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Irina Shayk Tries to Save the Olympics

February 6, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

The Winter Olympics in Sochi already suck. Independent of crappy Russian plumbing and the Muslim terrorists and the mass slaughter of canines, it’s the fucking Winter Olympics. It’s a series of sports made up by rich Swiss kids in... READ MORE

Kelly Brook’s Yams Get Paid

February 6, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I guess Kelly Brook didn’t get the memo from Miley Cyrus about how it was sexier for girls to look like puckish boys with gum disease. She’s still going with that big tits and curves and flowing hair cliche.... READ MORE

Meet Philip Seymour Hoffman’s Alleged Drug Connects

February 6, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I guess the rave DJ business isn’t what it used to be, so privileged kid stoner Max Rosenblum and his drama student girlfriend Juliana Luchkiw turned to supplying drugs to fat famous actors hellbent on leaving this planet. Not... READ MORE

Did You Hear the One About the Girl Who Went Trampolining With Khloe Kardashian?

February 6, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Kylie Jenner was rushed to the emergency room after she smashed her face on a trampoline. Apparently, she had the thoughtful idea to bounce on a trampoline with her robust sister Khloe when she ate it and was rushed... READ MORE

Selena Gomez Went to Bieber Rehab

February 6, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When you’ve got a substance addiction, you go to Malibu. When you’re addicted to fucking the wrong kind of people, you jet off to the mountains in Arizona. I think it’s the desert air that magically reminds you to... READ MORE

Victoria’s Secret Celebrated A Made Up Day

February 6, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

As if the company needed a reason to have models show up and stand in one place while blowing kisses and winking at the cameras, Victoria’s Secret celebrated something called Bombshell Day yesterday, and Candice Swanepoel and Karlie Kloss... READ MORE

DMX Has Agreed To Fight George Zimmerman

February 5, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

I don’t know which dictionaries the people behind celebrity boxing are using these days, but the last time I checked, shooting a teenager and becoming the bloated face of both America’s gun control debate and the current state of... READ MORE

NYPD Suddenly Takes Drugs Very Seriously

February 5, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Last night, New York police reportedly arrested four people in connection with actor Philip Seymour Hoffman‘s death, because while heroin is a serious national problem that sends hundreds of people to the ER each day and tens of thousands... READ MORE

Gwyneth Paltrow Neuters Vanity Fair

February 5, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter is not a bad dude. But he is a huge pussy. Lots of guys fall into this category really, particularly high in our Canadian born brethren. There’s no shame in admitting you’ve been bested... READ MORE

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