Dan Aykroyd Not Guilty Of Murder, Only Of Making Shitty Movies

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Dan Aykroyd was the prime suspect in a murder investigation in Canada…for like half an hour. It seems that a sanitation worker was sifting through tons of old garbage at the dump when he came across an old damaged film strip. When he looked closely he saw a man standing over a bloody corpse. So, […]

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Evelyn Lozada Is The Best Prom Date Ever

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

I tried to think if I’ve ever even said Evelyn Lozada‘s name before, and I can’t think of any times that I have, because I don’t really know who she is, other than she married Chad Ochojohnson. But then she agreed to go to some random high school kid’s senior prom and wore a dress […]

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Snooki’s Skeleton Hosted A Cake Eating Contest

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Something called Bridezillas began its 10th season this week, and the people at the WE network celebrated that awful fact with a wedding cake eating contest at the Plaza at Madison Square Garden yesterday. Hosted by Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, the contest featured women of all shapes and sizes, but mostly of the plus variety, dressed […]

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A Woman Got Herpes From Rihanna’s Lipstick

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

A 28-year old woman from Harlem is reportedly suing MAC Cosmetics because she claims that she contracted herpes from using a sample tube of RiRi Woo lipstick at Rihanna‘s show at the Barclays Center in New York City earlier this month. Because Rihanna endorses the lipstick, promotional booths were set up for her fans at […]

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Amanda Bynes Is Not In Buffalo and She’s Not on a Trampoline (VIDEO)

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Unfortunately your browser does not support IFrames. Oh, the shit you do when you’re not on drugs. Like find yourself in Buffalo on a trampoline jumping for an hour. Amanda Bynes denies that she’s the wigged girl in the TMZ photos showing her at the Sky Zone bouncy fun place in Buffalo. But, then, yeah, […]

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Little Hannah Robertson Annoys the Shit Out of McDonald’s

May 31, 2013 | News | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s a big story about how this little eight year old Hannah Robertson confronted the CEO of McDonald’s at the annual shareholder convention. Hannah lectured Mickey D’s about misleading kids into eating junk that’s making them fat and chalky and diabetic. Yay, brave little food warrior. Or maybe not. Because Hannah’s mom is some anti-corporate, […]

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Gisele Bundchen Lost the Babyweight

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Gisele Bundchen is genetically gifted I guess. I don’t know how many babies she’s had with Touchdown Tom now, but she looks better than your average mall mom trucking around her brood. She also looks like she may be made of bronze or some kind of anodized metal, like she could join with four other […]

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Kelly Osbourne On The Cover Of July Cosmo

May 31, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kelly Osbourne is really fucking happy. You’d be happy too if you just found out you lost 18% of your body fat thanks to Photoshop. They also made her look slightly less like an unsuccessful Berlin prostitute from the 1980’s. Then they painted on the real smiles. Photo Credit: Cosmopolitan

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Anais Zanotti And Tahiti Cora In Bikinis

May 31, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I don’t really know who these Miami models are. But their fake names sound really fucking exotic and Anais was once in Playboy Romania. Cracking the titty mags in the former Eastern Bloc — that’s when your absentee father steps out of the woodworks to claim you as his special little girl. Photo Credit: Splash

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