Geoffrey Rush “Has Lost His Appetite And Barely Eats” After Assault Allegations

April 10, 2018 | News | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  Geoffrey Rush’s lawyer has submitted an affidavit stating that the actor is having a full-blown bitch fest following an article in The Daily Telegraph claiming Rush behaved inappropriately towards an actress during a 2015 production of King Lear. Rush... READ MORE

Size Six Amy Schumer Claims To Eat… Carbs?

April 10, 2018 | Photos | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  I won’t believe it for a second. Size six Amy Schumer clomped onto the set of The Late Show With Stephen Colbert to talk about life with her new chef husband, Chris Fischer. Schumer marrying someone who cooks food... READ MORE

Jared Leto Is Probably 30 Seconds Away From Nearby Bus Stop

April 10, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

They’re smug, pretentious, and utilize penny-farthings as their main source of transportation. They infest inner city areas areas like cockroaches, forcing bodegas out in order to open up overpriced fair trade coffee shops. They wear lumberjack uniforms with the... READ MORE

McGregor Lets UFC Know They Can Kiss His Blarney Stones

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Dana White has been waiting for Conor McGregor to get his shit together for another UFC fight longer than most people have been waiting for Game of Thrones to return. Unfortunately neither has happened yet, and Conor is suffering... READ MORE

Bryce Dallas Howard Wants Equal Pay Because She’s So Talented And Irreplaceable

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  When you think of someone who deserves to be paid millions of dollars to act, it’s definitely Bryce Dallas Howard. I mean, wow. What a unique talent. What a memorable actress. There’s a reason she won all those Academy... READ MORE

Lily-Rose Depp Boob Smash Gifs With Gal Pal

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Depp has managed to stand out from the crowded market of narcissistic dead-eyed teen waif celebrity offspring Instagram models because of her unbridled talent of having a nice rack, and in these new gifs she shows them off while... READ MORE

Brad Pitt Most Likely Banging MIT Professor Now

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Brad Pitt is scouting common folk because elite vagina gets tiresome after awhile. Especially if it’s attached to Angelina Jolie. Brad isn’t the smartest man but he’s every woman’s wet dream so there aren’t too many women he can’t... READ MORE

Russell Simmons Attempting To Use Logic To Dodge Legal Woes

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

If she sends pics of tits you must acquit. Russell Simmons is claiming that it doesn’t count as rape if she sends naked pictures after sexy time. Simmons is obviously missing the picture and should be ashamed of himself.... READ MORE

PC Benchmark: Remember When Kate Winslet Defended Porking 15-YO On-Screen?

April 9, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  In the year 2018 cartoon characters can no longer have accents and all sex is indeed rape, so it’s nice to hop on the PC time machine every once in a while to remember that shit that came... READ MORE