Kourtney Single Again Because She’s Old

August 14, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

There are no pamphlets or set of instructions when you come in close contact with a Kardashian. Scientists and other experts are still having a difficult time deciphering how the mixture of a below average R&B singer’s DNA fused... READ MORE

Bella Hadid Wants To Be Just Like This Celebrity

August 14, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  Japanese sex robot Bella Hadid lights up the cover of the new Allure Magazine with her lifeless dour mechanical face, and also apparently possesses the advanced humanoid capability of carrying out an interview. Those Japanese. Bravo. I mean... READ MORE

Lena Dunham Shares List Of Baby Names

August 14, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  First off, Lena Dunham looks not horrifying in the picture above, and it’s pretty disconcerting. If we can’t rely on Dunham to look like a halfheartedly trans Pillsbury Doughboy, what can we rely on? Dunham being a psycho ex-girlfriend,... READ MORE

Kathy Griffin Survived Backlash With The Help Of Kardashians

August 14, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Kathy Griffen may not be the most intelligent, most beautiful, or funniest woman around town, but she knows how to survive. And whose survival techniques are better to emulate than that of the human cockroaches known as the Kardashians.... READ MORE

Culkin Into Hot Asians And Becoming An Adult

August 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Macaulay Culkin doesn’t want anymore fame, he just wants to make “tiny little Asian babies.” He’s practicing procreation with another child star that’s most likely just as broken as him on the inside. You’d have to be if the... READ MORE

Amanda Bynes Still Owns Extravagant Possessions

August 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

The two most commonly pilfered items on this planet are lighters and pens. And just like rape and murder, when your ballpoint or Bic is missing, the offender is usually someone you know. Imagine how upset you would be... READ MORE

Bruce Willis Staring In MoviePass’ First Film

August 12, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Have you ever had a terrible idea, and halfway through things, instead of cutting your losses, you continue on continuing on? Typically that’s how you either end up with herpes or believing you can turn a mediocre harebrained business... READ MORE

Britney Spears Sister Seeing Backlash For Letting Daughter Use Shotgun

August 11, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Being related to Britney Spears is about as bad as it gets. Because when she’s your sister you can’t even enjoy mediocrity in peace. Jamie Lynn Spears isn’t technically a celebrity. She’s more famous for being a non-talented next... READ MORE

Ruby Rose Batwoman Role To Focus On Sexual Preference Rather Than Saving Day

August 10, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

There used to be a time where no one wondered or worried about who their favorite fictional superheroes were having sex with. But welcome to 2018, where it’s important to know if Superman is pro or anti-vax, how Spiderman... READ MORE

Brad Is A Deadbeat Dad According To Angelina

August 10, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Brad Pitt is pretty much a rolling stone. Wherever he lays his Donegal flat cap or fedora is his home. He just makes sure to never set down any of his lids at an orphanage. Because being responsible for... READ MORE