STUFF FROM ALL OVER

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 1:04 PM

KATE GROOMBRIDGE IS NAKED – that POA in the picture above is Kate Groombridge, a famous UK model.  I wish I were kidding when I say that this picture is like 10 years old, and it has more sentimental value to me than my parents.  Point being, she’s naked in some new movie, and JoBlo has the clips.  Not that anyone would care about something like that.

MADONNA COMPARES JOHN MCCAIN TO HITLER – this may give Obama the edge, because I bet most of the stoned gay transsexuals that make up Madonna’s audience were leaning toward McCain.  

KIM KARDASHIAN IS A DRAMA QUEEN
– remember when a source compared Kim Kardashians cut foot to a murder scene.  Oh hey guess what.

JAPANESE GOBLIN SHARK – any one of those things by itself is scary.  Put them together and you’ll shit yourself.

BRITNEY WILL NOT BE AT THE VMA’S

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 9:22 AM

Despite two weeks of rumors to the contrary, Britney Spears will not perform at this years VMA music awards. Us magazine says…

"Britney Spears will not be performing at the VMAs this year. I'm telling you officially and unequivocally," Ryan Seacrest quoted her manager, Larry Rudolph, as saying on his KIIS-FM radio show Monday morning.
Rudolph told Seacrest that Spears "is in the middle of recording her next album, which is going amazingly well, and was never supposed to perform at that show."

Damn.  That shit would have been awesome.  Because last year, she actually practiced for like 3 months beforehand.  She did shows and everything.  And she still stumbled around like a tranquilized bear.  To put her out there with no practice would have been legendary.  The lights would hit her and she would kind of yelp and cover her eyes then stagger backwards, as if she were some caveman we just teleported there.



AMY WINEHOUSE STILL HIGH, SEXY

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 8:41 AM

The News of the World has a video today, allegedly showing Amy Winehouse snorting cocaine inside a Camden club.  Shocking, isn’t it?

Desperate for a fix, the singer is seen snorting the cocaine off a CD case in full view of partygoers.
Now Amy’s mother-in-law Georgette wants the police to take action and arrest her.
In an exclusive interview she said: “I’m shocked by the video. When I look at Amy I think: ‘For Christ’s sake, just get a grip of yourself.’  Enough is enough.  As the police know Amy is a drug addict – and she has now been caught twice on film taking illegal drugs – they should arrest her and put her behind bars.  Rehab clinics are a waste of money, unless you want them to work.  Amy doesn’t want to give up drugs, so she’s got to learn the hard way in prison.  Police have to act. She is making a mockery of the law. It has got to stop.”

Man I don’t know.  Prison sounds expensive.  What's rope cost, like a dollar.  Can’t we just hang her?  Or back over her with an old car?  Human life is precious, but only up to a certain point.  For Amy that was about 6 months ago.

MARCIA CROSS IS A MAN

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 8:29 AM

I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!  (full size pic here, source = splash news)

AMERICAN IDOL GETS A NEW JUDGE

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 7:14 AM

After the lowest ratings ever last year, American Idol is mixing things up this season and adding a fourth judge.  She is songwriter Kara DioGuardi, and she’s written songs for Britney, Gwen Stefani, Pink, Leona Lewis, and Nicole whats-her-name from the Pussycat Dolls (pictured above) among others.  Although I looked at the list (on her website here) and I’ve only heard of one of these fuckin songs, and that one sucked.  So I guess you could say I’m not impressed.  Anyway, Us magazine says,

DioGuardi will appear at the judges' table with Paula Abdul, Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson on the eighth season of the hit show, which premieres in January.
“We are turning the heat up on Idol this year and are thrilled to welcome Kara to the judges' table," show creator and executive producer Simon Fuller said in a statement.
"She is a smart, sassy lady, and one of America's most successful songwriters. We know she will bring a new level of energy and excitement to the show," Fuller added.

Oh it's working already Mr. Fuller.  This has added so much excitement I can barely control my breathing.  I can’t believe they got Kara Diogardy.  They must have paid her a fortune.  Karla DioGarmi will bring in viewers by the dozen.  "Boy that Tara D’Gwardi really had something to say", people will exclaim.



NO ONE CARES ABOUT HER STUPID FOOT

By brendon August 25, 2008 @ 6:36 AM

Kim Kardashian slashed her foot open on a glass coffee table and was rushed to the hospital last night in New York.  TMZ says…

No word on how many stitches she needed, but a source tells TMZ there was "so much blood, it looked like a murder scene. (*)"

TMZ goes on to say the accident may jeopardize Kim’s place on this seasons "Dancing With The Stars".  But let's hope not.  Seeing Kim make it on broadcast television would be a ray of hope to little girls everywhere.  At least little girls whose plans include fucking black guys on tape and then releasing it to the public so they can be famous.

(* note – maybe not the greatest analogy if you’re talking about Kim Kardashian, who was rich because her dad was OJs defense lawyer after he chopped off his wifes head.)



VANESSA HUDGENS IS ADORABLE

By brendon August 22, 2008 @ 11:27 AM

I haven’t had to stand up in a dress as many times as you might think, but it looks like something I could do.  Without flashing my underwear.  I hope this doesn’t sound like I'm bragging.  (picture source = pacific coast news)



BOOBS AND RED BULL. GUESS WHO.

By brendon August 22, 2008 @ 10:30 AM

Does that gas station have a hair salon and MAC counter in it, because Lindsay Lohan stepped out of it and looked amazing.  Cigarettes, Red Bull and Cheezits must be packed with vitamins.