Jamie King and Victoria Beckham Featuring Gaunt Look This Spring

It's possible we spend too much time focusing on the plus sized models being media restructured as body positive and not enough time on those likely to be buried even sooner. Our malnourished class of street urchins and deeply bitter Brentwood celebrity models. read more

David Beckham Really Wants to Be a Knight

Occasionally clever British tabloid reporters came up with the name 'Beckileaks' to describethe release of emailshacked from the server of a global sports management company closely tied to David Beckham. The hackers released correspondencesbetween Beckham and his public... read more

Victoria Beckham Pens a Letter to Her 18-Year Old Self

Women's magazines are fond of the literary conceit where vapid older celebrities write advice letters to their younger celebrity self. It's a conspicuously inane exercise for women who spend hours a day discussing shoes. Also, Kobe Bryant. read more

Victoria Beckham Lonelier Than Usual

Victoria Beckham shared a photo of herself kissing her daughter on the lips because she understands news media cycles even better than Trump. Models who don't show off their bodies on social media quickly run out of ideas. read more

Everything You Never Gave A Shit About Victoria Beckham (VIDEO)

I want to punch the guy who created Vogue's 73 Questions series. It features female celebrities wearing a lot of makeup, trying to act casual, and answering a series of pre-screenedquestions withresponses thatare never even accidentally interesting. It's a near... read more

Victoria Beckham's Life Is Much Better Than Yours

Victoria Beckham turned 40 years old yesterday, which is truly remarkable if you consider the fact that none of the Spice Girls ever looked that young when they were popular. If you'd have asked me how old I thought she or the other women who didn't marry one of the most... read more

Victoria Beckham Used to Be More Interesting

After Victoria Beckham got done with her first few canned responses to insanely trite questions in Allure magazine, the former Spice Girl shifted the conversation to her titties because she understands pacing. Victoria begrudgingly copped to having implants earlier in... read more

Victoria Beckham Fakes an Orgasm

Often men will label charmless, sour faced, high maintenance women as frigid. That's your basic rush to judgement. There's no reason a charmless, sour faced, high maintenance woman like Victoria Beckham couldn't be some kind of insane nymphomaniac whose unquenchable... read more

Victoria Beckham Finally Happy... To Be in China

Catching sour putty faced Victoria Beckham smiling even for a single shutter frame is worth a small fortune to collectors of the weird and unique. But here's something that seems to make the rich girl smile. Take her to China. She's been there with her husband this week... read more

Victoria Beckham Always Looks Like A Released Hostage

Maybe Victoria Beckham is in a prison. A prison in her mind. Behind the bars of her own fears and anxieties. Forcibly finger banged in the shower of her insecurities and shame. Or she might just be a rich model who hasn't had a meal consisting of of more than 100... read more

Victoria Beckham Looks Pleasantly Surprised

My great Uncle Sal invented the windswept toupee. It was a pre-tousled toupee that men could wear wear out in inclement weather so their hair would look more native to the conditions. Then that bastard Sy Sperling invented fake hair implants and the toupee business died.... read more

Victoria Beckham Refuses to Crack

Victoria Beckham made her way to the Vogue Festival in London. She fucking loves clothes. She makes them. She sells them. She diddles her lady parts with them in her walk-in closet. A Vogue fashion event for Victoria Beckham is like pig in shit. Like an Eagles fan at a... read more