Ali Lohan is doing great

By brendon December 15, 2011 @ 11:36 AM

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Some people think Ali Lohan is about to die because she clearly has an eating disorder, but I would argue that life isn’t worth living if you don’t have a nice ass, and this is as good as hers has ever looked.

Is she so skinny now that gravity doesn’t work on her anymore? I don’t know, what am I, an astronaut? But if so, isn’t that what we all want? To slip the surly bonds of earth and touch the face of God? Ali is a hero, she’s showing us what we can do if we really apply ourselves!

(image source = flynet)

Howard Stern is the new Americas Got Talent host

By brendon December 15, 2011 @ 11:03 AM

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NBC announced this morning that Howard Stern will replace Piers Morgan as the third judge on ‘America’s Got Talent’, which will move from LA to New York to accommodate his radio show. And he’ll no doubt be great, but it would be even better if they also replaced Nick Cannon, who is completely useless. All he does is read an introduction off a card, then clap and say, “daammmnnn, that was hot. Sharon, what did you think?” He has no improv skills whatsoever. When he drives he must sit at traffic lights for hours because he can’t think fast enough to hit the gas before it turns red again.

(story source = the ap, image source of Sterns wife = fhm)

its the top half of the Dark Knight Rises trailer

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 5:03 PM

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Fans were thrilled to learn that ‘the Dark Knight Rises’ would have a 7 minute trailer playing before ‘Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol’, but then became less thrilled when told it would be in IMAX theaters only. Then even less thrilled when told it was actually just 70MM IMAX theaters only.

Because there are only 42 of those.

The rest of us are left with this. Bootleg copies showing the top of Catwomans head and with audio at least 2 seconds out of sync. This could show Bruce Wayne at a lemon party for all I can tell. (And yet it’s still completely badass and this alone would be the best movie of the summer.)

5TH UPDATE: BETTER AUDIO ON THE COPY HERE. BANE IS MUCH MORE LEGIBLE ON THIS ONE.

Cameron Diaz and Diddy are dating or something

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 4:13 PM

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Cameron Diaz and Sean Combs had lunch together last month, leading some to wonder if they were dating. Now it’s being reported that Diaz was at Marble Lane in New York on Saturday with some friends when Combs showed up around 1:15am and started buying drinks. Then they danced and “made out” for the next two hours.

Conclusion: Sean Combs has horrible taste in everything, not just music.

Lindsay was back in court today

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 3:39 PM

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Lindsay Lohan (*) had a grand old time in court today during her probation hearing, which, if you ask me, is how court should be for a professional burglar with multiple DUI arrests. TMZ explains why things are going so well this time…

Judge Sautner tried something new … rather than just telling Lindsay to complete her community service in a year — or else — the judge created a very specific schedule, putting in a certain number of hours each month.  And Lindsay has not only complied, she’s gone beyond the minimum.

Everyone knows Lindsay is a spoiled fuckup, but this really put things in context. Rarely is “gone beyond the minimum” a compliment, much less cause for celebration because it’s the nicest thing a supervisor has ever said about you. That Lindsay is one amazing lady.

(*) who couldn’t be bothered to show up on time to promote Playboy on Ellen DeGeneres yesterday, but did manage to make the Jay Z concert at Staples Center last night. image source = getty and splash

AnnaLynne McCord is a real trooper

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 2:39 PM

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AnnaLynne McCord filmed some hot tub scenes for ‘90210’ yesterday, at the Ritz-Carlton in Marina del Rey from the looks of it, which is noteworthy because it’s December. The only thing worse than being cold is being cold and wet, and the only thing worse than that is being cold and wet and a guy who is surrounded by a bunch of hot actresses. Which is what this guy is figuring out.

When he gets out, the ladies are sure to be impressed by the way his pants stick to his smooth, nut-less crotch.

(image source = splash and pacific coast)

Demi Moore is still MrsKutcher

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 1:44 PM

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Demi Moore hasn’t been on twitter much lately, but she was this morning, saying… well you can see what she said. She said she’s keeping her now awkward sounding account. She’s still MrsKutcher, both on twitter and in my heart. It was the greatest romance of my lifetime!

Sony is deceptive

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 1:26 PM

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There’s a line where clever marketing becomes outright lying, and Sony ran right past it with their ‘Amazing Spider-Man’ poster. It’s insulting enough that they’re remaking the number 1 movie of 2002, but now they’re acting like they’re not. A few details got changed but it’s still the same story. That goes for Sony and for the prosecutor in my date rape case, who acts like I should be able to remember where every single pill went like I’m a fucking computer.

(image source of andrew garfield on set = pacific coast)