Jack Osbourne sported his new Mel Gibson shirt last night at a bar in Hollywood, and just for the record, if you’re someone who wears “funny” t-shirts, I fucking hate you. Unless it’s a Garfield “I hate Mondays” shirt, which is obviously timeless.
UPDATE – I don’t know why I continue to be such a vacillating, no-decision making spaz with this contest but I keep changing things around and all it does is screw it up. Hopefully I’ll magically get smart overnight and figure it out by next week.
Even Fiona and her hotness was a major problem, at least for other girls. Because according to the email and the thousands who voted, unless you are Fiona, there’s a very real chance your boyfriend hates you now. In her home state, “Fionas tits” was already the third leading cause of divorce, and now that’s only gonna get worse.
Needless to say she won this weeks $500, and next Friday there will be another vote with more insanely hot and mostly naked readers, some of whom you’ve already seen if you follow Tyler on twitter and facebook. And now I’m gonna bail on this tailspin of an update because it’s become obvious that I’m not gonna say anything even remotely interesting or, god forbid, funny. Feel free to click the “Read more” if you want to relive the magic from yesterday.
Jude Law and Sienna Miller went to the beach in Ponzo, Italy today, and it was quite the window into their relationship. Sienna is the one who spent the day smoking, drinking, looking cold and jumping off shit into the water, while Jude is the one who wanted to spend … the … day … snuggling.
Jesus Jude, get a grip. If that old guy from those Dos Equis commercials saw Jude acting like this, he would punch him right in the face, and then give Sienna a proper banging. Like a man.
(source = inf daily)
Katy Perry has a new promo picture for “Teenage Dream“, which is still over a month away, and instead of posing for an all new shoot she took the unusual step of releasing a personal picture from the time she and I went to the beach. I never really liked this one because you can’t see my face, but it’s not my record you know, and she looks good so I can understand why she chose it.
Just before her sentencing two weeks ago, Lindsay Lohan told the judge that she had changed and was taking responsibility for the 8000 laws she’s broken. Then the judge gave her 90 days in jail and Lindsay revealed that she was just joking and not gonna take responsibility for shit, and instead would do everything possible to not suffer any consequences of any kind.
So with that in mind, yesterday she checked into a drug rehab called Pickford Lots run by her new attorney Robert Shapiro. Very few details are known just yet, but E! says…
Lohan isn’t looking to get off scot-free, but rather wants to spend those 90 days in a locked-down rehab facility, not plain old jail.
I fuckin bet she does, especially since X17 gives this time line of day one:
3:45 pm – Ali and Lindsay arrive at Pickford Lots.
10:00 pm – Samantha Ronson arrives for a visit with Lindsay, stays 45 minutes and leaves.
11:00 pm – Lindsays assistant arrives with pillows for a family sleepover.
1:00 am – Dina arrives to spend the night with Lindsay.
2:00 am – Eilat Anschel arrives and visits Lindsay for about an hour.
Anschel is reportedly her new
boyfriend girlfriend by the way. The perplexing thing about all of this is that Lindsay tells everyone that she doesn’t drink or do drugs, and the SCRAM bracelet she wore for a month proves it. According to her, there’s nothing to rehab. If she had told the truth she wouldn’t have to go to jail, but now her lies have seemingly sealed her fate. Heavy, right? This is like a story you hear about in the bible.
(the pics are Lindsay in the new German GQ. try not to fall in love)
MEL GIBSON – might have hit his 6-month-old daughter Lucia, causing bruises, during a fight with his ex Oksana. So really it sounds more like Oksanas fault than Mels. Stop using babies as a shield you crazy bitch. (hp)
SUICIDE GIRLS - won’t be allowed at this years Comic-Con for some dumb reason, even though they’re much more in line with that culture than shit like “Chuck”. The most popular models will be there anyway of course, like Bob Suicide (who looks like this when she starts to get naked and this a few minutes later). She’s the best thing to ever happen to comic loving nerds, and will be until science gets off their ass and finds a way for me to have sex with Kim Possible. (details on her twitter)
LINDSAY LOHAN - has hired OJ Simpsons lawyer Robert Shapiro to hopefully get her out of jail. His plan is to convince the judge she belongs in a drug rehab instead, and to blame the so-called “evidence” on ginger hating cops. (tmz)
BROOKLYN DECKER - looked great at the ESPY’s last night, and I’m devastated that I forgot to watch the show. Finally, someone figured out a way to declare a winner in sports, and I missed it! (getty)
The fourth Mel Gibson audio clip has just been released on radar, and it begins with him screaming that he had to sell his Laker box seats because of Oksana and basically saying that he’s broke. Which is amazing because in 2006 his net worth was estimated at $850 million (source). But he says he had to sell some paintings, then he huffs for a while, then he just screams out every synonym for “slut” that he can think of.
“So don’t call me mean when I’m nice to you. Because I’d like to show you what mean really is. Bitch, cunt, whore, gold digger! All true! You fucking proved it to me! If you’re ever interested in proving otherwise, let me know. If you don’t care, I know you know what you are too.”
“Look at yourself. And look what you’ve done. Look what you’ve fucking done! Look at your son. He’s a fucking mess. You fucking excuse for a mother. You’re a fucking bitch!”
So really all these clips were from one phone call? That sort of makes it better, doesn’t it, because he was probably just drunk again. Unless he really did hit her in which case fuck him. Where in the hell is this guy, by the way? Oksana, if by any chance you’re reading this, duck.
Nicole Scherzinger has been in England lately filling in as a judge on Simon Cowells “the X-Factor”, but here she is in France on a beach popular with the rich and famous who want to get some sun and slice up their feet at the same time. I would have thought a beach covered with rocks would be a universally accepted sign that God didn’t want people going there but apparently not. What about monsters, would that work? Or should we just skip ahead and give the monsters knives.