Miley Cyrus can see right through this BS

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 9:16 PM

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Miley Cyrus got into a confrontation with the paparazzi this morning, because while some stars just say they want to protect their family from the spotlight, Miley really SEE‘s it THROUGH. Look. SEE? THROUGH it all, Miley stood FIRM, and tried to NIP this in the bud. POLLS show that people from sea to SEA THREW out many old beliefs about freedom of the press once they could SEE how much of MILEYs family life was being EXPOSED.

(image source = fame)

would you rather do Miley Cyrus or her mom?

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 4:53 PM

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Miley Cyrus and her mom Tish and her little sister the family picture ruiner went to breakfast in Toluca Lake this morning, and her mom kinda looks like porn star Nikki Benz. She’s real skinny with big implants and she has tats and toe rings in the shape of a skull. She looks like she’d let you stick it anywhere and call her degrading names. Miley on the other hand looks like she would cry the whole time. So I’d rather do Mileys mom. I don’t have time for Mileys nonsense. What am I, a social worker?

Arianny Celeste is naked in Playboy

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 2:42 PM

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Playboy has had some questionable celebrity pictorials the past few years, but in the November issue they have UFC octagon girl Arianny Celeste, and you can’t tell because you’re reading this is on the internet, but I was squealing with delight when I wrote that.

This girl is just perfect, and she’s actually naked, unlike some of these idiot celebrities who think Playboy is some kind of towel modeling catalog.

Her entire shoot will be on Playboy.com later this week, but this and this are two of the pics that have leaked. Needless to say she looks incredible, the hottest girl in Playboy in years. I could be in the middle of a plane crash and still jack off to pictures of this girl. Several times.

UNSEXY TERRIFYING UPDATE – wow Playboy was not happy about this. Um, “pictures removed by request”.

Christina Aguilera is single

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 12:55 PM

Body English at The Hard Rock Hotel and Casino Resort

Christina Aguilera met Jordan Bratman in 2002 when he was a producer on one of her albums, and they’ve basically been together ever since. They got married in 2005 and had a son in 2008, but today Us magazine says their relationship might be coming to an end.

Aguilera and Bratman have not yet decided whether to divorce, the source reveals, “they are now living apart, and they will see how that goes.”
“They were very much in love,” explains the insider. “But over the last six months, it ­became clear they were more like friends than husband and wife.”The source adds that Aguilera even “­proposed their August trip to Italy to ­rekindle their relationship, but it didn’t help.”

This would be even cooler if she still looked like she did in 2005. Specifically like she did at this Halloween party. Not really sure why a doctor would handcuff a nurse, but whatever. It’s hard to say what’s different but she looked way way better back then. I bet Hitler is up in heaven, throwing up his hands, blaming it all on Bratman. “I’m not the kind of guy who says ‘I told you so’, but those, you know, THOSE people ruin everything.”

David Arquette admits cheating on Courteney Cox

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 12:01 PM

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Yesterday it was reported that David Arquette maybe had a new girlfriend, 28-year-old bartender Jasmine Waltz, but instead of being happy for him, his wife Courteney Cox decided they should separate after 11 years of marriage.

In her defense, the rumors are true, and Arquette admitted it this morning in an interview with Howard Stern.

(Arquette said) he wasn’t living with Waltz, “but I did have sex with her one time, maybe twice… my sexual encounter made me pretty feel manly.”

Jasmine has also dated Ryan Seacrest, Jesse McCartney and Paris Hilton’s ex Doug Reinhardt. Which is scary. I assume that after you bang Paris Hilton, you pull out of her poisonous vagina and your dick looks like a cigarette that has sat in an ashtray for 30 minutes. A drooping arc of ash that disintegrates when you tap it. Uhh, no thanks. This is my favorite penis. I don’t want anything to happen to it.

(the pictures are Jasmine with McCartney in August of 09 and her alone last night in West Hollywood. source = pacific coast)

Paris Hilton is topless

By brendon October 12, 2010 @ 9:37 AM

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This week sure has been surprising, and not just because of summers unplanned pregnancies that I’m only hearing about now and need to deal with (time to move!) Yesterday there were new topless pictures of Kim Kardashian, and today there are sort of topless pics of Paris Hilton on some bikini photo shoot in Malibu.

She covers her chest for the most part (except for here) which is weird because her tits are clearly her best feature. If she’s gonna hide anything it should be that big dumb face of hers and her one and a half eyes. Someone go punch her in the stomach. That will fix this problem. Actually that will fix both of my problems in this post.

Monday afternoon headlines

By brendon October 11, 2010 @ 6:45 PM

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COURTENEY COX – is single, and has been for a few months. She split from David Arquette after 11 years of marriage because of pictures showing him hanging out with another woman. Hopefully it will be Angelina Jolie, just to watch Jennifer Aniston go all apeshit. (tmz)

MINKA KELLY – is the daughter of a single mom. Who was a stripper. While she raised Minka. If this chick doesn’t do anal, it will shatter everything I think I know about where whores come from. (star)

SPIDERMAN – will have Rhys Ifans as the villain in the reboot starring Andrew Garfield and directed by Marc Webb, though it’s not known what villain he will play. Not that anyone cares. Is this really Spiderman? RV shows have bigger stars than this piece of shit. (hollywood reporter)

SHAYNE LAMAS – is insensitive. She and her awesome tits walked the runway in a breast cancer fashion show in a bikini. They might as well have had her walk to that song, “I Know What Boys Like” for christs sake. (splash)

Kim Kardashian naked, silver

By brendon October 11, 2010 @ 4:37 PM

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Kim Kardashian got completely naked (NSFW pictures here) except for some silver paint for, I have no idea, some magazine (update – W magazine, apparently). Does it even matter. Hopefully it’s for Halloween. This is easily the best robot costume I’ve ever seen.

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