Thora Birch has a creepy relationship with her dad

By brendon December 15, 2010 @ 5:48 PM

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If you don’t know, Thora Birch, who became famous as the adorable little girl in movies like Patriot Games, is the daughter of Carol Connors and Jack Birch, who were both porn stars in the 70’s. In fact they met while filming Deep Throat, maybe the most famous porn movie ever (Connors, bio and picture here, was the nurse, if that helps).

So, uh, they’re pretty open minded sexually. That’s why they let her appear topless In American Beauty when she was 16.

A few years ago there was a story about Thora filming some sex scenes for a movie, and not only did her manager/dad approve of them, he insisted on being on set when they filmed them, and then he freaked everyone out by trying to make the scenes rougher and generally acting like an lunatic.

He almost cost her the job then. He definitely cost her a job now.

Birch has been axed from her off-Broadway production of of “Dracula” just weeks before the opening … after her porn star father/manager Jack Birch threatened another actor on set and was constantly meddling on set.
Jack reportedly was upset about a cast member rubbing his daughters back which is when he made the “threatening” remark “”Listen, man, I’m trying to make it easier on you – don’t touch her.”
It has also been rumored by people on the set that Thora would hang close to her father on breaks and not socializing with the rest of the cast and crew. Could this father daughter relationship be twisted and unhealthy?

Ok I’m pretty sure they’re insinuating that she’s banging her dad. So say what you will about the guy, but he must be pretty smooth. She’s a big star, she could have any guy she wants, and she chose him. What a romantic post this turned out to be!

Julia Stiles is a homewrecking whore

By brendon December 15, 2010 @ 4:03 PM

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I didn’t watch even one episode of Dexter this year because in last years finale they killed Julie Benz and so fuck them, but Julia Stiles was added to the cast as Dexters new love interest, and apparently might be the reason Michael C. Hall is divorcing Jenifer Carpenter.

Their chemistry was so crazy and so evident to everyone that writer and producers, seeing it play out on set, actually cranked up their sex scenes to capture it for show. Her career has seen a resurgence since.
Eventually the two fell in love. They were together, very close, at a Halloween party in New York this fall and those who observed them that night are not surprised now that he’s ended it with his wife.

Keep in mind that Carpenter, his wife, ALSO STARS ON THE SAME FUCKING SHOW. And there you go everyone. Welcome to Hollywood. Instead of discouraging the affair and protecting Carpenter, writers and producers chose to ruin her life and basically made Stiles give Hall a blow job to spice up a scene or two on the weekly TV show.

WRITER: “I head Jennifer is scared of snakes.”
PRODUCER: “How about a scene where we wrap a python around her throat, and it rapes her with its tail.”
WRITER: “Already on snakes.com, dude. What’s your credit card number.”

Debra Messing is a natural beauty

By brendon December 15, 2010 @ 1:46 PM

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I really hope normal girls understand that Hollywood is a complete sham and the people you see on TV look nothing like that. They’re like Cartman, or a dinosaur. They don’t exist. It’s all computers and tricks.

Debra Messing headlined a successful sitcom for years. She was widely considered to be very attractive. In reality, what the fuck is wrong with her face. And the only thing uglier than her face is the side of her face. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER FACE! She looks like Gargamel, or someone who would try to kill Batman.

two of Kate Gosselin kids were expelled, pt. 2

By brendon December 15, 2010 @ 10:11 AM

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Last month
there was a report claiming that two of Kate Gosselins punk ass kids were expelled from school because they’re violent little monsters, a report Gosselin adamantly denied on ET. “If I knew which kids were which I’d bring them out here and show you how sweet they are,” Gosselin probably said.

Oh, but hey, guess what…

Kate Gosselin lied when she denied her children Alexis and Collin were expelled from school, and Radar has learned exclusively that the situation is far worse than what has been previously reported.
One of the expelled Gosselin kids physically harmed an adult at the school TWO TIMES, creating a situation that caused school administrators to believe they had no choice but to remove that child from school
both of Gosselin children were abusive to other children in the school, creating an untenable situation.

Wait, so one of them is Alexis? The girl. So it’s an Asian girl acting out? Oh well never mind, now this story is kind of hot. She’s already one third of the way to 18, and we need to start prepping the Asa Akiras and Evelyn Lins of tomorrow. Normal childhood = no anal, and I don’t wanna risk that. I can’t. I won’t. Don’t think for one second I won’t have this little bitch beaten up.

Angelina Jolie is a good actress

By brendon December 14, 2010 @ 8:05 PM

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Angelina Jolie recieved a Golden Globe nomination today (full nominee list, rightfully prefaced by saying these awards are a complete sham bought and paid for by the studios, here) an nomination so dumb even she’s laughing about it, but more importantly, today a still from Wanted somehow arrived online, showing Angelinas naked and beautiful ass, a scene that was edited in the movie so you didn’t see it.

Suffice to say that was a terrible decision. Her ass is so wonderful, it’s probably the best proof yet that God exists.

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds broke up

By brendon December 14, 2010 @ 4:54 PM

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Before she met Ryan Reynolds, Scarlett Johansson was sort of a more talented version of Lindsay Lohan. She was always out in bars and, reportedly, pretty wild sexually (there’s a rumor she banged Benicio del Toro in an elevator). But then she and Mr Perfect started dating in 2007, they got married in September of 2008, and she’s been nothing but successful, professional and seemingly happy ever since.

“Seemingly”. People says…

According to a source, the couple quietly split six months ago, and Johansson initiated the move. The actress began apartment-hunting in New York City and is currently in Jamaica with some girlfriends, the source adds.
“After long and careful consideration on both our parts, we’ve decided to end our marriage,” they say in a joint statement. “We entered our relationship with love and it’s with love and kindness we leave it. While privacy isn’t expected, it’s certainly appreciated.”

Ryan Reynolds is respected, rich, handsome, funny, charming and in terrific physical shape. Where is she gonna find a guy to compete with that? Oh, hey, look, there’s one. Right there in my mirror. Why hello Scarlett. My name is Brendon. How are you today?

Katie Holmes likes it rough

By brendon December 14, 2010 @ 3:47 PM

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Katie Holmes was at the Grove in Hollywood last night, filming scenes for a new Adam Sandler movie called Jack and Jill, and when she bent over it showed off a huge bruise on her ass.

This wasn’t part of the scene, so was she injured? Did she fall down? Hopefully this wasn’t some sex related bruise, because, if there’s one thing I know about anal sex, it’s that the running start doesn’t work. It makes aim almost impossible and can lead to accidents. DON’T BE A HERO KATIE!

Oprah tried to kill Hugh Jackman

By brendon December 14, 2010 @ 12:32 PM







Hugh Jackman rode a zip line from the top of the Sydney Opera House down to the stage where Oprah Winfrey was filming one of her Australia shows today, but then instead of stopping, he crashed into a lighting rig which broke and sent a small piece of glass into his eye. “Hey you’re payin for that,” Oprah probably thought to herself. “What am I, made out of lighting rigs?”

Sky News says…

Jackman flipped 90 degrees on impact and damaged a spotlight, then hung from the gantry for several seconds before descending to the stage.
‘It’s a little hot up here,’ were Jackman’s first words.
‘I’m not hundred per cent, I’ve hurt my eye.’
Winfrey called for an ice-pack and paramedics rushed to the stage to treat Jackman for his injury as a break was ordered in the filming of the program.

Maybe Jackman had an accident because people aren’t supposed to be zip lining into rooms. I know he’s a big action star, but this had disaster written all over it. And I’m no pansy. In fact I’m a complete badass. I even have a cobra tattoo on the top of my foot, because my kicks are like the sting of the mighty cobra.