Oscar Pistorius Does The Funky Chicken (VIDEO)

Oscar Pistorius wobbled around on his nubs during his murder sentencing trial in an attempt to show the judge he's going to have a hard time in prison. Should have thought about that when you were shooting your girlfriend through the bathroom door with hollow point bullets, a real pussy move that can be accomplished sitting on your ass.read more

Hot Valedictorian Illegals and Meg Ryan Madame Puppet Face in the Last Men on Earth Podcast #48 (AUDIO)

On this week's Last Men on Earth podcast we discuss the fucked up Meg Ryan face, dudes donating their sperm to lesbians in Target bathrooms, porn stars being tit punched, Valedictorians screeching about their illegal status, and celebrities making Orlando all about themselves. All the news that was unfit to print elsewhere because other news outlets are owned by Scientologists and Canadians.read more

Kim Kardashian Fuckable Posedown

Kim Kardashian was selected to cover GQ magazine's Love Sex and Madness edition wherein the periodical uses pre-screened responses from a celebrity's public relations representatives to provide relationship advice to their softly metrosexual readers. GQ promises this is Kim Kardashian as you've never seen her before. So clothes and no black dick in her ass.read more

Marloes Horst Shows Her Yum-Yums And Shit Around The Web

Marloes Horst is one of those supermodels that kind of looks like every other supermodel. Still, that supermodel just happens to be super fucking hot. And now she's topless.read more

Mara Wilson Jumps the Gay Plight Train

Nothing says I got your back, Orlando, like announcing that you're now identifying as queer even though you're not. Everybody has their own form of empty gestures of support. Switching teams really is the most dramatic. In the wake of the Pulse nightclub shootings, child actress Mara Wilson has declared she's bisexual because she partied at a gay bar as a teen.read more

Bella Thorne Shares Her Colonoscopy

It's impossible to over-share on social media. Tales of stupidity become LOL stories. Plastic surgery scars are accepted as war stories. You can document floaters in your bowl and you'd get ten thousand flower emojis. It's hard to blame the entertainer for sinking to lowest common denominator content when the audience is demanding dullard content.read more

Ava Sambora See Through Bikinis

What if Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora made a baby and she turned eighteen and started modeling revealing bikinis? That immortal question didn't take long to answer.read more

Lock This Bitch Up

The Orlando shooter's wife said she drove her gay zealot husband around to scout locations for him to shoot up, including Disney World. She was aware what he was about to do and tried to talk him out of it. This isn't a situation where the dude's threatening self harm with a spatula, maybe you should have called the fucking police. She was also with him when he bought the guns and ammo. So, she's a fucking terrorist.read more

Charlie Sheen Still Winning

Charlie Sheen just picked up a condom endorsement which is akin to Melissa McCarthy doing a spot for lettuce. Just weeks ago he was supposedly moving to Mexico to cure his AIDS with arthritic goat milk and become the modern day Elvis Sighting and now he's talking about returning to television. He's also not having as much unprotected sex with unsuspecting strangers as he used to:read more

Kylie Jenner Nipple Barking

If Kim Jong-un got caught taking a leak next to his car outside the football stadium you'd probably be able to put it in context of his larger crimes. Nobody is accused of genocide and public urination in the same damning sentence.read more

Scarlett Leithold in A Bikini And Shit Around The Web

In heaven, every man receives a chick in a bikini who looks just like this. Now, go blow some shit up and get your ass there before the ones without herpes are all taken. Allahu Akbar.read more

If You Have to Explain Your Tattoo With a Wiki Cut and Paste...

Keke Palmer got a new tattoo that reads Queen of Kush and she wants to make sure everybody understands it has nothing to do with what everybody thinks it means. That she likes to smoke a ton of reefer. Unlike every other tattoo vaguely about marijuana that turns out to be about marijuana, Palmer wants to set the record straight:read more

Phoebe Price And Ana Braga Working It, But Who's Paying?

You can view those stories of 30-something career minor league ballplayers hanging on for their shot as inspiring tales of commitment to a dream or profiles in futility. There's a rich psychological profiling that can be done based upon your answer. Phoebe Price has spent the better part of fifteen years hoping that showing off her tit and ass freckles in Beverly Hills will get her work.read more

Photos of Slender Women No Longer Allowed on London Public Transit

The new London Mayor has declared that there will no longer be images of fit or slender women on advertisements on public transits because those impossibly toned bodies make many women and girls feel shitty. Some are suggesting that London's first Muslim Mayor, Sadiq Khan, is stepping toward a Sharia type banning of uncovered women. But it's far more likely he's pandering to the modern politically correct culture where...read more

Khloe Kardashian Has Changed

There's never been an oblong duckling who's worked harder, spent more money, or cried more tears to Jesus to be pretty like her whore sisters than Khloe Kardashian. A constant barrage of surgeries and implants and cinches and bleaching and lasers has turned Khloe Kardashian into some type of perfect black baller cupcake of sex. The question can never be, was it all worth it, it has to be, what was the alternative.read more