hmmm. well, look at that

These pictures of Ali Lohan must have been processed with magic because for the first time ever she looks sort of F-able. I know she's 15 and you're not supposed to have sex with 15-year-olds(*), but it was her moms idea to whore her up like she was 35, not mine. I'd... read more

kelly mcgillis is gay now

Kelly McGillis, who you may remember from "Top Gun" but probably don't, has come out as a lesbian, shocking everyone, at least until they look at a recent picture of her. "I'm done with the man thing. I did that, I need to move on in life. That's another part of being... read more

everyone hates madonna

The US had a good run but it seems that Madonna has decided to bail on London and return to the Colonies, and she's making plans to spend the summer in the Hamptons. As always her magnetic personality leaves a trial of smiles wherever she goes, in this case a vineyard on... read more

halle berry is somewhat attractive

Halle Berry is absolutely fantastic looking of course, but I'm not sure I'd invite her to the premiere of my movie if she wasn't in it. She's a little too good looking. It's distracting. Jesus and the Devil could be having a knife fight 3 feet behind her and I'm not sure... read more

um, is she okay

Lindsay is still in Hawaii as of today, although God knows how she's paying for this. I asked the dude I know if the porn producer who loaned her the Maserati is bankrolling this and he said he didn't know. That was a good story wasn't it? The key to a good story is to... read more

sean penn is single

Sean Penn and Robin Wright have filed for divorce from each other twice already, but never one to give up, Penn filed for divorce yet again this past Friday. The two have been married for 13 years but a couple for nearly 20. They have two teenage sons, one 18 and one 15.... read more

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chris brown thinks this is unfair

Chris Browns attorney was in court this morning attempting to have the case against his client thrown out because details have been leaked to the public. Details such as, "he punched her in the left eye with his right hand (then) continued to punch her. The assault... read more

oh stfu people magazine

People magazines 100 Most Beautiful list (here) hits newsstands today, and as always it's mostly hippie fag rambling beneath flattering pictures of fat people and old people who aren't attractive in any way but we have to pretend like they are to show how fancy and... read more

wait, who the hell is that?

Wait, that's the girl Mel Gibson has been sleeping with? Well then who the hell was that other chick? Obviously this is the real one because Mel took her to the premiere of "Wolverine" ("More like Whore-verine", Robyn Gibson would say later) last night. I don't feel too... read more

more distractions

Okay I still need to figure some stuff out here with the new software. I don't think I'm in love with the font. Feel free to email me if you have any ideas. No need to write and tell me that I suck, because that's very much assumed. In the meantime, look over here, it's... read more

site news

Oh dear God I thought this day would never come. Finally, Tyler has a new publishing software. It's a work in progress, so please don't freak out if things are a little dicey. Whatever it is you hate right now will be different in a week. Unless you hate Kirsten Dunst... read more

pants are hard

You can’t see it in these but Lindsay is in Hawaii on her Blackberry looking up directions for pants. The search is just showing her how to make pants or buy pants but that’s not the problem, she already has the pants, they're sitting on the floor in that guys room right... read more

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