Charlie Sheen Is Tired Of Giving Brooke Mueller All That Free Money

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Back in May, Charlie Sheen‘s ex-wife, Brooke Mueller (seen above after her recent rug store heist), lost custody of their twin sons because of her suspected drug use, and one day later she entered a drug rehab program at UCLA. Interestingly, Charlie’s other ex-wife, Denise Richards, was granted custody of the kids, despite having no […]

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Kristen Stewart Is Such A Fashion Icon

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Someone somewhere recently called Kristen Stewart the best-dressed actress in Hollywood, because she has the amazing talent of dressing up in nice clothes when she has to attend events to promote her films, which showcase her otherwise lack of talent. Because of that, she gets to sit in the front row at events like yesterday’s […]

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Kaley Cuoco Getting Shtupped by Superman

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

According to several excitably romantic sounding gossip blogs, Superman ‘mega-hunk’ Henry Cavill is now sticking it to Kaley Cuoco. I guess you’d have to call that a win for Kaley. Even though she’s a great looking woman for whom I’d mule drugs into Singapore if she promised me sex of any kind, I’m guessing that […]

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Paula Deen Offered Porn Contract

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

America used to be great for many things. Now, we’re down to just being the best goddamn porn producers in the world. Nobody makes porn like we do. Russia makes a shitload, but it’s horribly lit shit obsessed with old nylons that somebody’s mom had to wait in line four months to get. The Scandinavians […]

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Lauryn Hill In Jail Because of Racism and Maybe a Little Tax Evasion

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It took me almost a week to get through the pre-jail screed of Lauryn Hill. She posted it to her Tumblr account so that it wouldn’t get distorted by the white media establishment. It’s really fucking long. And lame. And written by somebody who thinks they are profound. It goes on and on and on, […]

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Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose Are in Love

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Whiz Khalifa, real name Cameron, which is why  he changed it to Whiz Khalifa, sucked the tongue out of his new baby mama Amber Rose at the BET Awards. I guess when the paparazzi asked Whiz to kiss his beautiful wife, or whatever she is, the both of them started getting hot and heavy for […]

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Kriss Kross’ Chris Kelly Croaked ‘Cause Of Coke

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

The autopsy reports on Chris Kelly of the backward pants wearing 90’s duo Kriss Kross are back and to no one’s surprise it was a drug overdose. He was found unresponsive on his couch back in May and was pronounced dead soon after. It’s unclear exactly what combo of drugs killed him but his mom […]

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Lana Del Rey Shows Off Her Tattoo

July 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Girl who have tattoos around their pubes are hot. I don’t care what the tattoo is. It tells the world, I had a guy with a needle inking some shit above my privates so that you can see it when you take off my pants. It also tells the world you’re a girl who got […]

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Rihanna Goes Braless At Paris Fashion Week

July 2, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Paris is known for two things. Haute couture and people who are total dicks. The two join forces a few times a year for Fashion Week. When the entire world of largely unproductive, but wealthy annoying people descend upon the City of Light to be extra wealthy and annoying. On the positive side, lots of […]

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Lindsay Lohan Going Into the Wild After Rehab

July 2, 2013 | Uncategorized | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Lindsay Lohan now realizes that the only way to save herself from her addictions is to disappear. Hide from the media, parties, her drug toting friends in Los Angeles and New York. When she gets out of rehab, she’s headed out into the wild. Somewhere far away where she can get back in touch with […]

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