Oh, the excitement

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 5:33 PM

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Stacy Keibler hosted a party at the MGMs Wet Republic pool this weekend, and this chick really messed up by not getting implants. No one likes flat chested girls. Even girls with D’s should get implants, because fake breasts are usually way better than real ones. Implants can be perfect. Natural things suck. Crocodiles, hurricanes, poison ivy, asteroids, B cups. Nothing good ever comes from nature, and girls like Stacy Keibler need to step up.

Challenging Stacy for the weekends most boring Las Vegas pool pictures was Melissa Rycroft, who was down the street hosting a party at The Palazzo. You may be tempted to skip those, but keep in mind that she poses the exact same way in all of them. You’ll be kicking yourself if you miss that.

(3 more pics of Stacy here. hq jump here)

Avril Lavigne is a slut

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 4:51 PM

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If you’re like me, you’ve never once wondered what Avril Lavignes original band was doing now, or if there even was a band, or if they left, or why they left. But the answers are “this“, “yes”, “yes” and “because this guy was banging her”.

Mark Spicoluk & Jesse Colburn appeared on The Surf on BITE TV up here in Canada and revealed that Jesse was “banging avril” during his time in the band but and was hoofed out of the band after she was done with him

I’m gonna have to take this guys word for it because I could name at least 50 DVD menus that are more exciting than that video, and so I turned it off. I did however watch something on the V-22 Osprey. It’s a military plane. With a vertical takeoff. Like a helicopter. So it can do the things a helicopter can do but with the speed and size of a plane. Things like attacking Canada for their boring ass videos, for example.

Lady GaGa is a drunk

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 4:15 PM

Drunk Lady Gaga Posing For Pictures With Fans (USA AND OZ ONLY)

Lady Gaga had a concert in Hamburg Germany last night, and according to the picture source she was “very drunk” and “wearing a dress which looks like lingerie.” Probably because it is lingerie. It confirms what many of us already knew. Rock and roll is the front door to drinking and sex!

(hq jump here.  source = flynet)

Kevin Federline has still got it

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 2:28 PM

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Kevin Federline played golf at the Ryan Sheckler X Games Celebrity Classic outside LA yesterday, although at first I thought it was Winnie the Pooh. And he was smoking. I said, “No Winnie The Pooh, don’t smoke, the kids, they look up to you!” But it’s okay. It’s just KFed. No one looks up to him, so he can do whatever.

Katy Perry got a tat

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 1:25 PM

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But not that one. The one on her chest that says “Josh Grobin” (which is misspelled, I’d like to add. The singer, the one she allegedly stated dating in March, spells his last name Groban) is fake.

But she did get ink on the back of her ankle early this morning in the East Village, though it’s not clear what it is she got exactly. Based on how well the fake tat went, it’s probably a dolphin, or should I say “dollfin”, but instead of fins it has wheels and for some reason it’s black and white like a panda.

(hq jump here.  source = splash news online)

Maybe the worst idea ever

By brendon July 28, 2009 @ 11:34 AM

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The file that holds all the pictures I’ve saved for Tyler over the years is 23.45GB, and there’s just over 32,000 pictures. Inside of that, the pictures are sorted into individual folders. Angelina Jolies folder for example is just under 790MB with 1308 pictures. Britneys is right at 600MB with 1032 pictures.  Megan Fox is 520MB with 545 pictures. Tobey Maguires folder is 32KB, and contained this one picture.

It’s possible I just lost all my exciting Tobey Maguire pictures while moving from computer to computer, from Windows to vastly superior MACs, but more likely is that he’s the most boring superstar actor person thing on earth, completely average in every possible way, and I never bothered to save a second picture.

Needless to say, America has been dying to know what makes Tobey Maguire tick, and now, finally, someone is peering behind the curtain to produce a reality show about his mom and little brother. Page Six says…

WENDY Maguire, mother of “Spider-Man” Tobey Maguire, is about to become a reality TV star — along with Tobey’s younger brother, Weston, 15 — in “Growing Up Maguire.” Bob DeBrino plans to show how Wendy, a single mother, sacrifices to shield her children from the downside of the entertainment industry. Weston — who rides motocross, skateboards and snowboards — will provide plenty of action.

No offense Page Six, but I find it very hard to believe that Weston “will provide plenty of action”.  If he can even manage to throw a baseball without looking like a total queer, I will eat my hat.  And what possible advice could this lady have to protect your kid from the downside of Hollywood, other than “raise a completely unremarkable child that no one will care about.”  Based on “Weston” and “Tobey”, the only good advice she would have is a list if fake names to use if you want to do gay porn.

This picture is a trick

By brendon July 27, 2009 @ 7:25 PM

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If you know what’s good for you, you’ll simply enjoy these lovely thumbnails of Tara Reid on “vacation” in St. Tropez over the weekend. In the thumbnails Tara looks like a human girl, but then you open the pictures and realize you’ve been tricked. The same is true for her boyfriend. He’s just some dork but at first he looked like Sean William Scott. It turns out they look nothing alike. Sean William Not, if you will.

(46 more here. hq jump here. source = wenn and splash news online)

Miranda is a good model – UPDATE

By brendon July 27, 2009 @ 3:25 PM

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Miranda Kerr was in the Caribbean this weekend to shoot for the Victoria’s Secret catalog, and it may seem hard to believe but this was part of it. It’s a smart new approach. This would be a really good ad for hats, for example. A good ad for bras would be to have Marisa Miller completely naked except for a pink cowboy hat and a pink and white two-gun holster. And she could have one of the guns out and she could blow into the barrel like she just shot it. The message would be, you don’t look like this so you better buy our GD bras.

SEXY UPDATE – now with more pics.

(the NSFW pics start here.  source = splash news online)