Lindsay Lohan Backs Trump and Islam

Lindsay Lohan comes from with a message of peace. Allahu Akbar. Lohan's been studying the sacred text as she Lord Jim's her way ever Eastward escaping humiliating events and landlords of her past. read more

Lindsay Lohan Maybe Turning Muslim

Rumors are going around that Lindsay Lohan may have converted to Islam, although she's probably just trying to marry one of the several rich Arab guys she's fucking. read more

Lindsay Lohan Refugee Plight

Lindsay Lohan has been banging some Turkish dude who is paying her and in the process hitting up a bunch of refugee camps to fill some sort of void. Unfortunately she's still talking. read more

Lindsay Does Dubai

Lindsay Lohan has made Dubai her new home. It was hard for her to officially leave England, until the eviction notices from the apartment her previous boyfriend was paying on her behalf started being taped to her door. read more

Lindsay Lohan Shockingly Only 30

Lindsay Lohan is officially the youngest cougar on earth. It's almost like in porn where they only have teens and milfs. Certainly there should be an in between but apparently not. You just leap from one to the other. read more

Lindsay Lohan Forgets Christmas

Here's something to consider when apologizing to a town in London where you forgot to show up to light the central square Christmas tree, don't send your apologies in an Instagram video from Bali. read more

Lindsay Lohan Debuts Her New Accent (VIDEO)

Thirty seems like a good age to re-invent yourself. Many people would consider giving up excessive drinking or abusive relationships or even resolving to find a job. Lindsay Lohan chose a new accent. read more

Lindsay Lohan Struggling With Donald Trump's Rude Comments from 2004

The latest craze for women is to struggle with bad jokes made about them long ago by Donald Trump. In recently discovered Howard Stern tapes from 2004, discovered by way of Howard Stern's people pulling together clip compilations of Trump interviews on their show, read more

Lindsay Lohan Goes Muslim

For unknown reasons Lindsay Lohan has become passionate about the Syrian refugee crisis, probably to get attention. She was in a Turkish camp wearing a hijab and shooting the shit with the huddled masses, even dawning a medical coat to 'assist with pediatric medical... read more

Lindsay Lohan Severs Her Ring Finger

There are numerous reasons why one might lose their ring finger. Gollum attack comes to mind. Pissed off ex-fiancee wanting the rock back he bought you on his father's Amex black is another. read more

Lindsay Lohan Sells Her Soul to Turkey

Lindsay Lohan signed away her publicity rights in Turkey to a made-up company with zero Google search results for the sum of two million dollars. read more

Lindsay Lohan Was Beaten

Lindsay Lohan spoke about her time banging Russian trust fund douche Egor Tarabasov, and has now revealed that he physically abused her. You should really never blame the victim. Yet sometimes it's helpful to question whether the victim is actually a victim, or if someone... read more