Although rumors that Ashlee Simpson was offered and refused a 4 million dollar offer to appear in Playboy have been proven false or at least wildly exaggerated, it is true that Ashlee has been hired as a new model and spokesperson for Victoria’s Secret. Sky News says:

“But Ash won’t be modeling quite the same lines that the likes of Gisele Bundchen and Heidi Klum have in the past. She’ll be the face (and body, we presume) of a new range, simply entitled Pink, which is aimed at a younger audience. And at 21, they think Ashlee is perfect…”

So, wait, Victoria’s Secret is going from Marissa Miller and Alessandra Ambrosio to Ashlee Simpson. I have to assume we’re talking about two different Ashlee Simpson’s and this is just coincidence, because there’s no way they hired the lip synching one as a model. Because that one is kind of ugly. And unpopular. There’s more people who have a caught a bullet in their teeth than people who would buy a product to be more like Ashlee Simpson.

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Source = Sky News. I know this is where I would normally put up pictures of Ashlee, and 2 and 3 might be of Ashlee. Or maybe not. Turns out, after staring at Jessica’s rack and tongue, I didn’t really care. 

So, it

Even though it made 84 million dollars in its first 5 days of release, ‘Superman Returns’ has not been the record breaking hit many predicted. This is Warner Bothers tent pole movie of the summer, their best bet for a huge hit, and with a budget of 260 million dollars, ‘Superman’ is a long way from breaking even. It’s 84 million doesn’t even come close to the 5 day record of 172 million set by ‘Revenge of the Sith’ or the 152 million earned by ‘Spiderman 2′. It’s not even the best 5 day run this year, with ‘X-Men 3′ earning 130 million dollars in its first week and ‘the Da Vinci Code’ making 92. The future doesn’t look much brighter with ‘Pirates of the Caribbean 2′ opening this Friday. The always great JoBlo.com says:

“Superman’s figures are disappointing overall, when you consider that the film was released during the prime weekend of the year, cost more than any other movie this year and had so many positive reviews going for it. In the grand scheme of 5-day release figures, it only managed a 30th place showing, behind films such as BRUCE ALMIGHTY, PLANET OF THE APES and yes…even X-MEN 3!”

My hope is that this is struggling because everyone knows Bryan Singer movies are boring. Because both of his ‘X-Men’ movies were boring, mostly made up of scenes where one male character went off to a dimly lit room with one female character. Were they fighting or playing Five Minutes in Heaven, it was hard to tell, but Singer seemed to think this would be exciting. Another reason ‘Superman’ might be dying is because people started to hear about the blatantly anti-American tone he painted the great American superhero movie with. Which is not only wildly offensive, but also just plain wrong. Being American is fuckin terrific. That’s why in the bible it says if God didn’t make you American, it’s because he hates you.



Source = JoBlo and Box Office Mojo


Okay, a few of these pictures of Coco Arquette pulling back the top of mom Courtney Cox were all over Friday, but I didn’t put those up because they were small and the quality sucked. These are better. It even looks like Coco checks with the paparazzi first to give them a sign she’s about to deliver the money shot, per their agreement. Here’s another kid who is absolutely doomed. Dad is a dangerous lunatic who signed off on the name Coco, mom is a billionaire MILF who every boy she ever brings home is gonna want to do, and the uncle used to be a guy but is now a girl. According to science, there’s a 190 percent chance Coco ends up bi and with an eating disorder. Wait, did I say “doomed”? I meant to say “awesome”.

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Gwyneth Paltrow has already completed one single and is now working on a complete album with William Orbit, who produced and co-wrote Madonna's 'Ray of Light' album. Paltrow apparently has no plans to work with husband Chris Martin, the lead singer of Coldplay, but music is not completely new to Paltrow – her cover version of 'Cruisin' with Huey Lewis on the 'Duets' soundtrack went to number 1 on Billboard's Adult Contemporary Chart in 2000. But this promises to be much different from that. Orbit Says:

"We bumped into each other and got talking and it turned out she was keen to do some recording. We've already done a track which will make a brilliant first single."

Oh, those kids are so lucky! Moses and Apple. Especially Moses, with his dopey name and a mom much more concerned with recording albums and insulting America and England in the papers. I predict nothing but happiness for him in grade school. Always the first one picked for kickball, class president, quick with a joke and a tiger with the ladies – I can see it now!
Source = MTV 

Janet Jackson must not think very much of us if she’s gonna stick to her claim that diet and exercise are all she used to lose the 1500 pounds that magically disappeared from her ass. If anyone from law enforcement is reading this, I don’t know anything about steroids. For everyone not in law enforcement, I know a lot about steroids. And I know what diet and exercise looks like after 6 months, and I know what 2 cycles of Winstrol looks like after 6 months. Hey, guess what category Janet Jackson falls under. Human beings simply don’t go from this to the pictures below in 6 months. The South Beach diet and a treadmill aren’t gonna turn a bulldog into a greyhound. And if anyone thinks Janet would never do anything like that, uhhh … she’s a Jackson. She’s Michael Jackson’s sister. Steroids would be the most normal thing anyone in that family has done in 15 years. She could morph into the She-Hulk at Christmas dinner, tear off her shirt and scream “ROWR!” and it would still rank in the top 5.

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note – okay, obviously I didn’t see her shoot up, so legally speaking I’m not saying she did steroids, but if you don’t know, not all steroids are the same. They aren’t all designed to make you bigger. Winstrol is a classic and very popular steroid made to rip away every ounce of fat and leave you absolutely shredded. Like Janet.


Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey could be officially divorced next week after both signed the paperwork today to request a superior court judge be appointed “for the sole purpose of” ending the couple’s marriage. The judge is being asked to legally end the marriage without settling all the financial details of the split. Money has been the main sticking point to finalizing the divorce so far. Immediately after the separation, Lachey rejected a settlement offer and reserved the right to petition for alimony. EW says:

“Despite Simpson reportedly offering Lachey $1.5 million in way of settlement, according to Californian law the former 98 Degrees singer is entitled to half of Jessica

Jessica Alba seems to have lost a remarkable amount of weight lately. Which sucks because otherwise I could open picture 3 and look down her shirt and actually see something. But it is fun staring at the tattoo on the small of her back that I never noticed before, because it