Arnie Making Up For Lost TIme

For all the emasculation of men headquartered in Hollywood, Arnold Schwarzenegger is earning traditional paternal points the old fashioned way: spending quality time with the boy he made with the fat Guatemalan housekeeper. read more

Madison Beer Walks the Puppy

Coming to Hollywood as a high school dropout to be a star and making enough to pay the rent but not enough that you're working more than a day a week leaves plenty of free time. Your mom isn't even pretending to be watching anymore. read more

Arianny Celeste Booty Is Astounding And Shit Around The Web

Arianny Celeste's booty is featured in this sexy video. She's got one freaking job and she does it so well. Two if you count carrying placards featuring the numbers 1-3. read more

Amber Rose Still Winning

Following a successful Slut Walk LA where she pocketed a few grand while accomplishing nothing, Amber Rose is back Dancing With the Stars. Somewhere between burning letters into the foreheads of the village strumpets and placing them on a pedestal and forcing the... read more

Krista Miller Pushing the Meth

Krista Miller sounds like somebody you know, but she isn't. Unless you're up on your Filipina young partying TV celebrities. She's pretty hot which makes her instantly relevant, even more so when busted for peddling meth outside Manila. read more

'Man Rules' Coming Very Soon (Blatant Self-Promotion)

While all you kids were doing your Adderrall and video games and furry cosplay cuddle parties, I was busy writing a book. It's going to be on Amazon and wherever else books are sold. So, just Amazon. Man Rules. It's a guide for Millennial Males on how to be men again. read more

Digital Celebrities Even Worse Than Their Previous Counterparts

20-somethings have always been tools. You were never aware because they didn't have social media channels. It's unclear how we went from the Greatest Generation to the two YouTube "stars" individually tearfully announcing their young divorce. It's only clear that the... read more

Brody Jenner Almost Stood Up For Himself

All you need to say about a man is that he's a 33-year old Malibu DJ and you have enough. Bachelor Little League volunteer is next on the list. Bruce's straight son, Brody, made a short-lived attempt at being socially relevant when he "Amen'd" a buddy's Instagram post... read more

Kelly Osbourne Settles

Kelly Osbourne has come to an undisclosed legal resolution with Michelle Pugh, the hairdresser who was focusing heavily on dad's bangs over the course of eighteen months. At the time the affair came to light, the Osbourne daughter squarely put the blame on her father's... read more

Jury's Still Out On Kim Kardashian Robbery

Most people's first reaction upon hearing Kim Kardashian was bound and gagged and robbed in Paris was this is obvious bullshit. Also, history please don't judge us incorrectly, we weren't all into fat chicks. read more

Steven Avery Dumps Fiancee From The Slammer

Steven Avery of Making a Murderer fame and also local Throwing A Cat Into A Bonfire and Masturbating on His Female Cousin's Car Hood fame has broken off his engagement with legal secretary Lynn Hartman after just nine days. read more

Adriana Lima Is the Shit And Shit Around The Web

This video of Adriana Lima's hottest looks has got my pressure up. Fries and gravy has the same effect, only they label you a weirdo if you masturbate openly to the latter. read more