Sad Looking Halloween Celebs

Halloween is supposed to be the happiest drunkest place on earth. But sometimes being young and beautiful and affording the expensivetampons just isn't enough. Aw, Petunia, you've got yourself a case of the miserables. It was hard not to notice how many chicks looked absolutely miserable at the Casamigos Tequila Halloween Party. Jessica Alba, buck the fuck up, you're a diaper billionaire with perfect tits. Suki...read more

Cara Delevingne Just Eye Fucked Your Woman

This voracious lesbian vampire is using commercial media to lure in her winding waiting line of snatches. She's goddamn unstoppable. Guys love to say they'd be a lesbian if they were a chick because it sounds incredibly less gay on the back end of an opening of 'if I were a woman'. As tough as you have it as a man finding women, imagine the playing field when only some relatively small percentage of chicks will even...

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Suki Waterhouse Milking It

British model Suki Waterhouse, who is 23 but can easily play teens, though not low enough for Bradley Cooper who just dumped her, threw a theme party for her and her friends where they dressed like characters fromthe90's film Clueless. Everyone needs an excuse to tribute a film that came out when they were two. Waterhouse likes to advertise herself as nubile. I'm sure the girl gang had a ton of fun explaining what...

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Cara Delevingne Squeezes Between Suki and Georgia

This Delevingne chick is moving fast. We concede any more women to this carpet munching Nosferatu and there will be none left to dance around the maypole. Bradley Cooper, this is your barely legal girlfriend. Mick Jagger, inexplicably this is your daughter. Tainted for eternity by the love whose name we dare not speak. Delevingne's stevedored more vagina grease this past week than most men garner in a lifetime. Decent...

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Bradley Cooper Likes Them Not Quite Ripe

Bradley Cooper's girlfriend Suki Waterhouse is 22 years old butlooks like a foster care tween who's seen some things. Cooper is coming in at forty, so based on the numbersthis isn't atypical when the dude is loaded. When guysare accused of statutory rape they inevitably drop the "But she looked 18!" line. By that reasoning, I'd find it creepy if a forty year old dude was banging a chick of agewho didn't look it. Seems...

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Bradley Cooper's Teen Girlfriend Seems Fun

I'm pretty sure Bradley Cooper paid some desk clerk at the Hague to change this chick's birth certificate to read eighteen so he won't get flagged by Interpol. If you love young girls, that's a trouble worth going to. You don't want to end up as a wanted man on the back of suspiciously non-refrigerated milk cartons. Bradley Cooper would not do well in prison. Suki Waterhouse is a professionally paid runway model,...

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Suki Waterhouse In A Retro Bikini In Brazil

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI [gallery ids="1758027,1758028,1758029,1758016,1758018,1758020,1758021,1758022,1758023"]

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Bradley Cooper's Girlfriend Secured Aboard the Lesbian Flagship

Cara Delevingne invited Bradley Cooper's middle school aged girlfriend, Suki Waterhouse, to spend a couple days on her yacht off the coast of Spain. You might recall this sea-faring vessel as the place where Selena Gomez was indoctrinated to the magic of another woman lapping at her vagina like a hungry kitty to a saucer of milk. There's nothing wrong with girl on girl sex so long as it doesn't involve Rosie...

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Suki Waterhouse Flashes Her Panties

You know it's a slow day when you're staring at Bradley Cooper's young girlfriend's panties. He's banging her so I assume she's eighteen. When has anybody ever got into trouble just assuming a girl is eighteen? Many people are calling Bradley Cooper out for dating such a young girl. Women are insinuating that Cooper lacks the confidence and courage to date women who are every bit his equal. And that he's looking for a...

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