Ashton Kutcher is cheating on Demi Moore

Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore started dating in 2003 and got married in 2005, but they've always been an unlikely couple. Not because of the 15 year age difference (she's 47, he's 32) but because she's a good actress and seems nice, whereas he's a smug fuking retard. In... read more

Live stream of the Discovery Channel gunman

SECOND UPDATE - aaaannndddd he's dead. Shot dead by a police sniper. How fucking badass is that. But I'm taking down the stream and moving this off the front page because it's useless now. Just like this guys brain matter. UPDATE - at 4:48pm, police shot the suspect and... read more

Salma Hayek understands fashion

Salma Hayek went to Madeo in Los Angeles last night for dinner, and to make the night special she squeezed her size Huge breasts into a top made for toddlers. After seeing Anne Hathaway earlier, I wish there was some way to bring back segregation but stick me in with the... read more

Anne Hathaway got a really short haircut

Anne Hathaway is in Paris this week filming a romantic comedy called "One Day". As in, "One Day, I went to the pet groomer and got a haircut and they chopped it all off and it was a terrible idea because no girl ever looks better with short hair. Some girls look ok but... read more

Paris Hilton might actually be in trouble

These stories never turn out the way I want them to (with a hanging, and crows), but Paris Hilton could be in real trouble after Las Vegas police found almost a gram of cocaine in her purse this weekend. Hilton is claiming it wasn't her purse and she didn't know the coke... read more

Tuesday afternoon headlines

NOBODY PUTS BABY IN A CORNER - but they can put her in a dress with big ruffles, because Jennifer Grey will be a contestant on 'Dancing With The Stars', along with Brandy, Florence Henderson, Audrina Patridge, and Bristol Palin. The men will be Kurt Warner, David... read more

Demi Moore is a good dancer

Demi Moore and her way cool husband Ashton Kutcher were on stage at a Snoop Dog concert in Vegas Friday night (good luck figuring out which race should be more embarrassed by that statement), and while Ashton sat and pantomimed, "I'm a jackass with no improv skills" to... read more

Gemma Arterton is in a bikini, hard to impress

Gemma Arterton (English model and actress, star of ‘Quantum of Solace', 'Clash of the Titans', ‘Prince of Persia') is on vacation with some unworthy big-titted jackass in Italy this week, and if I'm interpreting this right, the key to getting a girl who would normally be... read more

Lindsay Lohan is already breaking the law again

This story about Lindsay Lohan running a stop sign because she was racing to a bar this weekend, just 5 days after getting out of rehab, is so full of shocking surprises, you should probably check with your physician before you read it. Fox News says... Early Sunday... read more

Britney Spears is still in a bikini

Britney Spears was still in Hawaii this weekend, and still in a bikini and still with her boyfriend Jason Trawick. And, I guess, her kids are just home somewhere. Hopefully with a nanny. Or just leaving them in the yard works too. They'll keep coming around if you feed... read more

Paris Hilton charged with felony possession of cocaine

Paris Hilton was charged with felony possession of cocaine today in Las Vegas, and if convicted, she could face a minimum of one year in jail. This all began Friday night after she was pulled over for suspicion of smoking marijuana, leading police to find .8 grams of... read more

the Emmys, as always, were a baffling mess

The Hollywood Reporter says the ratings for last nights Emmy Awards were just slightly higher than last year (a 10.0 in 2009, a 10.1 for 2010) which proves that people will watch anything because that show never makes any god damn sense. First of all, everyone always... read more