the Grammy Awards

Beyonce Knowles should be pretty pissed off to be lumped in with Moo-riah Carey and Britney Spears. Beyonce always looks great, great voice, never a hint of anything weird or shady. Unlike the diva and the donut. 100 dollars says that those trophies in Mariah's arms have teeth marks on them. Cause normally anything shiny is the wrapper for hollow milk chocolate. Or probably solid for a big star like her. And click on...

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Jessica Simpson is a tease

God dammit. I was so excited when the first pictures of Jessica Simpson at some pre-Grammy party ran in the Sun on Tuesday. They were really small but even so you could tell it was her in a see-thru dress. Then I used my powerful Hollywood connections to get the high-res, and it turns out that it's Jess in a bra and a see thru dress. C'mon baby. Don't be so uptight. Slay that dragon called modesty. Christ, you chose...

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Richie Sambora needs his own computer

People.com says that the final split between Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora may have been caused by an email. The couple was having problems but remained committed until Locklear discovered a suggestive email with pictures from a female friend of Samboras. Sambora denies any wrongdoing, but sources confirm that the email was the final straw. People says: "Locklear found the e-mail, which contained 'provocative...

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Mandy Moore kisses girls

Umm, so I guess Mandy Moore is guest starring on 'Scrubs' these days. And I guess she kissed a girl the last time she was on there. You're more than welcome to ask me why, or why the girl is dressed like a boy, as long as you realize I have no fuckin idea what the answer is gonna be. I do love the idea of Mandy Moore kissing girls though. Especially since she's not all leather pants and implants, she's clean cut and...

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Tom Cruise is craaazzzyy

The always great Jeannette Walls reports today that Tom Cruise wants Katie Holmes to spend more time focusing on her role as a wife and mother and less time having hopes and dreams and independent thought. "I've got Katie tucked away, so no one will get to us until my child is born

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Jessica Simpson has bad taste

Apparently the rumors are true, and Jessica Simpson is now "dating" - or whatever you young people today call it - Maroon 5 lead singer Adam Levine. The two were seen getting very cosy Monday night at a Kanye West pre-Grammy concert party. Also in attendance were

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Gwyneth Paltrow is really smart

Patronizing bitch Gwyneth Paltrow says that she prefers living in London to Los Angeles because British people are "more intelligent and civilized". "I love living in the UK! Brits are far more intelligent and civilized than Americans. I love the fact that you can hail a taxi and just pick up the pram and put it in the back of the cab without collapsing it. I love the parks. I love the zoo in Regents Park. I love the...

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Britney Spears is now in trouble

TMZ now says that the LA County Department of Children and Family Services has contacted the LA County Sheriff's Department in regards to the pictures showing Britney Spears driving with her baby on her lap without proper child restraint. But, apparently, none of this was Britney's fault. It was all someone else's fault. Quoth Britney: "I was terrified that this time the physically aggressive paparazzi would put both...

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the Vanity Fair Hollywood Issue

Good news if you're a fan of ghost white asses, because the Vanity Fair Hollywood issue is about to hit newsstands, but not without some near legendary behind the scenes headaches. This is the issue with designer Tom Ford as guest editor, the issue that at one point was to feature everyone naked, the issue where Rachel McAdams walked out of the cover shoot because she refused to pose nude. Luckily for me and my penis,...

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Mariah Carey is private

Annanova says today that Mariah Carey doesn't like eating in public because people stare at her, so she'll usually only eat at home, and sometimes even puts on a bib so she can lay around and eat in bed. "I am just like, whatever, nobody is looking at me for once! That's why I don't really like to eat in public. When people say, 'Mariah never eats in public,' I'm like, 'You're right.' " Yeah, that's what we all do,...

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Little kids hate Mischa Barton

Cmon, little kid, you almost got her

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Britney Spears is completely unfit

Yeah Britney, you don't sweat the details, do you baby. Like putting your new born infant in a child seat. You know, to protect his young life. Yeah, that would have taken forever. Fuck that. Propping him up in your lap in front of the windshield while you drive with one hand is just as good. Hey, could you do me a favor, when child services takes your baby and has you arrested cause your unfit as a mother and a...

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Britney Spears is fat

Britney Spears has reportedly been approached by several weight loss companies to enroll in their program and endorse their "healthy living" plans, but a source says that Britney is tired of dieting and the hard work required to look as she once did. Britney is said to have refused millions because she's comfortable with her new weight, despite the fact that her idiot husband is said to be calling her names such as...

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Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct 2

Sex kitten reader Krista sent in this video link, and it starts with a couple of naked chicks, so naturally I just assumed she was coming on to me. Then I saw Sharon Stone and tons and tons of deviant sex and full frontal nudity and assumed maybe it was a commercial for fucking. You know, to promote fucking. But then a screen came up that said 'Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction', and I put my pants back on and thought,...

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Nikki Cox engaged to Jay Mohr

Comedian Jay Mohr and actress Nikki Cox are engaged and plan to marry next winter. Cox, 27, stars on the NBC drama 'Las Vegas', which is where she and Mohr, 35, met when he made a guest appearance on the show last fall. It will the first marriage for Cox, who was previously engaged to Bobcat Goldthwait. Mohr was married to model/actress Nicole Chamberlain from 1998-2004 and has one son from that marriage. I'm not sure...

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