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Kate Moss Is a Fun Mom

March 1, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kate Moss is a real woman with real woman feelings. She’s not some stoned Barbie doll existing merely for you to mock and ridicule. She’s a wife and a working mom and a contributing member of her society. Sometimes... READ MORE

Alessandra Ambrosio Is Still Good At Being Pretty

March 1, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Victoria’s Secret model and all-around attractive Brazilian woman Alessandra Ambrosio had a photo shoot in downtown Los Angeles yesterday, and it really challenged her to push her talents to the limits. At one point, she was wearing one dress,... READ MORE

Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis Are Engaged

February 28, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Confirming what everyone has known for what feels like years, or at least since he dumped his grandmother’s bridge partner, Ashton Kutcher has reportedly finally put an engagement ring on Mila Kunis‘ finger. The co-stars of That 70s Show... READ MORE

Melanie Griffith Doesn’t Give A Fuck

February 28, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Most restaurants in major cities have either banned smoking or hired someone to blast you in the face with a fire hose if you even think about lighting up in or around the property, but the staff at this... READ MORE

Instant Retraction: Carl’s Jr. Burgers Are Fucking Awesome

February 28, 2014 | site news | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Five seconds ago I made an off-the-cuff and not entirely complimentary remark about Carl’s Jr. burgers. Since that time I’ve come to realize that their burgers are totally fucking awesome and that they might be on our list of... READ MORE

Nina Adgal Likes Her Some Fish

February 28, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Nobody’s managed to more successfully mix the themes of cheap processed meat and the chances of having sex with a hot woman so well as Carl’s Jr.. Carl Karcher was a pretty conservative Orange Country guy, Bircher, didn’t like... READ MORE

Lisa Opie In A White Bikini

February 28, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Girls seem to get very important calls at the beach. I’m not sure who they’re conversing with, but I just assume they’re moving ten billion shares of Dynacorp or ordering the death of sub-Saharan militia leaders for snaking their... READ MORE

Katy Perry: Midwife With a Healthy Rack

February 28, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Katy Perry is apparently now delivering babies in people’s homes. You know, because having big yabbos and formerly laying beneath Jon Mayer and Russell Brand give you the requisite knowledge to assist in childbirth. Katy bragged on Twitter that... READ MORE

Maria Menounos Desperate to Get One Male Viewer

February 28, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m worried that if I watch I ever watch Extra, my balls will shrivel up like a time lapse clip on how grapes are made into raisins. Even the rugged presence of AC Slater can’t elevate that show to... READ MORE

Rihanna Is Super Stylish

February 28, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A jacket that keeps you warm is a jacket and will run you about a hundred bucks. But a jacket that shows off your bare tits in Paris is a coat that’ll tick you two-thousand at the register. To... READ MORE

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