Nicole Kidman Nippy In The Desert And Shit Around The Web

Nicole Kidman has made a shit ton of movies you've never heard of or seen but that feature her super big nipples in some state of excitement on camera. This is why white people win all the Oscars. Talk about pretty in pink. (Egotastic All-Stars) Jennifer Bambi Martinez wears an arm bra and little else. (Last Men On Earth) Gisele Bundchen could do better than that homunculus neanderthal Tom Brady. (TMZ) Jenny Mollen...

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Scientologists Really Really Angry

A new documentary called Going Clear is being roundly applauded at the Sundance Film Festival which likely means it's cloying and unwatchable. It spills a bunch of beans about Scientology like how they abuse children and subvert labor laws andhypothesizes Nicole Kidman left Tom Cruise because he was way too into the Churchalthough it doesn't mention his love of the cock. The Church of Scientology is super pissed at...

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China Eats American

When it's time to dial up Americana for your big Chinese golf tournament, your party invite plan immediately moves to Morgan Freeman, Chris Evans, and Kenny G. That's God, Captain America, and a fey alto sax player to make the lingering Communist propagandists happy in their mockery of the U.S. You also invite Jessica Alba because half a billion dudes in China want to bang her too. I can't imagine how much cash it...

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Nicole Kidman Chesty At The Celebrate Life Ball In Melbourne

Photo Credit: Getty [gallery id="3517"]

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Nicole Kidman Knocked Over By Paparazzi On A Bike

Natural redhead Nicole Kidman is pressing charges against paparazzo Carl Wu after he knocked her on her Aussie ass during Fashion Week. The photographer was trying to take pictures when he lost control of his bike and crashed into the tallest of Tom Cruise's former beard. She isn't hurt but she's going to press charges anyway, which is what Wu deserves for not knowing that you don't ride bikes on the sidewalk and...

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Last Night Was The Oscars, Here Are The Boobs That Showed Up

Last night was The 85th Annual Academy Awards and I'm completely ashamed to say I watched the entire thing. To sum it up, Seth MacFarlane did surprisingly not shitty, Jennifer Lawrence fell down, the Best Director winner was bullshit, Ben Affleck got snubbed, then didn't and George Clooney kept getting free scotch thrown at him for smiling every time someone joked he banged and/or will bang somebody like nine-year-old...read more

Nicole Kidman is spooky

The Four Seasons hotel in Beverly Hills should probably let their guests know Nicole Kidman is staying there. I'm not brave, and she's zombie white, so if I saw her walking the halls at night I would seriously freak the fuck out. "What do you want from me spirit, why have you not moved on!" (image source = fame/flynet) [gallery id="6400"]

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this is supposed to be Nicole Kidman

Nicole Kidman looked like she should be sitting on a ventriloquists knee 5 days ago at the US Open, but according to V magazine she's actually an immortal 19-year-old with a rock hard ass and no pores. "Hello 9-1-1? I ran at Nicole Kidman with a wooden stake but she turned into a bat and flew away, and now I don't know where she went. Yeah I'm pretty freaked out." [gallery...

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Nicole Kidman forgot something

Nicole Kidman went to a screening of her movie 'Paperboy' at Cannes last night wearing a dress that also acted as a thermometer. So be grateful it's not Khloe Kardashian wearing it, because then we'd have to see her dick. Or dicks, whatever the case may be. She has to have at least one. (image source = wenn, bauer-griffin) [gallery id="6804"]

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Nicole Kidman pee'd on Zac Efrons face and chest

Nicole Kidman plays a white trash slut so well in 'the Paperboy' that they might as well have called it 'the Dina Lohan Story', especially since they'll both be remembered for the awful thing that came out of their vaginas. As the Huffingtom Post says... "The Paperboy" debuted at the Cannes Film Festival on Thursday, and Lee Daniels' "Precious" follow-up provided attendees with the chance to watch Nicole Kidman...

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can you even tell who this is?

This very famous actress arrived at the airport in Nice today on her way to the Cannes Film Festival, but who is it? Is it the ghost of Shelly Long? Does Taylor Swift have progeria? I'll give you a hint: it's Nicole Kidman. Did that help? Have you figured out who this is? I've been staring at it for 5 minutes and I'm still not certain that I have. (image source = fame/flynet) [gallery id="6819"]

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Isabella Cruise covered for absentee mom Nicole Kidman

Kids, especially adopted kids, are at their most confident and secure in their early teens. They're fearless pillars of strength who embrace every setback as an exciting new challenge. That's why it's really no big deal that Nicole Kidman bailed on the two kids she adopted with Tom Cruise. In fact she hasn't been photographed with her daughter Isabella, 19, or her son Conner, 17, in over 5 years. Luckily for her,...

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Nicole Kidman is spooky

Nicole Kidman went to lunch at Joans on Third in LA today, and when she arrived she had the whole place to herself. Not because she's famous, but because she looks like the ghost of a murdered 60's Barbie, and ghosts are very scary. (image source = pacific coast) [gallery ids="974781,974782,974791,974792,974801,974811,974812,974821"]

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Nicole Kidman has a new baby

In a rare example of someone in Hollywood being able to keep a secret (though in this case its probably because no one cared to ask) Nicole Kidman and her husband Keith Urban, both 43, announced on Monday that they're proud new parents of a baby girl named Faith Margret, born through a surrogate in Nashville on December 28th. Nicole says... "I'm so pale and bony, people often mistake me for a ghost." No not really....

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Nicole Kidman admits having botox

Nicole Kidman has finally confessed to have tried Botox, and by "tried" she must mean with every meal since 2005. People says... "I've tried a lot of things, but aside from sports and good nutrition, most things don't make a difference," Kidman, 43, (says). "I have also tried Botox." But Kidman says she didn't like using the injections, which are known to tighten up a patient's face to avoid the appearance of...

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