COLIN FARRELL LOOKS … UMM …

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 10:37 AM

The Daily Mail says that Colin Farrell has shed over 40 pounds for a new movie role, in an article apparently written by Colin Farrell or his agent or both.  

Colin Farrell looked slim and toned as he showed off his new ultra-thin physique on the beach in Malibu after his dramatic weight loss for a film role.
Despite his slender frame, the 32-year-old appeared tanned and healthy as he jogged along the beach yesterday.
The Irish heart-throb looked every inch the beach Adonis with his long hair, Celtic tattoos and a sand-covered six-pack.
Farrell has dramatically shed pounds for his role in the upcoming movie, Triage, in which he plays a war photographer.

As a published medical ethicist, I feel it's my duty to call no-way.  What does being a photographer in a movie have to do with looking like this?  Of this were the year 1680, he’d be tried as a witch.



GREATEST TREND EVER

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 10:36 AM

The Wii Fit hula-hoop girl has gotten over 4 million views on youtube, which has inspired other girls to make their own video.  We refer to these girls as, "heroes".  None more so the Playboy Cyber Girl of the Year Jo Garcia, who stripped her 5’7”, 32D-24-32 frame down to her underwear and then did the boxing and snowboarding routines on Wii.  She doesn’t look like much of a boxer, but I'm assuming tricking your attacker into masturbating works just as well as actually hitting him.



ANNE HATHAWAY HAS GOOD TIMING

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 9:50 AM

Anne Hathaway dumped her pretend boyfriend Raffaello Follieri last week, but not because she’s gay as rumored, but because he’d been arrested twice and his constant legal troubles were smearing her good name.  Oh hey guess what happened today?

Manhattan prosecutors say an Italian businessman who has been romantically linked to movie star Anne Hathaway has been arrested on wire fraud conspiracy and money laundering charges.
Raffaello Follieri is due in Manhattan federal court on Tuesday.
He is accused of falsely telling an investor that he had been appointed as the chief financial officer of the Vatican.
Authorities say he claimed that, as a result of that connection, he and others could obtain properties of the Catholic church in the United States at a substantial discount to fair market value.

Well no shit this dude is a fraud. "Raffaello Follieri"?  There’s no way that’s a real name.  It’s too Italian.  It’s the name you would give someone in a skit if you were making fun of Italians, right beside a black guy named Bochevious Midnight and a gay named Dick Sucker.  This mother fucker is from Iowa City I bet, and he learned Italian sounding English from watching old spaghetti sauce commercials.  But actors are idiots and Anne is an actor so there you go.  She came over and he wore a speedo with some gold chains and threw pizza dough in the air, and said, “why you no eata you pasta?  You beautiful girl but you skin and bones, YOU BREAKA MY MAMAS HEART!”  After that she was hooked.

(more pictures from the banner of their lost love here)



BRITNEY IS HOT AGAIN. WAIT NEVERMIND.

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 8:10 AM

Britney Spears is back in LA today after a quick trip down to Kentwood, (home of the Kangaroos) Louisiana to be with her sister Jamie Lynn as she gave birth.  And the first thing Britney did was grab a bikini and hit the pool.  I think that first picture was edited with magic because the rest are disappointing.  Until she looses that gut she should dress in something more appropriate, like a sleeping bag zipped up to her neck or a chocolate cupcake costume.

SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 7:33 AM

Australian Victoria’s Secret supermodel Miranda Kerr and her boyfriend Orlando Bloom hung out topless and naked around the pool yesterday at the Awesome Life Hotel in FanatsyLand, Heaven.  And good for them.  Those two kids deserve a break in life.

(picture source – bauer griffin)



MIKE MEYERS IS GAY. MAYBE.

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 5:31 AM

Yesterday the New York Daily News ran a blind item that asked…

Which divorced comic superstar is exploring a groovy new real-life persona: that of an openly gay man?

And Gawker said the answer was obvious, even though this is the first I’ve ever heard of it.

Some of you commenters told us that the guy we were all guessing. Mike Myers, star of the "groovy baby" catchphrase-apalooza Austin Powers films and the current dud The Love Guru, has been out 'n proud in Toronto for years.

Wait what?  Meyers has been out for years?  Really?  He was married to a girl – in accordance to Gods will – from 1993 to 2005, but maybe his newfound desires were the reason for the divorce.  I can’t picture him with a guy, but I can’t picture him with a girl either.  He’s hard to figure out.  He might be gay, might be a genius, might be both or might be neither.  He’s a blank slate.  Although I’m sort of the same way.  I try to tone things down because I get offended when people just view me as an object of beauty.

(MAN ON MAN UPDATE – talked to my favorite source in the world and they confirmed what Gawker said, fwiw.  the only thing that remains to be seen now is when will Perez start calling him Mike GAYers and then claim he reported this first) 



AMY WINEHOUSE IS CURED

By brendon June 24, 2008 @ 4:48 AM

Amy Winehouse left the hospital in London yesterday after being admitted 8 days ago for … um … "fainting".  The Sun says…

AMY WINEHOUSE looks smiles better after leaving hospital yesterday — in a picture that will give hope to millions of her fans.  She was snapped in a car in London as it was revealed she has mild emphysema — caused by smoking crack cocaine and cigarettes.  But her dad Mitch said she would recover from the lung disease if she quits.  Amy hopes to perform at both Glastonbury and NELSON MANDELA’s birthday concert in London’s Hyde Park this weekend.

And then Amy never did drugs or smoked again.  The End!  Yaay!

Except for yesterday, just minutes after walking out of the hospital, when she had the cigarette in the picture above (from the Daily Mail).  Will she get drunk after this?  Who knows?  When you’re a crack addict on the verge of death, you just have to follow your heart.



LINDA HOGAN IS AN IDIOT

By brendon June 23, 2008 @ 12:13 PM

It takes a previously undiscovered level of dumb to call 911 to say you feel threatened because someone is outside your house, and then tell the operator you’re in the car stalking the person who was supposed to be stalking you as he drives away.  Hey guess what Linda Hogan did this weekend?

Linda: He’s been ordered away because he’s threatened my life before and I don’t want him around I’m shaking, I’m following him until he leaves.
911: Okay, you said he left, or he is leaving?
Linda: Yeah he left, I’m following him right now.  
911: Why are you following him?
Linda: I don’t know
911: Stop following him!  

I think when you’re this dumb, you can be declared legally dead.  I’m gonna have to look into this.  With the right paperwork, we might be able to bury her.