signals that led to his fondling. It's not a theory without some merit. Look at that face. It's beaming something out there. Shepard's mother was a foster care children's advocate which is entirely a coincidence to...

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Kristen Bell Did Something

Cosmopolitanposted an article to alert the world that actress Kristen Bell started an Instagram account. Bell's first post was a picture of her and husband Dax Shepard pretending they like to kiss members of the opposite sex on the lips.Bloggingfrom her Soul Cycle seat mount, Cosmo's pre-menstrual authornailed the feeling we all have viewing this photo: It's worthy of at least 250 heart eye emojis Heart eye emojis are...

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Jenna Dewan Tatum and Minnie Driver Are Almost Naked

I don't know who else is in here. Damn, I want to be Photoshopped like Minnie Driver. I could be a god. You can't even see her brown tooth or that plate of St. Louis style ribs she ate in '98 that stuck around her hips. Sorry, Minnie, please don't quit Twitter again. There's Channing Tatum's wife. She looks good. Let's be honest, we all thought he was gay. Nia Long, she's in all those movies I don't go to see because...

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Kristen Bell Topless And Covered In The May 2014 Issue Of Allure

Photo Credit: Allure [gallery ids="1739159,1739158"]

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Kristen Bell Knows Stuff

Some people might say that a Hollywood actress who pays a fat woman to wipe sand off her belly might be out of touch with the common folk. But Kristen Bell and her consecrated vegan life traveler baby daddy have made it their mission to school people on the virtuous life. The pair have sacrificed their own happiness for minutes at a time so that others might take unto their teachings. Before Kristen and Dax, people...

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Kristen Bell Has Nice Vegan Panties

I prefer to see Kristen Bell without Dax Shepherd. He makes me feel uncomfortable, like he's with a woman too good for him and we all know it. I also don't want a dude around when his wife is flashing her panties to hawk her merch. That's an intimate moment between buyer and sell that the presence of a surly husband can easily ruin. They may not actually be married, I can't remember all the self-important fuss they...read more

Kristen Bell Marries Dax Shepard

It's official. The outspokenly politically correct couple Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard finally tied the knot. You may recall that these two sanctimonious vegetarians publicly stated that they would not get married until all their gay and lesbian friends had a similar ability to do so. Of course, that didn't stop them from creating a child earlier this year, which if my sex-ed memory serves me, their gay and lesbian...

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Kristen Bell and Dax Shepherd Finally Free to Marry

If you're already married, you're not as good a person as Kristen Bell and Dax Shepherd. The newly named Sexiest Celebrity Vegetarians badly wanted to express their undying affection for one another and validate their powerful baby-producing lovemaking with the ritual of marriage. But they would not allow themselves such a privilege when gay men and women across this land were denied the same right. So, they...

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Kristen Bell in a bikini is riveting

Kristen Bell was in Miami this weekend, and sure you could skip these pictures, but when you have a flat chested generic blond who never changes her joyless expression in a frumpy bikini, why would you want to? (image source = inf daily) [gallery ids="769701,769711,769721,769722,769732,769742,769752,769762,769772,769782,769792,769802"]

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monday afternoon headlines

KRISTEN BELL - is engaged, and I'll tell you who the lucky fella is when we come back. And we're back: Dax Shepard. (wonderwall) SCIENTOLOGY - is profiteering in Haiti. "Yeah, no wonder Travolta was over there, haha," Brendon said to buy time while he looked up if "profiteering" was good or bad. (gawker) KATY PERRY - might have a "clothing optional" wedding, which is to say she might be naked. I can't wait to find out...read more

this is more like it

Kristen Bell and Malin Akerman walked the red carpet last night for the premiere of 'Couples Retreat', which is good news for me because I've had a crush on Kristen ever since 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall'. It might be time to make my move. I finally have a plan in place to impress her. How? Simple. Kill … the Batman. Wait. Wait no that's for something else. Aww god dammit. I don't have a plan at all, do I? (hq jump ...

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KRISTEN BELL IS ALL STRETCHY

Today is boring, so here are pictures of Kristen Bells ass. It’s about time they made a movie about this. This is her filming a scene yesterday in Central Park for a movie called 'When In Rome', co-starring Will Arnett (not pictured). I don’t know what that movie is about, but I’m guessing the theme is, Things That Are Awesome. Because Will Arnett is cool and funny and Kristen Bell is short and little. Chicks like that...

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KRISTEN BELL IS A HUGE STAR

I'm not gonna lie to you, I've seen better ideas than to put Kristen Bell in a bikini. And Paddington's hat. I'm sure this would be the hottest scene of 1953, but relative to other stuff on TV, this is boring. Although, to be fair, I'm not entirely sure who this chick is, so I guess you could say I'm not impressed. These pictures are her on the set of "Heroes", which is another show I know nothing about. From what I...

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