Arianny Celeste never disappoints

By brendon July 09, 2012 @ 11:06 AM

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Arianny Celeste hosted the UFC Fight Week Pool Party at The Palms leading up to UFC 148, and at least she’s always great because the actual fights were incredibly disappointing. At least for me because I had Sonnen over Silva, and I attribute every Demian Maia win to blind random luck. It’s impossible to take him seriously after the way Nate Marquardt knocked him out at UFC 102. I’ve never seen anyone punched so hard that they were parallel to the fucking ground. Well I have but it always involved the Hulk. He’s lucky he didn’t burst into flames.

(image source = wenn)

Ron Perlman brought back Hellboy for Make-A-Wish

By brendon July 09, 2012 @ 9:10 AM

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A six-year-old boy with leukemia named Zachary told the Make-A-Wish Foundation that he wanted “to meet and become Hellboy”. So they put on Nazi uniforms and held him down in a swastika drawn with his blood and summoned Satan.

That didn’t work so they contacted Spectral Motion, who created the makeup and costume for both Hellboy movies, and Ron Perlman, the actor who played him. 4 hours in the makeup chair later, Zachary had his wish.

The Hollywood Reporter says…

The visit was the second time in the past three weeks Spectral Motion opened has its doors to Make-A-Wish children. Another fan, Caleb, got a firsthand look at the animatronics behind some of the studio’s well-known creatures, which also have appeared in X-Men: The Last Stand and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

“Wait so the other kid got to meet and become an unkillable hero and I got to see Angels wings from X-Men and the Silver Surfer, who heralds certain death,” Caleb asked when he read this. “What the fuck? Is there something you need to tell me?”

(image source = Spectral Motions facebook)

Hayden Panettiere looks terrific

By brendon July 06, 2012 @ 5:49 PM

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Hayden Panettiere has been on vacation in Cabo with her boyfriend Scotty McKnight (who for some reason is a receiver for the Jets and not the shy one in a boy band as his name clearly implies), but she didn’t give him a handjob on camera like Adrien Brodys girlfriend did. I don’t know what her deal is. Look Hayden, do you want to be famous or not?

(image source = fame/flynet)

Jonah Hill is getting fat again

By brendon July 06, 2012 @ 5:07 PM

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And thank God. I don’t really like Fat Jonah Hill either but Skinny Jonah Hill made my skin crawl. If I have to watch a Jonah Hill in movies–and apparently I do–I’ll take the fat one and then hope Hollywood brings back movies where at some point the likable group needs to win a hot dog eating contest.

(image source = fame/flynet)

Justin Bieber “exceeded 100 mph”, got a ticket

By brendon July 06, 2012 @ 3:50 PM

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Justin Beiber was driving his extra-desperate Fisker Karma down the 101 freeway in Los Angeles today at over 100 miles per hour, this according to L.A. City Councilman Dennis Zine who watched him do it, and who was a LAPD motorcycle officer for 18 years.

“Bieber was driving like a maniac.  He was weaving in and out of traffic.  There was hardly any space between cars as he weaved from lane to lane.”
“If I was on patrol, I would have arrested him for reckless driving.  I was going 60 and he drove by me like he was in a rocket ship.  He was a maniac.”

In Biebers defense, he was allegedly being chased by paparazzi. In not his defense; fuck him. That’s bullshit and had nothing to do with this. He just thinks he’s cool. The little dick drives a glowing silver car, of course the paparazzi can follow him, and now he’s gonna cry–just like a woman–and say “but I’m being followed” as an excuse to drive like an asshole. His gay little car is so conspicuous he might as well drive the Wienermobile and shoot flares out the window.

UPDATE – the LA Times says he was cited for driving in a “reckless manner”, though his exact speed is still a perplexing mystery.

(image source = bauer griffin)

pretty sure this is Adrien Brody getting a handjob

By brendon July 06, 2012 @ 2:49 PM

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If I took my girlfriend to cruise the coast of St. Tropez on a private yacht, like Adrien Brody did with Lara Lieto, I don’t think it’s too much to ask for her to give me a handjob under an outdoor shower, so Adrien and I are in complete agreement so far, but, um, what am I looking at here Adrien. What’s going on there buddy?

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that you want to break down societies sexual taboos, but I’d appreciate it even more if you practiced some of the more adventurous ones in private.

(image source = bauer griffin)

Britney looks good in selected Britney bikini pictures

By brendon July 06, 2012 @ 1:48 PM

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Britney Spears is in Maui today with her two boys and her fiance Jason Trawick, and yesterday she posted this bikini picture on her facebook saying she was “getting ready for some pool time.”

Later, true to her word, we got some paparazzi pictures of her heading to the pool. Say what you will about Britney Spears, but she follows through on her facebook captions.

But it’s her picture, that first one, that has the internet losing it’s mind over her “rock hard abs” and “amazing body“. And she does look good. In that picture. As if she was going to post one where she looked like hell. Backlighting that throws shadows and fortuitously located children > endless exercise and starving yourself.

(image source = splash, fame/flynet)

whats the latest with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes?

By brendon July 05, 2012 @ 3:58 PM

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I hope that headline didn’t imply that I know all the latest developments in the divorce between Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Oh my God this stupid thing is so confusing, and there’s like a billion stories on it every day!

CRUISE WILL FILE RIVAL DIVORCE PAPERS – probably in California, and may ask for full custody of Suri. Did you know you’re not allowed to bluff when asking for full custody, and you actually have to keep the kid? Holy shit did I learn that the hard way. (bbc)

HOLMES WILL BE IN FAMILY COURT – on July 17 in New York City at an order to show cause hearing. Which has something to do with custody and child support. Like all legal talk, the explanation just looks like they typed random words in no particular order. (e!)

THE NIECE OF DAVID MISCAVIGE – who is the leader of Scientology and the guy who set Cruise up with Holmes, says Katie is right to be scared of what Scientology will do to Suri. “My experience in growing up in Scientology is that it is both mentally and at times physically abusive.” Also there’s very little Science going on, despite what the name may lead you to believe. (nydn)

THE DIVORCE IS NOT ABOUT SCIENTOLOGY – according to someone close to Cruise. And it must be true because why would he lie? (tmz)

KATIE TOOK SURI TO THE CHILDRENS MUSEUM OF THE ARTS – in New York today, and she was crying a little. Is that because of the divorce? Is it because I was just off camera in a werewolf mask, pointing at her and then stabbing at the air with a knife? Both? (image source = splash)