01.24.2012 is this Khloe Kardashians’ real dad (on the right)?

Fox cites a few sources today in suggesting that Khloe Kardashians real father is a man named Alex Roldan, who has been Kris Jenners hairdresser for over 30 years.

Now, this would imply that a hairdresser with a salon in West Hollywood had sex with a woman, which seems unlikely, but he is over 6 feet tall, which might account for Khloes height, and her middle name is Alexandria, but more than anything there’s a clip of him in this absolutely unbearable video that Kris Jenner made when she was 30 (yes she’s been an attention whore for that long). Just look at this .gif of it, because HOLY FUCK YES. That’s absolutely her father.

He looks exactly like her. Fuck, he looks so much like her it makes me wonder if Kris is even Khloes mom. Was there even a mom? It’s looks more like the dude just cloned himself. Maxi-Me.

Tags: alex roldan, khloe kardashian, kim kardashian, kris jenner |

33 Comments

01.24.2012 Angelina Jolie hates Stacy Keibler. Or doesn’t.

George Clooney, Stacy Keibler, Brad Pitt, and Angelina Jolie all shared a private jet to the Palm Springs Film Festival, and Us magazine makes it perfectly clear that Angelina hated Stacy for every second of it.

“Angelina refused to acknowledge that Stacy was even on the plane … (She) went out of her way to ignore her, from takeoff to landing. She would not even look Stacy’s way. She was not having it!”

MEE-OW!!! Except that it isn’t true, according to Stacy Keibler.

“That (story) is completely false. She has been nothing but great and nice to me. That’s 100 percent false… I’ve hung out with them a couple of times and they’ve been nothing but nice.”

If there was any tension on that plane it was probably because Brad and George were both waiting for someone to suggest an orgy, or at least that they switch partners. Jokingly at first, just to break the ice, but then, you know, maybe not jokingly.

11 photos in gallery >

Tags: angelina jolie, brad pitt, george clooney, stacy keibler |

31 Comments

01.24.2012 Zooey Deschanel also likes bunnies

I’m as amazed as anyone but ‘New Girl’ is genuinely funny, the best new comedy since ‘Community’, thanks in large part to it’s perfect casting (namely Jake Johnson and Max Greenfield, and now they’ve added the great Lizzy Caplan). But the star of the show of course is Zooey Deschanel, seen here with a purse shaped like a bunny. It seems she and Jennifer Garner have a little theme going. That theme being: “women buy stupid shit”.

(image source = bauer griffin)

8 photos in gallery >

Tags: zooey deschanel |

23 Comments

01.24.2012 Jennifer Garner stands up to PETA

Spectacularly pregnant Jennifer Garner was out in Santa Monica yesterday, and at first her little bunny iPhone cover may seem cute, and a typically Jennifer Garner thing to have, but it’s actually made from 4 real bunnies. JENNIFER GARNER IS CONTROVERSIAL!

(image source = fame)

7 photos in gallery >

11 Comments

01.24.2012 it’s the 2012 Academy Award nominees

The 84th Academy Award nominees were announced early this morning in LA, with Martin Scorsese’s ‘Hugo’ headlining things with 11 nominations, followed by silent movie ‘The Artist’ getting 10. Other things that jump out are ‘Drive’ getting shut out, Michael Shannon not getting a nomination for ‘Take Shelter’, the Dean of Greendale Community College nominated as a writer for best adapted screenplay, and two nominations for ‘Bridesmaids’ (supporting actress and screenplay).

Overall this list is pretty shitty. It’s boring, AND the show has Billy Crystal for a host. Which means I will have shot a flaming arrow into my TV by about the 20 minute mark.

Best Picture 
The Artist 
The Descendants 
Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close 
The Help
 Hugo
 Midnight in Paris
 Moneyball 
The Tree of Life
 War Horse

Best Director
 Michel Hazanavicius, The Artist 
Alexander Payne, The Descendants 
Martin Scorsese, Hugo 
Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris
 Terrence Malick, The Tree of Life

Best Actor 
Demián Bichir, A Better Life 
George Clooney, The Descendants 
Jean Dujardin, The Artist
 Gary Oldman, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
 Brad Pitt, Moneyball

Best Actress
 Glenn Close, Albert Nobbs 
Viola Davis, The Help 
Rooney Mara, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
 Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady 
Michelle Williams, My Week With Marilyn

Best Supporting Actor
 Kenneth Branagh, My Week With Marilyn 
Jonah Hill, Moneyball 
Nick Nolte, Warrior 
Christopher Plummer, Beginners
 Max Von Sydow, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

Best Supporting Actress 
Bérénice Bejo, The Artist
 Jessica Chastain, The Help 
Melissa McCarthy, Bridesmaids 
Janet McTeer, Albert Nobbs 
Octavia Spencer, The Help

Best Original Screenplay 
Michel Hazanavicius, The Artist
 Annie Mumolo & Kristen Wiig, Bridesmaids 
J.C. Chandor, Margin Call
 Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris 
Asghar Farhadi, A Separation

Best Adapted Screenplay 
Alexander Payne, Jim Rash & Nat Faxon, The Descendants 
John Logan, Hugo 
George Clooney, Grant Heslov & Beau Willimon, The Ides of March
 Aaron Sorkin & Steven Zaillian, Moneyball
 Peter Straughan & Bridget O’Connor, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Tags: 2012 academy awards, 2012 award season |

22 Comments

01.24.2012 Seal is still wearing his wedding ring

This won’t make a ton of sense, but yesterday, just a few hours after Heidi Klum and Seal announced that they were getting a divorce and ending their 7 year marriage, Seal was wearing his wedding ring and saying how awesome Heidi Klum is on the Ellen Degeneres show:

“Yes, I am still wearing my ring. I think it’s just pretty much a token of how I feel about this woman. We have eight years.
“Just because we have decided to separate doesn’t necessarily mean you take off your ring and you’re no longer connected to that person.
“We will be connected in many ways ‘til the rest of our lives.”

It’s a good thing Seal has always seemed so dignified, because that could have easily sounded creepy instead of romantic. Especially with him looking so, I don’t know, so “tribal”. I’d be scared to date Heidi next. He looks like he’d eat your heart to gain your powers.

(image source = pacific coast)

5 photos in gallery >

Tags: heidi klum, seal |

11 Comments

01.23.2012 Cameron Diaz is scaring the French now

Cameron Diaz traveled all the way to Paris for the 2012 Versace Spring/Summer show earlier today, all part of Paris Fashion Week. Perhaps coincidentally, reports of the loup garou, a fabled French monster that eats the bones of children, has skyrocketed in the past 24 hours.

(image source = splash, inf)

14 photos in gallery >

Tags: cameron diaz |

83 Comments

01.23.2012 Britney is getting her own money as a wedding gift

Britneys Spears father, who is either very generous or too cheap to buy a real present, will give up his conservatorship as a wedding gift to Britney, allowing her full control over her finances (and an empire estimated at around $200 million) for the first time in 5 years.

Her father Jamie has been conservator of her affairs since her life spiralled out of control in 2007.
But as a special gift to mark her upcoming wedding to fiance Jason Trawick, Britney’s father is asking a judge to halt the conservatorship.

When Jason heard the news, he sat back in a big leather chair, tapped the tips of his fingers together and said, “Eexxcellent. Everything is going exactly as planned”, then laughed maniacally.

5 photos in gallery >

Tags: britney spears, jason trawick |

14 Comments

01.23.2012 Vanessa Hudgens erotic awakening continues

Vanessa Hudgens and her boyfriend Austin Butler were still in Hawaii this weekend, romantically holding each other in the water and watching the sunset. It looked like an ad for Sandals. Or condoms.

(image source = fame)

14 photos in gallery >

Tags: bikini, vanessa hudgens |

10 Comments

01.23.2012 Heidi Klum is single

Heidi Klum and Seal have had 4 kids during their seemingly happy 7 year marriage, but now those kids are orphans or whatever because Klum and Seal are getting a divorce. Last night, they released this controversial statement…

“We have had the deepest respect for one another throughout our relationship and continue to love each other, but our six-year-old son Henry still wets the bed. It’s so embarrassing! We can’t even have his friends over anymore because he’ll pee on them. I don’t know what his deal is. He must like it, the little pervert. Does sham-wow make sheets? Because we’d buy some. Anyway, this led to a lot of tension in the house and that led to fights. So thanks a lot you little dick! Way to ruin our family.”

Wow, nice job Henry. Hey look, your mom is crying again, is this what you wanted, are you happy now?

6 photos in gallery >

Tags: divorce, heidi klum, seal |

19 Comments

01.23.2012 Steven Tyler is patriotic

They say that the national anthem is one of the hardest songs to sing, and yesterday at the AFC Championship game between New England and Baltimore Steven Tyler proved them right. He better watch out. Ray Lewis has stabbed people for less.

Tags: american idol, steven tyler |

6 Comments

01.23.2012 Joe Paterno died

Joe Paterno died early Sunday morning, though not of shame like you would have thought. It was actually lung cancer. A statement from his family says, “he died as he lived.” By mumbling and shielding a pedophile.