Speaking of Katy Perry, she wore this fantastically designed leotard to a dance studio yesterday in Hollywood. I don’t know which studio in particular though. Try looking through the police blotter in today’s paper. If there’s a story about dozens of guy jerking off at the window of a dance studio, that should be the one.
Katy Perry was one of the guest judges last night on ‘American Idol’ when they stopped in LA, and you may find this hard to believe but she seemed to be annoyed by Kara DiWhateverhernameis, and even threatened to throw a drink in her face. Rawwrr! This kittens got claws!
But the real zinger came when DioGuardi began belting out Perry’s smash hit “I Kissed a Girl.” Within seconds, Perry interrupted, “Please stop before I throw my Coke in your face!”
In Katys defense, Kara is annoying. She always has to be the center of attention, the kind of person who tries to kill themselves by holding their breath or calls 911 after eating ice cream too fast.
The United States now has 20,000 troops in Haiti to distribute food, water and medical supplies to those effected by the earthquake, but there’s still a need for more of basically everything. Except for a silver Versace dress. They’re good on those.
BRITNEY SPEARS has agreed to donate her favourite dress to raise funds for the relief effort in earthquake-ravaged Haiti.
The frock she’s parting with is the silver Versace gown she wore for her high-profile comeback appearance at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards.
Donating a used dress that you’ll never wear again and didn’t pay for in the first place may not seem like the most amazing act of generosity, but keep in mind that Britney probably doesn’t even know what Haiti is. She probably thinks the dress is going to Pandora. “I saw on the TV, the tree where they lived, they lived in this big tree and it was on fire, and then it fell down, and the people they was all blue. I guess cuz they was sad about the tree.”
I used to date a girl from Holland (she swallowed!) so I have a special place in my heart for Dutch supermodel Doutzen Kroes, seen here yesterday in St Barths shooting for Victorias Secret. I also have a special place in my pants for Dutch supermodel Doutzen Kroes. I don’t want to give too much away, but it’s toward the top.
The bad news is that the airport in Haiti can only handle 130 flights a day, so it’s been hard to get all the supplies and experts needed to help those effected by the earthquake. The good news is that one of the planes landing today was from Hollywood, and it was filled with the healing power of Scientology.
John Travolta has flown aid supplies to Haiti in his own Boeing 707 to bolster disaster relief efforts of his Scientology group.
Dressed in yellow T-shirts, they use a process called ‘assist’ in which the power of touch is said to reconnect nervous systems shaken by trauma.
The group, which critics say is a cult doing little more than glorified massage, has received a mixed reaction to the light ‘touching’, through clothing and bandages, of fractures and infection.
You might think that an army of people who can heal the sick just by touching them would be a bigger story, maybe the biggest story of the past thousand years, but it’s not. The miraculous claims are true, obviously, but not very interesting. That’s why no one talks about it. I’m surprised they even mentioned it here.
Jenni Farley, who you may but probably don’t know by her nickname “JWoww” on the MTV show ‘Jersey Shore’, has become famous for her fantastically huge implants and tops that barely cover them. Now comes news that naked pictures of her are for sale, as was implied by every single noun in that first sentence.
There are at least three photos of Jwoww … In one photo, she is facing the camera, topless. It’s shot from the waist up and will certainly not disappoint her male fans.
A second photo shows Jwoww slightly turned, but with her back mainly toward the camera. She is wearing a skimpy wrap around her waist but that does not obscure the rear view! She’s also wearing boots.
The third photo is a full length topless frontal shot, where Jwoww is again wearing a small wrap around her waist and boots.
This girl is a genius. When are girls who want to be famous gonna accept the fact that the best way to do that is to leak naked pictures of yourself. By emailing them to me for example. That’s what Audrina Patridge did, and now look at her. She was nobody before Tyler published her naked pictures, now she’s rich as a king and engaged to George Clooney.
(She’s not engaged to George Clooney? How do you know? What are you, a detective? Are you positive? Maybe it’s a secret. That goddamn gif took me forever to make, btw.)
There’s a lot of talk these days about the people of Haiti and how we need to help them, but these pictures may blow the lid off that scam. Miranda Kerr is on a Caribbean island just like the people of Haiti are, and just like them she barely has any clothes, but you don’t see her complaining. She’s making the best of it. Looks like Haiti has a lot of growing up to do.
Dozens of fancy Hollywood stars paused from yelling at their Haitian housekeeper last week to go pitch in at the ‘Hope For Haiti Now’ telethon, and because of them it raised over 61 million dollars.
Jessica Simpson wasn’t part of the telethon, but she wants to help too. In the dumbest way imaginable. She also told me to ask if you wanted to split a piece of cheesecake. “Should we each get different kinds and see which is better,” she said to ask.
Jessica Simpson is trying to help the victims of the Haiti earthquake by organizing a shoe drive.
The singer, 29, has announced plans to team up with Nashville-based shoe charity Soles4Souls to collect at least 50,000 pairs of shoes in 50 days, which will be sent to victims in the Caribbean country.
“Let’s all do everything that we can for the tragedy in Haiti,” she says in a video clip advertising the campaign.
Go to www.50000shoes.com to make contributions.
Finally. One Haitian woman who lost everything said, “Of course I want to go get some and antibiotics and fresh water, but not in these scuffed up flats. Hopefully something with an ankle strap is on the way, or some breezy espadrilles. What looks worse, the gangrene in my foot or these slip-on earth tones?”