Drunk Spanish Men Taunt Stupid Bulls Once More

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m all for blood sport. Mano a mano. Davy Crockett taking down a bear with spit and grit. But I don’t understand the thrill of thousands of early morning drunk Spaniards tormenting stupid animals to an early grave. Everybody in... READ MORE

Pamela Anderson Makes Great Decisions

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Like taking Rick Salomon back into her life. After a couple years dedicated strictly to getting supremely loaded and waking up in strange houses, Pam has reconciled with Rick Salomon, the thrice married, unemployed poker playing rich kid lounge-about  To... READ MORE

Courtney Stodden Can’t Or Won’t Stop Showing Off Her New Boobs

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Courtney Stodden has everything a porn star has, except for the actual porn. She’s got the blown out blond hair, the big fake tits, the creepy older man purse holder, and the outfits you see only at adult fetish clubs... READ MORE

I Can’t Help But Feel That Brazil Isn’t Ready for the Soccer World Stage

July 9, 2013 | News | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s a reason all those hot supermodels flee Brazil as soon as they are old enough to have sex with important photographers. So, like 13-14. And the same reason most of the top soccer players head over to Europe... READ MORE

Paris Hilton In A Bikini With Her Dog

July 9, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Like many Americans, Paris Hilton spent the 4th of July holiday giving herpes to her dog. Sorry, that’s not true. Dogs can’t get human herpes. But you can still really disappoint them if they find out you were lying... READ MORE

Kourtney Kardashian Clings to Her White Devil Boyfriend and Growing Obscurity

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A mom can only do so much to train her girls for a life of public attention whoring. Kourtney Kardashian maybe missed the day in home school when Kris Jenner implored the girls to fire up the taboo flames... READ MORE

Suri Cruise Plays At The Beach With Her Pretend Family

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Little Suri Cruise spent the holiday weekend at the beach with the actors hired to portray her loving family. Suri is none the wiser to the fact that paid employees of her famous Scientology father and desperately asexual mother... READ MORE

Look Out Ladies, Here Come the O’Neal Boys

July 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s like watching narcotics in human form walking along the beach. Neither father or son have been the same since Farrah died of ass cancer, and considering they were both drug addicted oft-arrested louses well before her butt went... READ MORE

Breathe Easy World, Tanning Mom Will Be OK

July 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Patricia Krentcil, everyone’s favorite overcooked sausage/shitty mother, is back in rehab after suffering a seizure. It’s unclear but it looks like the seizure was caused by her system trying to adjust to not being bombarded by constant UV radiation... READ MORE

Heidi Klum In A Bikini

July 8, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

You can always tell when a woman’s having lots of sex because they start Tweeting body part pictures of themselves. Women aren’t much different than men. They feel good about themselves when getting laid. If Twitter allowed it and... READ MORE