theres no f**king way

Conan O'Briens final 'Tonight Show' was two weeks ago tomorrow, and last week NBC managed to go all 5 days without embarrassing themselves in some new fascinating way. It was the beginning of a new era, one where they would stop looking like incompetent retards, an era... read more

brittany murphy could have been saved

The LA County Coroner has determined that Brittany Murphy died on Dec. 20 at the age of 32 due to pneumonia and an iron deficiency anemia exacerbated by multiple drug intoxication. A toxicology report detailing what those drugs might have been is complete but won't be... read more

thursday morning headlines

BIG BANG THEORY - with the laugh track removed is confusing. How will I know if a joke has been told? They should have a blinking light system in the corner that tells me when to laugh. Green means laugh, Yellow means it's time to catch your breath from laughing, and... read more

tiger leaves rehab this week

For the first time in over two months, Tiger Woods may have something to be happy about because Radar says he will finish his time at a sex rehab today or tomorrow, and his wife Elin Nordegren has already arrived in Hattiesburg, Mississippi to pick him up. But in even... read more

lindsay is a hoarder

Back in May, the LAPD investigated a burglar alarm at Lindsay Lohans house, and the place was such a mess, the Daily Mail said this… ... no-one had entered the house and nothing had been stolen, but the place was so messy that police had to contact Lindsay - who is... read more

annalynne mccord forgot something

'90210' star AnnaLynne McCord went to work yesterday and was nice enough to wear a thin white tshirt that might as well have been made out of glass. I don't know why she's so awesome, but I don't know why she's dressed all in white and the black guy is dressed all in... read more

pete wentz is unemployed

In news that will surprise the people who knew this band was still together, Pete Wentz announced on his blog yesterday that he was no longer a member of Fall Out Boy. (I) cant predict that id ever play in fall out boy again. not due to personal relationships as much as... read more

this is getting sad(der)

Last week, Pam Anderson did an in-store promotional appearance at the Virgin Records on Sunset the Apple Store on 5th Avenue the Rite Aid drug store in Nerbeth, Pennsylvania. "How degrading," said a girl who stars in porn movies where guys pee on her. The good news is... read more

this is gross

The Sun is reporting that Madonna and her boyfriend Jesus Luz broke up yesterday and surprisingly enough it was Jesus who initiated the split, saying the difference in their age was too much to overcome. Which is sort of the point to this. It's weird enough that she's 51... read more

morning headlines

CONAN O'BRIEN - is one step closer to a deal with Fox, with CEO Rupert Murdoch saying, "If the programming people can show us we can do it and make a profit, we would do it in a flash." Conan is real popular with college students, so maybe one good way to make money... read more

pray for simon monjack

The alternate headline for this was, "People who read Tyler are fucking cool/smartasses", because above is the email and response from the fake charity Simon Monjack set up yesterday announcing a party to cash out on his wife's death, hoping that Hollywoods genuine... read more

tuesday afternoon headlines

POINTLESS NUDITY - Playboy model Tiffany Ryan is short, skinny, and has huge breasts. If she were Asian with dark red hair she'd be the perfect human girl, a quantum leap in genetic evolution, an event so without precedent that many would claim she was a god, and her... read more