White Michael Jackson Sickens Paris

There remains a not large, but not insignificant Michael Jackson fan base of largely heavyset women who idolized Jackson in his life, and beatified him in his death. Those very same hordes went ballistic when it was announced the very white actor Joseph Fiennes would be... read more

These El Moussas Seem Like Very Practical El Moussas

Tarek and Christina El Moussa are filming a new season of Flip or Flop for HGTV despite their very public split and Tarek's recent legal filing for spousal support. A happy working couple show starring a husband and wife currently divorcing and fucking other people would... read more

Good for the Weeknd, Go Get Some

The Weeknd has established a solid niche for himself. Both professionally with his pop music, iconic hair, and Michael Jackson styled voice, and more importantly, in fucking famous young pop culture chicks. read more

Victoria Beckham Pens a Letter to Her 18-Year Old Self

Women's magazines are fond of the literary conceit where vapid older celebrities write advice letters to their younger celebrity self. It's a conspicuously inane exercise for women who spend hours a day discussing shoes. Also, Kobe Bryant. read more

Leah McSweeney Smears Michael Che

Leah McSweeney is the creator of a clothing line called Married to the Mob, popular among Planned Parenthood regulars and hoes who spend a lot of time in all-inclusive resorts. read more

Steve Harvey Bonafide Idiot

Steve Harvey went on TV and said some shit that was actually racist. Not something fake racist involving a comic book character being hashed out by idiots on Twitter. Concretely racist. It's almost refreshing in a way. You want to rub Lena Dunham's face in it. read more

Jessica Hart Making Thirty Work

Running backs and models rarely make it to thirty still working. Jessica Hart feels fortunate to be booking paid swimsuit and lingerie gigs at thirty. That's seventeen years into her career, having been discovered at thirteen for her first magazine gig. read more

Johnny Manziel Charging Fifty Bucks For Selfies

Ronda Rousey claiming "rock bottom" is laughable when simply reading the next sports news headline. Johnny Manziel has been booked by sports merchandise store in the Houston area to sell autographs and take paid selfies at two of their area mall store locations. read more

Maria Sharapova In A Tiny Bikini In Hawaii And Shit Around The Web

Tennis hottie Maria Sharapova showed off her bikini body in Hawaii. Now that she's doped her way out of tennis, it's important to look your best. That was flippant, but also true. read more

Kylie Jenner Big Cleavage Leaving Nice Guy

The full and complete consideration of Kylie Jenner is her nineteen year old body. It's not horribly sexist if it's true. Women can't throw a football. Men can't pee cleanly in the dark. read more

Paris Hilton Getting Some in Mexico

It's not altogether flattering that at thirty-five you're in the news for making out on the beach with some dude. The press is in a furor because Paris Hilton was on some Mexican shoreline rolling around with a dude in jeans and no shirt which screams of foreign escort. read more

Maddie Ziegler Memoirs Coming, Hang On

Maddie Ziegler is the prepubescent dancing sensation who made virtual angry love to Shia LaBeouf in numerous disturbing Sia music videos about child rape and unicorns. read more