Paris Hilton is a good person

By brendon September 15, 2009 @ 3:19 PM

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Paris Hilton was in Milan, Italy last night, and during an event at a “gay friendly” club, she initially refused to hold a sign that read, “Stop Homophobia”. Later she said it was a misunderstanding. I was so impressed, I went and told her so.

ME: Hey Paris. I’m glad you held up that sign. I feel the same way, I think gay people should have the same rights as everyone else.

PARIS: (nsfw language)

ME: Am I a faggot? What does, I mean no but … look, never mind. I just think you and I agree on this and might have more in common than I thought.

PARIS: (nsfw language)

ME: You know what never mind. You’re a fuckin idiot.

Alessandra knows how to dress

By brendon September 15, 2009 @ 2:47 PM

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Victorias Secret supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio had a kid this time last year, but you’d never know it by looking at her as she strutted around Manhattan last night in damn near nothing. Is there anything on earth better than a hot girl who dresses slutty? Actually yes, there probably is, but this is still pretty terrific.

what?

By brendon September 15, 2009 @ 1:06 PM

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Say what you will about Jessica Simpson, but she’s an optimist, as you can tell by the fact that she has taken to twitter to help find her dog after it was STOLEN BY COYOTES!

My heart is broken because a coyote took my precious Daisy right in front of our eyes. HORROR! We are searching. Hoping. Please help!

“Carmel”? What in the hell is “carmel”? I know what “caramel” is but quite frankly that makes even less sense. I don’t mean to brag but I think I know the color white when I see it.

Kanye really is sorry

By brendon September 15, 2009 @ 3:20 AM

Kanye West honored his commitment and appeared on the premier of the Jay Leno show last night, but before performing with Rihanna and JayZ he sat down and HOLY SHIT someone take away this dudes belts and shoelaces before he kills himself. I think its safe to say he really is sorry about crashing Taylor Swift at the VMAs.

Yeah, it’s been extremely difficult. I just — just dealing with the fact that I hurt someone or took anything away, you know, from a talented artist or from anyone, because I only wanted to help people. My entire life, I’ve only wanted to give and do something that I felt was right. And I immediately knew in the situation that it was wrong, and it wasn’t a spectacle or just — you know, it’s actually someone’s emotions, you know, that I stepped on. And it was very — it was just — it was rude, period. And, you know, I’d like to be able to apologize to her in person.

When asked if Kanyes public apology was sincere and enough that Taylor could forgive the horrible things hes done, Rihanna said, “is this all some kind of elaborate joke?”

aw screw you, kanye

By brendon September 15, 2009 @ 1:23 AM

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You were gonna see this later today anyway. Might as well get it over with.

1952 – 2009

By brendon September 14, 2009 @ 9:14 PM

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In January of 2008, Patrick Swayze was diagnosed with Stage IV pancreatic cancer. Stage IV is the final of the five stages (0,1,2,3,4), meaning the cancer had already spread to other organs. Given just weeks to survive, he continued to travel with his wife of 34 years, to work on his A&E series ‘the Beast’ and to defy the odds. Until today.

Patrick Swayze, the actor and classically trained dancer whose role in the enduringly popular “Dirty Dancing” made him a movie star, one who struggled with the alienation of fame and against being typecast as a leading man, died Monday. He was 57.
Swayze, who also starred in the blockbuster film ” Ghost,” died with his family at his side, his publicist, Annett Wolf, told the Associated Press.

When I die my greatest hope is that it will be after a life well lived, with someone I love, and my final days marked with dignity. Instead of going to hookers and crying because I can’t get an erection, which is what I do now.

afternoon headlines

By brendon September 14, 2009 @ 6:32 PM

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KANYE WEST – has apologized to Taylor Swift again but tonight he can do it on TV because he’s a guest on the new Jay Leno show. Kanye is only scheduled as a musical guest, but it would be hard to not mention last night. Of course Kanye will probably take the microphone and yell at everyone so Jays questions won’t really matter anyway. (ap)

WHITNEY HOUSTON – tells Oprah that Bobby Brown once spit in her face. No one likes a tattle-tale Whitney. (ny daily news)

BRITNEY SPEARS – saw a male model named Bekim Trenova in a magazine and decided he should be her boyfriend, so she faked an audition for one of her videos. When he arrived there was no camera crew, just Britney. “But Bekim found the whole thing ‘weird’ and made a polite but excuse ridden escape.” That’s why my fake production office is surrounded by a wall of fire. (ny daily news)

JAYDE NICOLE – Hef may be (is) 1900 years old, but his penises decision making is mint condition. Jayde Nicole is awesome, like a discount Megan Fox, and this months Playmate (Kimberly Phillips – nsfw pic and centerfold) is even hotter. Point being, Jayde hit Miami Beach today with her family but without her dumbass boyfriend. In fact they haven’t been together in almost a week. Don’t worry Jayde, I get the message. Loud and clear. You want me to kill Brody Jenner. I’m way ahead of you.
(10 more pictures here. hq jump here. source = splash news online)

sometimes katy is awesome

By brendon September 14, 2009 @ 3:22 PM

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More often than not, Katy Perry dresses like a special needs student and does everything she can to look unattractive. But every now and then, she’ll remember she’s a hot girl with huge breasts and dress accordingly. Last night at the MTV VMAs was one of those times. You would be really mad if you’re one of those religious people who think semen should only be used for procreation and masturbation wastes the gift of life, because I just destroyed more life in one shot than Darth Vader when he blew up that planet.

(20 more pictures here. hq jump here. source = splash and wenn)