Lindsay Lohan was drunk at Betty Ford

The bad news for Lindsay Lohan is that she apparently committed several different violations of her probation during her stay at the Betty Ford center. The good news is that it never seems to mater how many laws she breaks, so just throw these on the pile I guess. Palm Desert Police Department officials believe Lindsay Lohan was under the influence of drugs or alcohol while at Betty Ford. As TMZ first reported, the PD...read more

Wednesday headlines

JAKE GYLLENHAAL AND TAYLOR SWIFT - broke up, and now that vindictive psychopath will no doubt try to embarrass him in one of her songs. "And people wonder why I'm gay," Jake will no doubt say to himself. (us.com) LINDSAY LOHAN - says she's not stalking her ex Sam Ronson, and it's just a coincidence that she moved across town to a house 30 feet from where Sam lives. And that seems reasonable. In a city of 15 million...read more

Snooki likes waking up in garbage cans

Snooki and Oscar the Grouch are both dirty, ugly and let strange men fist them, but the similarities don't end there, because she told Ellen Degeneres that there are still days when she wakes up in a garbage can. She calls those "good days". Ellen asked, "Now, when you say if you didn't black out it's a good night for you, are you serious?" Dead serious, she said. "Yes, because I want to remember my night and...read more

Jessica Simpson is a fashion designer

It would be remiss of me to not post the pictures of Jessica Simpsons sexy outfit that she wore in Aspen this week. I wonder what was caused more dicks to shrivel up; the bitter cold or the way her fat shapeless legs filled those tights.read more

Lindsay Lohan has already violated her probation

It would be easy to say that Lindsay Lohan had been out of rehab for less than 24 hours before violating her probation, but to be fair, that's not true, because she was still in rehab when she violated her probation, at least according to the Palm Desert Police Department. Police now assert the actress did, in fact, commit battery against a Betty Ford employee in a Dec. 12 scuffle – and plan to hand the case over to...read more

Lindsay Lohan is stalking Sam Ronson

Earlier it might have sounded like I was blaming Sam Ronson for Lindsay Lohans problems. Far from it. Sam isn't the one who's a dysfunctional drug addict. In fact she's respected and successful. The point was that Lindsay Lohan hasn't changed in any way since being arrested or sent to rehab, and is still the same unstable lunatic she's always been. For example, the old Lindsay would follow Sam around from club to...read more

Tuesday morning headlines

GWYNETH PALTROW - suffered from postpartum depression after giving birth to her son Moses in 2006. "I just thought it meant I was a terrible mother and a terrible person." And fat, Gwyneth, let's not forget about fat. (people) SANDRA BULLOCK AND RYAN REYNOLDS - spent New Years Eve together in Austin. And then he gave it to her in the ass. Maybe. I'm not gonna lie, I didn't read the whole thing. (people) BEN AFFLECK -...read more

Lindsay Lohan now lives next door to Samantha Ronson

Let's be perfectly clear: Lindsay Lohan is white trash, granted it's white trash with very nice tits. White trash often has the nicest tits for some reason, or maybe it's just that they're the ones who let you see them the most. But she's definitely white trash, from a family of white trash, and she's not ever gonna change, at least not until she has to suffer some real consequences for her actions. Which she hasn't....read more

nice catch Maria Menounos! btw I can see your vagina.

Maria Menounos played some football on Miami beach yesterday, and, I'm not sure how but her bikini bottoms kept slipping around and flashing her vagina. Does it have a wooden frame for christs sake, how does it keep sliding around like that? (source = inf daily)read more

brace yourself: Lindsay Lohan is NOT staying in rehab

Earlier it was reported that Lindsay Lohan was staying in rehab another week because she was so committed to her recovery, but now there's a story that's so shocking, I'm scared to touch my monitor, for lightning bolts might literally leap out of the screen and electrocute me. Lindsay Lohan has been released from the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, California after a 90-day stint in rehab, Radar has learned....read more

Chloe Sevigny is in a bikini

Chloe Sevigny is almost cute but isn't, her tits are almost big but not quite, and her ass is just a little bigger than it should be. Put it all together it's an unattractive androgynous mess. Nothing is right about her. It's like she was made with a bunch of leftover parts that no one else wanted. Like Frankenstein. This somehow got way more insulting than I meant it to.read more

Lindsay is staying in rehab. Voluntarily.

Lindsay Lohan was court ordered to stay in rehab until January 3rd, so she could leave today if she wanted too, but for some reason, probably because she's still negotiating with the paparazzi for her first pictures, she now claims she'll stay another week. TMZ says... we're told she may stay until the weekend to get additional treatment. Sources tell us Lindsay is taking precautions before reentering day-to-day life,...read more

prepare to fall in love: Jennifer Love Chewitt is in a bikini

Jennifer Love Hewitt spent New Years Eve in Hawaii with her easily impressed boyfriend Alex Beh, and the picture source said he was "hanging out on a waterproof bean bag". I assume they mean these things in the river and not Hewitt, because, though accurate, they should really be more professional than to describe Hewitt as a "waterproof bean bag". Come on, you guys. (source = bauer griffin)read more

Monday morning headlines

PETE POSTLEHWAITE - died last night, from cancer. He was 64, and made his career by looking 64 for the past 20 years while being the best actor in movies like the Usual Suspects, Inception, and the Town. Called "the best actor in the world" by Steven Spielberg, he gave a movie credibility and made at least part of it good. I'll get you for this cancer! (people) LINDSAY LOHAN - gets out of rehab today, and this time...read more

the top 100 stories of 2010 (50-59)

59. HAYLIE DUFF - got huge implants. Was this really one of the biggest stories of the year? Probably not, no, I just really like girls with big tits. (April 1st) 58. INCEPTION - has a striking number of similarities to a Scrooge McDuck comic from 2002, the same year Christopher Nolan began writing the screenplay. Some say Nolan stole the idea, but maybe the writers of Scrooge McDuck stole the idea from Nolans dreams....read more