Mo'Nique Thinks Like a Man (VIDEO)

Fat actress Mo'Nique went on the show The Preachers with her husband to talk about how they openly fuck other people. You weren't expecting that when you tuned into The Preachers. Though yes for every single other TV show on during business hours. Already divorced and making good money and wanting more babies, Mo'Nique went and married her high school buddy Sydney Hicks. Contrary to popular myth, it was Mo'Nique who...

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Josephine Skriver Hot In Lingerie And Shit Around The Web

Everyman should be able to experience the ups and downs of dating at least one wildly attractive model in their lifetime. A three month jaunt through erections and emotional hurricane. I didn't move your damn Menthols. Can we still fuck? I'm packing my bag because you're not answering my last question.

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Kate Hudson Bikini Pimp

Kate Hudson has spent the past year traveling the world's celebrity hot spots in a bikini or less. In case you miss the constant tabloid stories raving about her amazing mom body, she has you covered on social media with shots of her bare ass cartwheels and reverse crab positions only the limber teens can maintain for an extended porn scene.

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Emma Roberts in A Bikini

Emma Roberts has Eric Roberts blood coursing through her veins. She's playing with borrowed time. That beat down she put on her boyfriend is a classic sign her close associates will choose to ignore when interviewed as to how Roberts found herself up in a bell tower with a rifle and Facebook live manifesto regarding recycling.

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Jennifer Aniston Scolds the Celebrity Media

Jennifer Aniston turned to the all white soul cycling female editorial bastion Huffington Post to scold the shit out of gossip rags for their intrusive running commentary on her personal life. She neglected to mention the premium celebrity magazine outlets with whom she's worked a mutually beneficial public relations campaign for the past two decades.

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John Cena Creeping

When you see an All-American hero like John Cena fronting Ad Council PSA's broad-brushing white males a bunch of bigots, understand he's got a bigger business move pending. None of this politically correct genuflecting happens in a vacuum. Two weeks later, Cena announced a deal with Leftfield Entertainment to produce reality shows based around his socially tolerant strong man persona.

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Draymond Green Seems Like An Asshole

Draymond Green has a serious personality disorder if you couldn't tell by his continued willingness to kick or punch people in the nuts while playing basketball. Also, his general Ultimate Warrior histrionics. He was arrested and released for slapping a guy near the Michigan State campus where he was no doubt dismayed to find out none of the chicks know who he is.

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Taylor Swift Bonafide Sociopath

Calvin Harris is a DJ, although he actually produces some of the music unlike Paris Hilton who has someone assist her to press Play on an iPod and then stands there with a butt plug in. Harris dated Taylor Swift for a spat because she wanted to diversify her portfolio. I've fucked athlete, actor, rapper, musician, and artist. What about DJ? This sex thing isn't all it's cracked up to be, it's just super numb down...

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The Mr. Skin Podcast Is Here, Fucking Finally

I like guys who like guy stuff. I know some percent of them are secretly wearing their mother's stolen underwear, but I also know my dentist probably runs a BDSM basement. Just fix my cavity. Dudes who openly appreciate antiquing are never to be given the keys to the kingdom. Mr. Skin has spent the last nearly twenty years sharing videos and photos of actress' tits. Obama won a Nobel Prize. You tell me who earned the...

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Memphis Bleek Belly Up

There was a time when fans argued over rappers and you at least sort of recognized the artist names cited. Ten guys filled up ninety percent of discussion outside that one dumbass who'd mention a street kid in Dayton who was the rage on underground mixtapes. Now it's all street kids from Dayton. Every black 20-something with an idiotic moniker is likely to link you to an urban blog site talking about who he's beefing...

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Harry Potter Mandrake Baby Reminds Us That It's Not Abuse If It's Viral

Bartertown mores were levels superior to the jaded exhibitionism culture of social media. It's one thing to share your amazing salads. Your lunch, your call. Cosplaying with your newborn for that perfect viral photo seems short sighted.

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Joanna Krupa Topless And Shit Around The Web

Joanna Krupa denies any past as a paid escort. She also is legally denying that her snatch smells like day old hamachi. However she's not denying us a look at her bare breasts, so pinch your nose and take a peek.

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Model Joy Corrigan Not Quite in A Bikini

If mothers could set aside straight-faced 'you can be an engineer' chats with their teen daughters and teach them how to secure their bikini tops after sunbathing on their stomaches, they'd be imparting a far more practical life skill. Never let a man see your tits if you're not being paid or potentially proposed to.

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Victoria Beckham Lonelier Than Usual

Victoria Beckham shared a photo of herself kissing her daughter on the lips because she understands news media cycles even better than Trump. Models who don't show off their bodies on social media quickly run out of ideas.

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Maitland Ward Pants-less

It's hard to measure the precise moment at which you begrudgingly accept every struggling soul as worthy of some praise. Search for that spirit crushing feeling after you bed down the girl at college you felt sorry for during Freshman year because you just assumed she'd never find a guy.

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