Nicole Richie Seems Composed

Nicole Richie celebrated the replacement of her last natural body part over the weekend with a fancy no-food party at Bloomingdales. It saddens me that women ever feel the need scalpel and inject and Scented Magic Marker themselves into unrecognizable collagen sculptures. Not the ugly ones obviously. You're going to want to head to the Peruvian jungle clinic for that illegal face transplant. But Nicole Richie wasn't a...

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Katy Perry Is Just Full Of Crazy Ideas

Just when you think that Katy Perry is completely out of ways to prove how zany and unique she is, she does something that just blows our minds. Last night, she joined Nicole Richie and others in supporting Marianne Williamson, an independent candidate for Congress, at an event in Los Angeles, and Katy stole the show with her amazing green hair. People must have freaked out when they saw her hair and asked her, "How...

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Art Basel Is the Perfect Place to Feel Important

Art Basel is the new annual celebrity proving ground for sophistication credentials. It's in Miami which means the beach and the better cocaine, so it's kind of the perfect place for Hollywood intelligentsia to head in December to prove their more enlightened than everybody who used to go to Aspen and wear fur in between attending PETA protests. If you're like Nicole Richie and your dad sold you into fancy living,...

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Nicole Richie In A See Through Top At A Beach Party In Malibu

Photo Credit: FameFlynet [gallery id="5241"]

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Nicole Richie In A Gold Bikini

If you ran a Body Mass Index on Nicole Richie, it would come back with a score of 'eat some fucking food already'. I say that lovingly. I don't want to see somebody claimed by anorexia and then I become like my aunt who tells the Karen Carpenter story over and over again. None of Nicole's works have ever touched me like Interplanetary Craft apparently did my aunt. I'd have to fake it and talk glowingly to the next...

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Nicole Richie Weighs Less Than You Think, If You're Thinking 100 Lbs

Nicole Richie, whoever sunk your battleship and made you stop eating, just let it go. You're married, you've got kids. This is the time to pack on a few fat rings. I'm sorry your dad sold you to Lionel Richie for six bucks and a bus transfer. Eat a god damn sandwich already. You're scaring people. Photo Credit: FameFlynet, INFphoto.com, PCN [gallery id="5467"]

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Nicole Richie's Boobs Look Like a Magnet

Blurry Nicole Richie is kind of hot. If I could keep her a little out of focus, maybe bring up the NFL on Fox bumper music every time she said something stupid about skin care or her gays. That Nicole Richie could be my girlfriend. We'd have to do something with the kid though. Or whatever she's done with it already, keep doing that. Photo Credit: AKM-GSI [gallery id="5486"]

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How Are You Not Watching Nicole Richie on AOL?

Don't let it be because you haven't had an AOL account since your last free trial disk ran out of hours in 1998. You are truly missing one special bit of Twitter inspired reality television programming. Like the latest episode: Nicole Richie visits her hairstylist Andy Lecompte, one of Los Angeles' most famed hairstylists. Nicole proves her unexpected hairdresser skills when she advises one of Andy's clients on how to...

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Nicole Richie Gets Candid, You Get Educated

If you're like me, then you too have been wondering how the hell you can get a little more Nicole Richie in your life. Our wait is over, my friend. #CandidlyNicole is here. The web show based on the uproarious Nicole Richie Twitter feed. It was only a matter of time before social medial content was adapted for use in something really really close to social media. And Nicole has shit to say. Important shit. Like in the...

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Nicole Richie Has Cleaned Up Boobs

I'm not sure what Nicole Richie does, but since she stopped snorting so much blow with her former 'school' friend Paris Hilton, she seems to be much more put together when doing it. I guess you only have so many rails in your life before you realize it's time to either commit yourself to the drug addicted rich party girl lifestyle filled with a vacuous commitment to club music and Valtrex, or commit yourself to what...

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since when does Nicole Richie look good in a bikini?

I have no idea when this happened, but Nicole Richie actually exceeded all expectations yesterday at a hotel pool on South Beach. The girl put on about 15 pounds, and for the first and last time ever, I'm saying that as a compliment. Is she still ugly? Yes. And how. But she looks good for Nicole Richie. You have to lower your expectations. Criticizing her here would be like when Mr. Burns read, "It was the best of...

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I think Im in love

Nicole Richie was in Miami yesterday, in a bikini at her hotels pool, and the bad news is her entire body. It's every bit as unpleasant and androgynous as you remember it being. The good news is her face. Because she looks like a cartoon chicken, and cartoons are funny, so that's maybe the nicest thing I've ever said about her. (image source = splash news) [gallery ids="781292,781302,781312,781321,781331,781341"]

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afternoon headlines

WILL FERRELL - is the most overpaid star in Hollywood when looking at what he costs to hire compared to what his movies make at the box office. Ewan McGregor, Billy Bob Thornton, Eddie Murphy and Ice Cube round out the top 5. Which means I either misread something or Hollywood casts movies by randomly picking names out of a hat. (forbes) NICOLE RICHIE - has checked into Cedars-Sinai hospital in LA for pneumonia. Did...

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monday afternoon headlines

DAVID LETTERMAN - is denying a report in the Enquirer that his wife has thrown him out of the house as a result of the affairs he admitted to last month. If she does try to kick him out, he should give her a book about Scott Peterson. Remind her what's up. (wonderwall) NICOLE RICHIE - is married to Joel Madden, and has been for some time although no one knew it until today. Probably because no one gives a shit. (...

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morning headlines

The Thursday morning headlines are hosted by this sexy ass German guy who shuffles around in a circle for over 5 minutes to ‘Sunshine' by alex M.O.R.P.H. At the 3 minute mark, just when you think things are starting to cool down, the music kicks back up and his hot moves go right along with it. I actually went and bought some panties just so I could throw them at the screen as I squealed with delight. BRAD PITT –...

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